Babel:1337

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Biffy Clyro (1).jpg

Biffy Clyro is a Scottish rock band from Scotland. As well as being Scottish, nobody outside of the rainy isles has heard of them. The band is composed of one Scottish guy, and two other Scottish guys who are for some reason twins, even though they look nothing alike. During concerts, the trio are joined by musicians Mike Vennart and Dick "99% of Gamblers Quit Before They Win it Big" Ingram. Currently signed to 14th Floor Records, they have released at least six albums. Following the first three, their maybe-existent fan base grew to slightly larger numbers. As for who they actually are, I'm still not sure. I'm pretty sure they're a band, however. As well as being from Scotland, they are apparently very popular in the UK, which is not a place I've visited. As for their music... I'm not sure that exists either. (Full article...)

Featured today, a long long time ago

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DID Y0U KN0W...

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  • ... that Japanese ninjas are among those who have tried to find a way to get across the Great Wall of China? (Pictured)
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  • ... that there was more then one model for the Mona Lisa? (Pictured)
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  • ... that on 17 June 2007, Britain was mercilessly hit by an attack of 'falling water'?
  • ... that the apostrophe is a small animal which has infected millions of books?
  • ... that much like your cancer-stricken Grandpa, the United Kingdom would rather shit the bed than accept its fate and fade into obscurity?
  • ... that Robert Shaw won the Northeast Regional Dogfishing Open in 1974, the first sporting event to be broadcast on the new ESPN network?
  • ... that sheep shrink when it rains?
  • ... that the Uncyclopedia Discord link contains a virus called which infects your computer with the Uncyclopedia Discord?
  • ... that when a suicide bomber dies and goes to paradise, he is given 72 virgins? But all of them are wiki editors?
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  • ... that wearing a Top Hat is not only a sound fashion choice, it gives you somewhere to hide candy?
  • ... that sovereign citizens have all the rights of U.S citizens, without having to follow any of the laws?
  • ... that in 2007 the Department of Homeland Security released a series of informative pamphlets on surviving a terrorist attack?
  • ... that the only way the bible could have more holes is if it were written on Jesus's skin?
  • ... that Earth has 1 sextillion grains of sand?
  • ... that the admins will never approve your DYK submission nor will they read these suggestions?
  • ... that Osama bin Laden is actually alive and well and hiding in your closet?
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  • ... that to the untrained ear, John Aglethorpe's Ode to the Monotony of Life may simply sound like one continuous, monotonous tone, but the song is actually composed mostly of alterations between the A sharp and B flat notes tied together?
  • ... that the Red Baron, in addition to being the deadliest ace fighter pilot of World War I, traveled through time?
  • ... that there is a pipe bomb placed in your mailbox?
  • ... that women get periods, but men get commas?
  • ... that you've just lost the game?
  • ... that Former President Bush prefers his Tuskegee airmen with a side of risotto and mushrooms?
  • ... that Ram Ranch really rocks?
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  • ... that Burger King briefly attempted to introduce traditional British cuisine in the US? (Pictured)
  • ... no, you didn't! Stop lying!
  • ... that the handgun is one of the most pitiful guns you can find, seeing as it's part of your hand?
  • ... that abstinence is only 99.999% effective?
  • ... that those suspicious white spots on your professor's blazer are in fact mayonnaise?
  • ... that the police are at your door?
  • ... that 'wax-on, wax-off' doesn't help teach kids karate, but just gets your cars waxed, free of charge?
  • ... that I'm better than this person in particular?
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  • ... that silent radio (Pictured) existed before regular radio?

IN 7H3 N3W5

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0N 7HI5 D4Y...

Self harm is bad in any form.

March 11: Stop Hitting Yourself Day (Mexico)

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Writer of the month.png

Holy cock! We may have forgotten to update these over these last few months. The days we missed could be counted as few as if at all. We have just updated this since last May. How awesome!

So basically, let's get to business. Take off your pants; IFYMB! wins Writer of the Month for September 2014. His hit singles include the frankly libellous UnNews:Nude photos of celebrities leaked, the almost-topical UnDebate:What does the fox say? and the spiritually upliftingUnNews:Thursday is a dirty whore.

Let us all clap for him because I said so.


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Do not pull your pants up just yet. We got a Uncyclopedian of the Month award winner up in here! Give it up for Leverage!


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Since there is no winner for the Noob of the Moment, you are all now noobs. There are a couple of long-running nominations, but they are stuck there, like foetuses in suspended animation, and I fear for their souls.


Vote for Writer of the Month | Vote for Noob of the Moment | Vote for Uncyclopedian of the Month | Past Winners


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