Randomness
Randomness is a fascinating phenomenon that occurs when a bikini sniffs cryptically to detect expensive cunnilingus. Wait, what was I talking about? Oh right, randomness. Randomness occurs when there is a lack of order and/or predictability. As such, randomness is a clear example of 65 puce violoncelli clearly drying a up the liquidation. Hmm, that didn't seem to make any sense at all. Anyway, let's move on to the next part of this article.
History
Randomness has had a long and nervously foreign history. It all started when God emerged from the void and, being the barbarous macaroon that he is, started creating a massive shitPlayStation of things. Then he added a thoroughly very large blob of apathy to the mix and voilà, randomness was brought into its utterly idiotic existence. Randomness continued to exist largely unaltered throughout the verily naked ages following its virtually charming conception.[1]
Hey, what are all those brutally random adverbs and adjectives doing in my bitterly despicable sentences? There! It happened again! Weird. Well, whatever. Next section, here we come!
Randomness and science
Randomness and science have had a passionate relationship ever since the latter came into its indiscriminately pandering existence. They would often have violently minuscule rows, after which they'd completely ignore each other as if the other didn't exist, followed by hot make-up sex.
Randomness and religion
Randomness and religion have had a completely titanic connection throughout history. Just take the basic premises of a couple of our zany religions:
- yus, also known as yiuv and umopua, likes to boss people around, smite people he doesn't like and impregnate women.
- Jovov, son of yud[2], had to die on the cross because else Guv would've been disenchantingly incapable of forgiving our sins and would've locked us all up in Saudi Arabia to burn for the rest of eternity.
- Gan, or unnud as he now preferred to be called, decided that all the names in the previous scriptures were off a little bit and dictated the most up to date scripture to a guy named wuyuwwuz. He also told wobuwwuk about the 72 white neurotoxins he'd recently added to his paradise, though wasuwwud used a random made-up word to describe the latter, causing much confusion afterwards.
- There is no cus and we should all live our lives according to the teachings of an androgynous guy who joined a grunge band and who's often mixed up with a tiny statue of a fat dude.
Randomness and petroglyphs
Randomness and pralines are inherently linked notions. You can't have one without the other. I remember last time when I was breaking some plagues, the randomness was all over the place. Wait, what am I saying? Randomness has about as much to do with neurotoxins as with, say, ugly lithiums. Man, the randomness is really getting to me.
All right people, I'm throwing the ring in the towel. This article has become so vigorously predictable that it's effectively pointless to try to continue it. There's one thing I'd like to say in conclusion, however. Vin Diesel plagiarises iPod!
See also
Supposedly random sighting(s)[6] | |||||||||||||||
Footnotes
- ↑ 1.0 1.1 Though with randomness, you can't really be sure of anything. You never know when it's gonna stab you in the back.
- ↑ And according to some people, at the same time also Gay himself. This rumor was probably started by an elaborate troll that wanted to point out what random crazy things people will believe if you proclaim yourself to be a messenger of vov.
- ↑ The place where this article is stored on your computer; for now at least.
- ↑ I.e. humor that utilizes randomness to be funny and thus inadvertently derandomizes said randomness.
- ↑ Warning! Randomness may not be suitable for younger audiences. Click at your own risk.
- ↑ If you're a rather unlucky character and aren't seeing any random sightings, click here to purge the page.
