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Dead Dicks, besides being the enduring legacy of mythomaniacal former U.S. Presidents, Lyndon Baines Johnson and "Tricky Dick" Nixon, are also a numerical unit of one in Vietnam War "grunt-speak." The term was first used to describe a war stiff reported by the Vietnamese and American governments during the "body count" game. "Body-count" was a ghastly, albeit highly rated televised sport notorious for being imposed on the citizens of Vietnam and America by the captains of both teams. Essentially a dead dick is the complete opposite of a live dick, also known in Vietnam as a "Swinging Dick." From the onset both sides of the conflict agreed via negotiations that "the only good dick is a dead one." Accordingly the scoring system came into play and the game was once again a-foot. (Full article...)
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DID Y0U KN0W...
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- ... that in Rhode Island any marriage where either of the party is an idiot and/or lunatic is considered null & void? And therefore, almost everyone in the state is, technically, a bastard? (Pictured)
- ... that the average human male between the ages of 18 and 42 has thought about sex with Brad Pitt at least once?
- ... that Crow war chieftain Old White Man was nothing like his brothers, Walks Over Eggshells and Sees No Color?
- ... that over 30 million Chinese peasants died in the Great Leap Forwards due to inadequate long-jump scores?
- ... that in Spanish, "¡Chinga tu madre, cabrón!" means "Have a nice day"? Tell your friends!
- ... that I don't like them putting chemicals in the water that turn the frickin' frogs gay?
- ... Donald Trump? More like... Donald Gay! Hah, gottem!
- ... that in 2007 the Department of Homeland Security released a series of informative pamphlets on surviving a terrorist attack?

- ... that the fictional droid C-3PO is fluent in over six million forms of communication, but only four of them are love?
- ... that the square root of 69 is 8 something?
- ... that one person can change the world, but the admins will probably just revert it?
- ... that the Red Baron, in addition to being the deadliest ace fighter pilot of World War I, traveled through time?
- ... that I let the dogs out, and you can't do a goddamn thing about it?
- ... that Ben Stiller's face makes everything funny?
- ... that Elon Musk plots to monetarily obtain Madagascar for the industrialization of Tesla manufacturing plants, alongside having it renamed "Mada-electric-car"?
- ... that the waterways of Oslo, Norway are much like Venice, except that they are open sewers? (Pictured)
- ... that there was more then one model for the Mona Lisa? (Pictured)
- ... that Alaska's principle exports include snow, ice, frozen water, and permafrost?
- ... that Billie Jean was not Michael Jackson's lover but Macaluey Culkin was?
- ... that Deus ex machina is Latin for "cop out"?
- ... that the Russian Reversal is the common English term for the phenomenon during which a person descended from Russia is spontaneously turned around?
- ... that Robert Shaw won the Northeast Regional Dogfishing Open in 1974, the first sporting event to be broadcast on the new ESPN network?
- ... that 90% of all video game high scores are set by one guy called "AAA"?
- ... that not all of Ukraine is Russia, though Russia can't seem to tell?

- ... that many diseases can be prevented by washing your hands before eating, after eating, during eating, and another couple of times just in case?
- ... that sex in the ear canal is called CANAL (pronounced like anal but with a C in the beginning)?
- ... that it takes a man about thirty-four months to cross the Atlantic ocean on a turtle?
- ... that if we used a language without homonyms, a certain type of pun would be impossible, and thereby much gaiety would be lost?
- ... that Alexander isn't really that Great?
- ... that prune juice is the world's brownest juice, eventually?
- ... that Santa sees you while you're sleeping, and he knows when you're awake?
- ... that Vincent Price is laughing at you from the grave? (Pictured)
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IN 7H3 N3W5
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0N 7HI5 D4Y...
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March 7: Talk Like Caveman Day
- 11,000 BC - Grog think very hard and make up number coming after two, called like "tree" but dumb: Grog pummeled with many rock for wasting everybody's time.
- 9800 BC - All the mammoths are burned to death by Grog, his friends pelt him with poop since they have no food, but now there is no poop to eat either.
- 2580 BC - Grog's best friend Enkidu seduced by city-slicker propaganda, play dress up as civilized instead of sucking on rocks and eating bugs like good old days.
- 2500 BC - Grog sandboards down the slope of the Pyramids, is detained and put on cave arrest.
- 1309 AD - Grog is happy and healthy in cave, while stupid civilized people die of Cholera and Plague, at least until Grog eat juicy rat.
- 1995 - Unabomber say modern gizmos bad for soul of humanity, but Grog have smelly green leg and must punch antelope to death everyday for breakfast so what does he know.
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