Babel:Ch
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- Bienvenidos a la versión suiza de la desciclopedia, la enciclopedia neutral que cualquiera puede editar, siempre que disponga de suficientes fondos. Sophia ha abierto 40,964 cuentas de banco desde el mes de enero de 2005. Antes de editar nada, leas guías de beneficios de la Declaración de Guerra y manual de la neutralidad.
- Bienvenue à l'Uncyclopédia suisse, l'encyclopédie tout-à-fait neutre et fait complètement de fromage que n'importe qui peut redacter s'ils ont des fonds suffisants. Sophia a établi 40,964 comptes bancaires numérotés en suisse depuis l'ouverture en janvier 2005. Avant l'édition, lisez SVP les directives d'investissement, de bénéfice de guerre et le manuel de neutralité!
- Willkommen in der Schweizer Uncyclopedia, die neutrale Enzyklopädie, die, gänzlich frei von Käse, dafür sorgt, dass jeder veröffentlichen kann, der ausreichende Finanzen besitzt. Sophia hat seit der Öffnung im Januar 2005 ganze 40,964 Nummernkonten eröffnet. Vor der Ausgabe lesen Sie auf jeden Fall die Richtlinien der Investition von Kriegsgewinn und das Neutralitätshandbuch!
- Benvenuto al Uncyclopedia svizzero, l'enciclopedia neutra che chiunque può pubblicare ma soltanto se hanno fondi monetari suffient. Sophia ha aperto 40,964 clienti numerati della banca dall'apertura nel mese di gennaio del 2005. Prima della pubblicazione, legga prego la guida di riferimento di investimento di profitto di guerra ed il manuale di neutralità.
 Good evening crew of the RMS Titanic. My name is Scuttlebutt, Sidney Scuttlebutt. I am the head of the exterior furniture section on this ship. My job is to provide deckchairs for the comfort of all First Class and Second Class passengers. Third Class passengers are not entitled to deckchairs so you will not need to show them how they work. This may be the Titanic's maiden voyage but I am already a professional at the art of deckchair maintenance as I have worked on the Titanic's sister ship RMS Olympic. I believe a carefully prepared deckchair with the option of a blanket and cushion is essential if travellers want to take in the cold April air of 1912. So I will now demonstrate what we do. What was that? You want to know more about the lifeboats? We can talk about that tomorrow. Those boats are to rescue people at sea, not the people here as this ship is unsinkable, made of steel that is light enough to float. There is no need to be worried. For those who really want to learn more about lifeboats, I understand Captain Smith will be holding a class tomorrow. (Full article...) Recently featured: You can vote (even Women!) for your favorite articles to be featured. More of the best of Uncyclopedia Selected anniversaries March 14: American π Day
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Banker of the Month Holy cock! We may have forgotten to update these over these last few months. The days we missed could be counted as few as if at all. We have just updated this since last May. How awesome! So basically, let's get to business. Take off your pants; IFYMB! wins Writer of the Month for September 2014. His hit singles include the frankly libellous UnNews:Nude photos of celebrities leaked, the almost-topical UnDebate:What does the fox say? and the spiritually upliftingUnNews:Thursday is a dirty whore. Let us all clap for him because I said so.
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