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From today's featured article [Feature an article]

The Reverse Holocaust is a term referring to a handful of hypothetical situations a variety of freewheeling philosophers like to occasionally throw around. These situations range from the metaphorical Reverse Holocaust, to the most literal Reverse Holocaust, and every Reverse Holocaust in between. Despite decades of arguing, philosophers of all camps have yet to decide on which situation is the objective "best."

Adolf Hitler kickstarted the Reverse Holocaust philosophy machine in the 1930s by implementing the Forward Holocaust, or "Holocaust" for short. This was a critical moment in philosophy history, and without it, thoughts of a Reverse Holocaust would just be a fevered dream of some redheaded madman. (Full article...)

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Did you know... [edit]

... that the Deep-fried Mars Bar is responsible for the deaths of thousands in Scotland? (Pictured)

... that within a few weeks of being held in captivity dolphins are able to train humans to stand at the side of a pool and throw them fish?
... that the lawman/outlaw Wild Bill Hickok had one of the most celebrated mustaches in the Wild West?
... that if you were to stack up all the elephants on Earth, those elephants would die?
... that Stupendous Tropical Meningitis Vaccination A, the sister drug to Stupendous Tropical Meningitis Vaccination B, is very effective against Stupendous Tropical Meningitis?
... that the only thing money can't buy is poverty?
... that Freddie Mercury was banned in some European countries due to his extremely radioactive last name?
... that Phonics (pronounced Pa-hon-iks.) is one of the deadliest and most addictive drugs on the streets? It is said to get children "hooked" in four weeks or your money back.

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In the news [edit]

Switzerland wins Eurovision
- Netherlands disqualified in final shocker
YouTube is dead
D.C. stink-bombed by Jihadists and Nazis
Colombia Protests Exclusion from Eurovision; Britney Joins in Support (Pictured)
Ship captain who wrecked Baltimore bridge defeated by Upstate New York bridge
NFL imposes speed limit and bans trick plays
Forecast calls for a leapin' Lousy Smarch weather
Larry David gets Hinkled by Anti-Israel Protesters
Taylor Swift's favorite NFL team wins rigged Super Bowl, big whoop
Elon Musk plants brain chip into first human guinea pig
Climate activists ruin Jackson Pollock painting, no one notices
Stalemate in Ukraine: Zelenskyy flees for greener pastures
Steamboat Willie enters public domain, several Mickey Mouse horror films and games announced
Santa's Elves on strike
UnNews finally able to write obituaries for Shaft, Bull and Chandler
Will Barbenheimer beat JigSaw in his own game?

Ongoing: Russian Invasion · Eurovision
Recent deaths: O. J. Simpson · Bernard Hill · Nemo's first trophy · Roger Corman · Chrissie from Jaws · Drake's whole mans career
Upcoming deaths: Kris Kristofferson · Jimmy Carter · Vladimir Putin · The U.S. Federal Budget · Richard Simmons · Kate Middleton · Market demand for Tesla cars · "New York Knicks suck" jokes (watch this jinx them lol)

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On this day [edit]

May 15: Feast of St. Kielbasa (Poland)

269 - Saint Kielbasa, patron saint of charred meats and finger licking, is martyred over a hot grill and served on a kebab. (Pictured)
1524 - First Running of the Bulls held in Chicago: Michael Jordan gores two unlucky fans and Dennis Rodman is put down after breaking his hind leg.
1852 - Former Queen of Wisconsin hands over his royal cheese crown over to President James K. Polk, in an unabashed show of American imperialism.
1898 - Country of Italy founded, Italians relieved after spending all week looking for it.
1976 - International Society of Procrastinators debate forming organization, decide to do it later.
1999 - Bill Clinton announces that America will create the world's first edible veggie burger, "Not because it's easy, but because it's hard!"

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Picture of the day

"Honey, have you noticed how high our life insurance rates are these days?"

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