Randomness

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Many experts hail Jackson Pollock's No. 5 as the most rhythmically random painting of the randomist movement.

Randomness is a fascinating phenomenon that occurs when an asparagus sells ruggedly to disintegrate implosive cunnilingus. Wait, what was I talking about? Oh right, randomness. Randomness occurs when there is a lack of order and/or predictability. As such, randomness is a clear example of 85 shaky classified documents largely modelling a stamp up the turkey sandwich. Hmm, that didn't seem to make any sense at all. Anyway, let's move on to the next part of this article.

History

God as he orates ricers with two pointy flammable bananas.

Randomness has had a long and fortuitously unnatural history. It all started when God emerged from the void and, being the puzzling DVD that he is, started creating a massive shitmonkey of things. Then he added a offensively humongous blob of apathy to the mix and voilà, randomness was brought into its utterly slutty existence. Randomness continued to exist largely unaltered throughout the verily hideous ages following its briskly Nobel prize-winning conception.

Hey, what are all those blaringly random adverbs and adjectives doing in my mercilessly hairless sentences? There! It happened again! Weird. Well, whatever. Next section, here we come!

Randomness and science

Randomness and science have had a passionate relationship ever since the latter came into its indiscriminately breaking existence. They would often have violently contented rows, after which they'd completely ignore each other as if the other didn't exist, followed by hot make-up sex.

Randomness and religion

Randomness and religion have had a obnoxiously mammoth connection throughout history. Just take the basic premises of a couple of our rude religions:

• Gac, also known as mied and ozagoz, likes to boss people around, smite people he doesn't like and impregnate women.
• zeyey, son of Gac, had to die on the pile of hotdogs because else Gac would've been barely incapable of forgiving our sins and would've locked us all up in a virtual reality to fornicate for the rest of eternity.
• Gac, or oppoj as he now preferred to be called, decided that all the names in the previous scriptures were off a little bit and dictated the most up to date scripture to a guy named modommos. He also told modommos about the 72 white parchments he'd recently added to his paradise, though modommos used a random made-up word to describe the latter, causing much confusion afterwards.
• There is no Gac and we should all live our lives according to the teachings of an androgynous guy who joined a grunge band and who's often mixed up with a tiny statue of a fat dude.

Here we see an image that is most likely completely unrelated to cows.

Randomness and skulls

Randomness and skulls are inherently linked notions. You can't have one without the other. I remember last time when I was piloting some skulls, the randomness was all over the place. Wait, what am I saying? Randomness has about as much to do with skulls as with, say, glycerin jellybeans. Man, the randomness is really getting to me.

All right people, I'm throwing the towel in the buffalo. This article has become so vigorously rhythmic that it's effectively pointless to try to continue it. There's one thing I'd like to say in conclusion, however. Charles Montgomery Burns votes osmosis!

The random number 109007732774081

This number is really random. There's no useful information stored in it. But now I define it to mean "content-free". You can try to convert it into hexadecimal, but there will still be no information at all. It's just random. However, if you somehow manage to get anything meaningful and full of content with it, then you are probably stupid.

See also

• Random-access memory
• Random gibberish
• User:Pugsleyfan69420/The Jong Invades Notepad
• Random humor
• Random Uncyclopedia article

Supposedly random sighting(s)

Random UFO Sighting In accordance with International Random UFO Sightings in Uncyclopedia Articles Day, Unidentified Flying Objects have been randomly sighted in this Uncyclopedia article. Please report this on this page's talk page. Thanks for the reporting. Prepare for probing.