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From today's featured article

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At 6:55 this morning, my alarm clock went off. Still tired, I hit the snooze button and tried to fall back asleep. Five minutes later, my alarm clock went off again. Still tired, I hit the snooze button and tried to fall back asleep. Five minutes later, my alarm clock went off again. Still tired, I hit the snooze button and tried to fall back asleep. Five minutes later, my alarm clock went off again. Still tired, I hit the snooze button and tried to fall back asleep. Five minutes later, my alarm clock went off again. Still tired, I hit the snooze button and tried to fall back asleep. Five minutes later, my alarm clock went off again. Still tired, I hit the snooze button and tried to fall back asleep. Five minutes later, my alarm clock went off again. Still tired, I hit the snooze button and tried to fall back asleep. Five minutes later, my alarm clock went off again. Still tired, I hit the snooze button and tried to fall back asleep. (Full article...)

Did you know...

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In the news

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Downing Street denies this image.

Ongoing: The wait for GTA VI and Spaceballs 2 • Rich New Yorkers fleeing Mamdanistan • Larry Sanger's war on Wikipedia • Non-Bears invading Tennessee • Nanny state officials breaching people's privacy rights via enforcing social media bans and digital ID under the pretext of "think of the children!" • Venezuelans unsure whether to freak out or celebrate • Non-playoff NFL teams firing their coaches • Jim and John Harbaugh family vacation in Cancun

Recent deaths: Doug Dimmadome • Zed's dead, baby (He was also the bad guy in The Mask) • Animal Farm • Rob Reiner • Bowen Yang's tenure on SNL • Patrick Mahomes' and his backup's ACLs • Brigitte Bardot • Carl Yastrzmski • 2025 • The MetroCard • Stranger Things • Kali • Vecna • The Upside Down • New York Rangers' fans livers and kidneys • Green Bay Packers', Carolina Panthers', Jacksonville Jaguars', Los Angeles Chargers', Philadelphia Eagles', and Pittsburgh Steelers' seasons • the other Black guy from John Carpenter's The Thing • Bob Weir

Not dead: Eleven

Upcoming deaths: Donald Trump • NYC's economy • Weed • 67% of people trying to understand why 6 of 7 news stories mention "6-7" • Dick van Dyke, eventually • Netflix • The Sabres actually being good? • Dancin' Maduro • The Kansas City "Chiefs" • Aaron Rodgers' career, maybe

On this day

"Caesar, it's the middle of January, there's no more fireworks!"

January 13: Julius Caesar's New Year's Eve

  • 45 BC - Julius Caesar celebrates New Year's thirteen days late, after everyone else is already done with that sort of thing, angering the Senate. (Pictured)
  • 1610 - Galileo Galilei discovers the fourth satellite of Jupiter, but initially confuses it for a hemorrhoid.
  • 1942 - Henry Ford gets a patent for his new automobile, which is 50% more Nazi than regular cars.
  • 1996 - Annie Lennox accidentally breaks wind near a microphone, is immediately awarded two Grammys and a BRIT award.
  • 1998 - Gay activist sets himself on fire in St. Peter's Square to protest the Catholic Church's condemnation of self-immolation.
  • 2012 - Cruise ship Costa Concordia tips over on its side after a celebrity cooking class puts cream on their pasta carbonara.

Picture of the day

28 Gays Later
 28 Gays Later is a post-apocalyptic horror/shocker film released in 2008. It has become a cult film in the city of San Francisco, as much of its imagery and drama hit home with many fans describing it as the most hoboerotic experience since Top Gun. The film's sequel, 28 Twinks Later, proved to be a box office disappointment.

Image credit: Sonje
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