Main Page on Wheels

Welcome to Uncyclopedia on Wheels,

the content-free encyclopedia that anyone on Wheels can edit.
37,712 articles in English on Wheels!

From today's featured article on Wheels [Feature an article]

Recently, I came to the realization that I don't exist; I haven't for years. And when I say years, I do in fact mean infinity, it's just that I'm lazy, and it's simpler to write "years" than to be bothered with typing out all those zeros.

Or at least I would be lazy, if I existed, but I don't.

Now, for the benefit of you nosy people who have no business reading someone's private diary—if you need reassurance at this early point, re-read the title. And for those of you who are too lazy to re-check the title above (though not in comparison to me, because, as I've already stated, I don't exist to allow a comparison), this non-treatise by a non-entity is untitled "Contemplating my non-existence". If it were in fact an actual treatise written by an actual entity, it would be instead titled "Contemplating my existence".

Now let's just dismiss your next point of contention right away by saying that the fact that you are reading these non-words in a non-existent article does not in any way, shape or form constitute some kind of proof that they were written by me, and therefore I must exist. (Full article...)

Recently featured:

Archive · Vote for featured articles · Purge

Did you know... [edit]

... that Canadian baseball (Pictured) is a thing?

... that testicles are edible and a good source of protein?
... that we must nuke the whales, or the hippies will win?
... that your birth certificate is an apology letter from the condom factory?
... that in 2001 George W. Bush passed the No Child Left Behind Act, which forbids soldiers in Iraq from leaving their children behind?
... that existing is highly dangerous, and should not be performed unless you are competent enough to understand how to perform it?
... that the dolphin is the only animal other than man that laughs at its own farts?
... that the sky is up and the ground is down, except in Australia where the opposite is true?

Archive · Suggest new entries

In the news on Wheels [edit]

Donald Trump is the first convicted President of the United States

Donald Trump found GUILTY ON ALL CHARGES (Pictured), soon to debut "prison orange" business suit
Antarctica becomes embroiled in upside-down flag controversy
Michael Jackson comes back to life
Justin Bieber gives birth to a baby, baby, baby, oooh
Switzerland wins Eurovision
- Netherlands disqualified in final shocker
YouTube is dead
D.C. stink-bombed by Jihadists and Nazis
Colombia Protests Exclusion from Eurovision; Britney Joins in Support
Ship captain who wrecked Baltimore bridge defeated by Upstate New York bridge
NFL imposes speed limit and bans trick plays
Forecast calls for a leapin' Lousy Smarch weather
Larry David gets Hinkled by Anti-Israel Protesters
Taylor Swift's favorite NFL team wins rigged Super Bowl, big whoop
Elon Musk plants brain chip into first human guinea pig

Ongoing: Russian Invasion · Drake-Kendrick Lamar feud · Israel-Hamas conflict
Recent deaths: Roger Corman · Drake's "whole mans career" · Dabney Coleman · Kabosu · Richard M. Sherman (Disney musician) · Doug Ingle · Bill Walton
Upcoming deaths: Kris Kristofferson · Jimmy Carter · Vladimir Putin · Richard Simmons · Kate Middleton · Market demand for Tesla cars · Drake's sanity

UnNews Main on Wheels · Archive

On this day [edit]

June 7: Execute a Journalist Day (Iran)

5000 BC - Wheel reinvented after initial square-shape design doesn't do the thing wheels are supposed to.
100 BC - Persia detains Greek journalists covering the Battle of Thermopylae.
212 BC - Archimedes arrested for indecent exposure. (Pictured)
1222 - Mary had a little lamb, with tumeric, black pepper and some olive oil.
1893 - Mohandas Gandhi commits his first act of civil disobedience by neglecting to pay a traffic ticket.
1905 - Norway files for divorce from Sweden after ninety-one years of agonizing marriage.
1981 - Israel bombs a nuclear reactor in Iran in celebration of the Jewish holiday Shavuot.
2010 - Mick Jagger finally gets some satisfaction, is later arrested behind a local Nando's.
2012 - Mick Jagger no longer has sympathy for the Devil, and is banished to hell.

Archive · View today · View tomorrow

Picture of the day on Wheels

Artist representation of the famous Charge of the Chainsaw Brigade, a pivotal moment on the road to victory which demonstrated the wisdom of bringing Canadian lumberjacks into the war.

Image credit: Asahatter
View image · Nominate new image · View all featured images

Other areas of Uncyclopedia on Wheels

How to be funny and not just stupid – for help with that comedy thing on Wheels
Policies and guidelines – for the boring rules on Wheels no one follows
Formatting – for help on editing on Wheels
Requested articles – for inspiration on Wheels, or lack thereof
Village Dump – to throw angry invectives at other users on Wheels
Community portal – for general community shenanigans on Wheels

Sister projects

Uncyclopedia is hosted by the Uncyclomedia Foundation on Wheels, a non-profitable organization that also hosts a range of other projects on Wheels as well as some foreign language Uncyclopedias and Illogicopedia.

Uncyclopedia languages

This Uncyclopedia on Wheels is written in English, supposedly. Started in 2005, it currently contains 37,712 articles on Wheels. Many other parody wikis on Wheels are available; some of the lamest are listed below.