Chinese mantis

Chinese mantis
Scientific classification
Kingdom	Animalia
Phylum	Arthropoda
Class	Insecta
Order	Mantodea
Family	Mantidae (it killed them)
Genus	Tenodera
Species	Tenodera sinensis

The Chinese mantis is a biological weapon used by the Chinese government against America during the Qing dynasty as revenge for America passing immigration laws that kept Chinese people from moving to America. in 1895, the Chinese government placed mantis eggs onto potted plants that would be shipped to the United States, so that they would hatch in America and like everyone from China, eat whatever animal they can get their raptorial legs onto, which is incredulously petty and stupid if you think about it. Chinese mantises usually eat insects, though they will also eat mice, snakes, frogs, lizards, small birds, and even dogs if they can access it. They are considered the model minority among insects, due to their status as apex predators, something that few insects manage to achieve.

Characteristics

The Chinese mantis grows up to 7 inches long, though you usually only see 3.5-4 inch specimens. The larger specimens are the ones who report back to the Chinese government in secret.

Life cycle

The Chinese mantis has an absurdly low survival rate during the first instar. Chinese mantises hatch in the spring, as soon as the temperature reaches 65-70 degrees F for a week straight. When they emerge from their ootheca, they crawl out as one huge, disgusting yellow mass of baby mantises unfurling their legs, comprised of up to 500 mantises. Depending on where the ootheca is positioned, up to 3% of nymphs will die, as they didn't fully unfurl their legs, and are strangled by their own siblings for absolutely no reason at all. Most young Chinese mantises die within a week of emergence, as many are killed and cannibalized by their own siblings because they aren't big enough to eat bats, or simply lose the will to live. Sometimes, they hatch in autumn, due to climate change, and are killed as soon as it gets cold. Unfortunately, due to trump's hatred of DEI and refusal to acknowledge climate change being a real thing, nobody cares. Only around 20% make it past the first week, after which the survival rate to adulthood is around 80%. The remaining 20% are eaten alive by their own siblings.

Upon reaching adulthood, the males become sexually addicted and if sexually frustrated, will masturbate furiously, sometimes until they die from exhaustion. If they find a hot bitch mantis, they will immediately advance no matter if the female mantis is consenting; many sexual encounters start out violently. Despite her larger size, if the male holds her for long enough, she has to give in to his sexual advances. Sex lasts around 2-12 hours, despite the male’s 5mm penis.

Invasive species in America

Political positions

The secret regime of the Chinese mantis is characterized by an ideology known as "tenoderism". Their official website, which only they are able to access, states that their general agenda is to eat whatever they can get their hands on, keep murder hornets out of the US, and spy on American citizens.

Public opinion

The tenoderist regime in America has an extraordinarily high approval rating; polls have repeatedly shown approval ratings of at least 98.5%.

Resistance movement

There is a small but widespread resistance movement in America that is attempting to counter the influence of tenoderism on American ecosystems, mostly by destroying their egg cases, and in some cases, the mantises themselves. However, the movement is not supported by any government agencies or major research bodies, and is mostly run by private citizens; therefore, it struggles to gain much support. Some more extreme resistance measures have been proposed, such as mass deportation back to East Asia, but due to lack of funding, such measures have never come into fruition. Not to mention that the tenoderist regime is so secretive that its impact on the American environment is difficult to measure, so it has been debated if such measures are really necessary.