Mushroom Kingdom

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This article is about the kingdom. For the heavy metal band, see The Mushroom Kingdom.
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Great Empire of Unpronounceable Tourist Traps
Mushroom Kingdom
MushroomFlag.jpg Another castle logo.png
Flag Coat of Arms
Motto: It's-a-me, Mario!
Anthem: The music from 1-1
Itsa Luigi Time.png
A map of the Mushroom Kingdom. Please excuse the Gay Luigi covering most of the screen.
CapitalToad Town
Largest cityMushroom Corner City
DemonymToad
Official language(s)English, Japanese, Italian, Gibberish
GovernmentMonarchy
‑ MonarchPrincess Peach
‑ Enemy monarchKing Bowser
National Hero(es)Mario, Luigi
CurrencyCoins
ReligionMariology
Major exportsMagic mushroom
Major importsPipes
National animalYoshi

The Mushroom Kingdom is a magical land full of mushrooms that can only be accessed through pipes found throughout Brooklyn, Italy and Japan. Various attempts have been made to extend public transportation links to other pipes around the Earth but funding for this has been scarce. Due to lack of funding, it was learned that one can enter the Mushroom Kingdom through simple means; the consumption of Magic Mushrooms. The Mushroom Kingdom is noted for its lush green fields, waterfalls, and killer population of mushrooms. It is also the headquarters of Mario and his endless army of Toads.

Access to the Mushroom Kingdom[edit | edit source]

There are numerous ways to enter the Mushroom Kingdom.

The first and likely most common is the speed pipe; a sewage pipe built underground in Brooklyn, Italy, and Japan. These pipes are not available to the public. Only Mushroom Kingdom citizens living outside the region are authorized to use them. Lack of immigration has caused a great dive in the economy in recent years.

Another more convenient, though expensive, way to travel the Mushroom Kingdom is the Teleporfiocchunuculolium more commonly know as the Warp Zone. Warp zones take place in many of nintendo's mario plots and are currently being perfected. They are likely to become a scientific breakthrough although they are not legal for trade in or off the island due to hi radioactivity. Work is being done to produce a "greener" version of the warp zone.

History of the Mushroom Kingdom[edit | edit source]

Main article: History of the Mushroom Kingdom

Koopa migration[edit | edit source]

The ancestors of the modern Koopa race arrived in what is now the Mushroom Kingdom about 80 thousand years ago in response to human encroachment. During their migration, they built a series of warp pipes on Earth before closing them off. The Koopas then formed a thriving kingdom, and built most of the landmarks seen in the Mushroom Kingdom today.

Founding[edit | edit source]

The Mushroom Kingdom was founded in 1883 while Vince Pollivure was looking for a new place to grow his shrooms. He then found the land after discovering a series of ancient warp piped built by the Koopas and introduced mushrooms into the Kingdom. These mushrooms quickly which overwhelmed the Koopa population and forced them to retreat to the Dark Lands. Following this, the Koopas tried to destroy the invasive mushrooms via the use of a nuke, but this attempt failed and caused the mushrooms to evolve into the modern Toads due to nuclear radiation. The nuclear radiation also caused the Koopas' king, Bowser, to become immortal and take on the appearance he has today.

It took 4 weeks after the Koopas nuked the mushrooms before the shrooms to take off and take over the land. They began forming buildings and houses. Vince was amazed at his shroom feild, he then decided that it was no longer a feild, it was a city. The he named it, Bondu. The city continued to grow and no one had no clue how it was doing this.

The shrooms didn't act like this in Paris, but it had to do with the soil and other stuff. After 27 years of the Bondu being a city, Vince died. He consumed to much shrooms and died. His son, Bonclair, took over and renamed the city after his dad Vinceland. Everybody thought it was stupid and banished Bonclair from Vinceland. The people renamed the city, Shitty Homes and Retarded Outlaws Over Math. (A.K.A) SHROOM.

SHROOM, then became town by a midget who created the first Mushroom Person, Koomba. Koombas at the time were the most feared creatures in all of SHROOM. Everyone decied to hang the midget and they did. SHROOM also, changed it's name to the Mushroom Kingdom, once a human named Princess Apple took control in 1890. She was a 21 year old lady who gained her power from her rich father.

However, Princess Apple was assassinated 20 years later, and the kingdom fell into anarchy. Princess Eva Braun took control of the Kingdom in 1938, ending the First Anarchy.

World War II[edit | edit source]

In 1940, Adolf Hitler signed a non-aggression pact with Bowser and invaded the Mushroom Kingdom. The Mushroom Kingdom fell in just a few weeks. Hitler kidnapped Princess Eva Braun and forced her into a marriage.

In 1942, Bowser retreated from his occupation zone in the Mushroom Kingdom, allowing Hitler to take control of the entire kingdom. However, this was not to last as the kingdom was liberated by the glorious leader Joseph Stalin in 1944 when he discovered a warp pipe in Moscow.

After World War II[edit | edit source]

The Second Anarchy in the Mushroom Kingdom's history began in 1946 when the Soviet Union retreated from the Mushroom Kingdom's territory. The Second Anarchy's roots began in 1940, when Adolf Hitler kidnapped the princess Eva Braun. Eva Braun didn't have any heirs, causing the Mushroom Kingdom to erupt into anarchy when no successors were found. Princess Peach and King Toadstool took power in the Mushroom Kingdom in 1968, ending the Second Anarchy.

In 1985, Bowser launched an invasion into the Mushroom Kingdom. He and his army of Koopas launched a spell into all of the Toads, turning them into bricks and other stuff. Princess Peach, the only person who could undo the spell, was kidnapped by Bowser. Mario and Luigi, who only recently joined the Mushroom Kingdom, journeyed through eight worlds to find Bowser and defeat him. Bowser's first "defeat" was accomplished in 1985, however, since Bowser is immortal due to excessive exposure to radiation, he could never truly be defeated. Since then, Bowser has attempted to kidnap the Princess and get "defeated" many times.

Mushroom Kingdom Music and Culture[edit | edit source]

Sports are also very popular within the Mushroom Kingdom. Kart racing, tennis, baseball, soccer and melee fighting are just a few among the sports popular among the citizens of the mushroom kingdom. Kart racing especially has been known to attract denizens from all over the Mushroom Kingdom, because of its elaborate races and tournaments.

Gambling makes up a major component of the Mushroom Kingdom culture and economy, it helps to facilitate the spread of gold coins throughout the surrounding areas. Magical items like leaves, fire flowers, and invincibility stars are also up for grabs at these official houses of gambling.

The Mushroom Kingdom has also had a rich musical tradition since the earliest days of its founding. Electronic music is a popular genre enjoyed by the citizens of the Mushroom Kingdom.

Geography[edit | edit source]

The Mushroom Kingdom is divided into several distinct provinces by sudden natural variations in the climate, all encompassing their own unique set of citizens.

Grass Land[edit | edit source]

Princess Peach's Castle I, a few days before its destruction on 9/11.

World 1-1 is what surrounds Princess Peach's castle, it consists mainly of lush green fields, long brick roads, boxes and brick highways suspended in the air. The waterfalls and streams that flow through the area generally do not have bridges over them, leading to the need to jump over them or plunge to certain death. Furthermore, there are many small mushroom towns dotted about that have gambling houses to obtain items of worth. Some say that Grass Land is, in fact, part of the Mushroom World others say its part of India. They are lying vicious commie robot ninjas from the future that wish to slander the image of the Mushroom Kingdom.

Desert Land[edit | edit source]

Extending beyond the borders of Grass Land, the Mushroom Kingdom also encompasses a large desert that is difficult to travel during the summer months of the year, though it is generally acknowledged by citizens that it can be quite delightful during other periods during the year. Pyramids and other artifacts, possibly of an older civilization, mark this area. Occasionally during the hot summer months, the Livid With Rage Sun will come down to catch a breeze or two, resulting in having to jump over him or be burned to a crisp. Some say that Desert Land is, in fact, part of the Mushroom World others say its part of Egypt. They are lying vicious commie robot ninjas from the future that wish the slander the image of the Mushroom Kingdom.

Water Land[edit | edit source]

Located off the northern coast of the Mushroom Kingdom, this is a recently colonized area of the fledgling kingdom. Small towns are located throughout the area but it is generally difficult to travel from one to another without the aid of a Frog Suit or other form of aquatic transportation. It is also well known for the dangerous native Big Bertha fish, which can swallow humans whole. Some say that Water Land is, in fact, part of the Mushroom World others say its part of the ocean. They are lying vicious commie robot ninjas from the future that wish the slander the image of the Mushroom Kingdom .

Giant Land[edit | edit source]

This island province is one of the most dangerous areas in the Mushroom Kingdom. Due to it's geographic inaccessibility, it has become a scientific breeding ground for grossly mutated creatures and citizens of the Mushroom Kingdom. There are also many BALCO test labs here. The R.F.A. heavily patrols the border between this area and the rest of the Mushroom Kingdom to prevent any attacks by the mutated creatures. Some say that Giant Land is, in fact, part of the Mushroom World where as others say its part of China. They are lying vicious commie robot ninjas from the future that wish the slander the image of the Mushroom Kingdom.

Sky Land[edit | edit source]

Yoshis prey on the weak

Flight was pioneered by Mario in his early adventures to the Mushroom Kingdom. The colonization of Sky Land is a result of continued progress in this field. Sky Land was colonized in A.D. 1990. It is generally believed that this was done as part of a large government project to promote tourism throughout the Mushroom Kingdom. Gambling, drugs, and prostitution are rampant in Sky Land due to the tourism. Recently, legislation to stem the tide of "moral decay" has been proposed by the Mushroom Council. Some say that Sky Land is, in fact, part of the Mushroom World others say it is part of Canada. They are lying vicious commie robot ninjas from the future that wish the slander the image of the Mushroom Kingdom.

Ice Land[edit | edit source]

Another attempt of the Mushroom Council to extract tourism money from otherwise uninhabitable lands, the province of Ice Land is almost completely covered in snow and ice. While several ski lodges and a track devoted to the Super Kart Tournament were founded here, Ice Land is generally not popular due to its extremely cold climate. It is kindly referred to by most tourists as "Slip-y Slide-y Ice world." Some say that Ice Land is, in fact, part of the Mushroom World, others say its the Artic. They are lying vicious commie robot ninjas from the future that wish the slander the image of the Mushroom Kingdom others say its part of Greenland.

Pipe Land[edit | edit source]

One of the projects of Dr. Von Fungi was to create a massive public transportation system that would extend throughout the Mushroom Kingdom. The central hub was to be on an atoll at the southern border of the Grass Land, so that local and international travel would be easily accessible to the public. As with most government projects, the result was complete and utter chaos. Pipe Land has become a confusing mass of pipes who have no logical pattern to their destinations. There have been cases where people have gone missing for years and been presumed dead, only to later turn up in pipe land. Reform legislation has been proposed by the Mushroom Council but no funds have been earmarked for the coming fiscal year. Some say that Pipe Land is, in fact, part of the Mushroom World. They are lying vicious commie robot ninjas from the future that wish the slander the image of the Mushroom Kingdom some say its part of London's sewers.

Dark Land[edit | edit source]

The headquarters for Bowser and his Koopa army, Toads who don't pay their electricity bills reside here. It is filled with lava, so you better be careful not to fall in unless you want to end up soup. It is also filled with many doomships. Some say it is part of the Mushroom World but others say it's inside a volcano in Hawaii. They are lying vicous commie robot nigas from the future that wish to slander the image of the Mushroom Kingdom.

Yoshi's Island[edit | edit source]

An island located off the south-west coast of the Mushroom Kingdom. Officially called the Yoshi Republic. Often called Level 1, Dinosaur Land, SMW, Retard Land or Japan. It is inhabited by a sophisticated, advanced race known as the Yoshi. Around 1180 AD, the enslaved Yoshis desired independence. After training for several months on Age of Empires II, the Yoshis staged a bloody revolt against their mushroom overlords. The Yoshi Republican Army and the Mushroom Imperial Army fought for ten years in a bloody Nintendo Revolution. Casualties in the Mushroom Army were so high that Princess Peach eventually decided to piss on the whole campaign, and the Toads simply left Yoshi's island. The Yoshis were quickly forgotten about, and nobody even knew that they existed until 1991, when the "Super Nintendo" age arrived. Yoshi's island is one of those countries that's just there, kinda like Poland.

Economy[edit | edit source]

The Mushroom Kingdom's most valuable export.

The Mushroom Kingdom trades principally in mushrooms. Compared to a neighbouring country called "The Bean Bean Kingdom," the Mushroom Kingdom economy is amazing, 10 Bean Bean Kingdom coins is worth 1 Mushroom Kingdom coin.

The Mushroom Kingdom also holds a significant amount of gold coins that are used to bankroll the large construction projects that are constantly occurring throughout the Mushroom Kingdom. There are red coins which are worth 2 gold coins and blue coins which are worth 5 gold coins but nobody heard of them until 1996.

See Also[edit | edit source]