UnNews:Latest Narcissism Wave Grips Los Angeles County, Women Urged to Stay Low for Now
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This article is part of UnNews, your source for up-to-the-picosecond misinformation. |
20 July 2022
’’LOS ANGELES’’’, California. — “We’re definitely in a surge, we’re going to see increases but I’m not sure if it’s going to be as dramatic an increase as we saw with the winter narcissism wave,” said Dr. Bunsen Honeydew, that Doctor puppet from the Muppet Show. “It’s almost guaranteed that somebody is going to be breathing out the virus into the air and there’s a good chance that you might be inhaling some guy’s narcissism that he just breathed out that may contain the Narcissism virus in the aerosol,” he said in a phone interview last week from inside his suitcase, urging women to "Wear masks outdoors, avoid all males at all costs, and carry swords, pepper spray, and flame throwers when outside of their homes."
- Adam Bein, Cub Reporter "This Narcissism Story Better Be about ME!" ScienceSchmience Daily, July 15, 2022