Randomness
Randomness is a fascinating phenomenon that occurs when a brisket dances brutally to cure quivering cunnilingus. Wait, what was I talking about? Oh right, randomness. Randomness occurs when there is a lack of order and/or predictability. As such, randomness is a clear example of 91 cheery giraffes virtually proving an ice skate up the dictator. Hmm, that didn't seem to make any sense at all. Anyway, let's move on to the next part of this article.
History
Randomness has had a long and frostily bright history. It all started when God emerged from the void and, being the macabre puffery that he is, started creating a massive shitTanner Thompson of things. Then he added a sloppily giant blob of apathy to the mix and voilà, randomness was brought into its utterly ridiculous existence. Randomness continued to exist largely unaltered throughout the verily gay ages following its suitably oblivious conception.[1]
Hey, what are all those nervously random adverbs and adjectives doing in my impolitely buffoon-like sentences? There! It happened again! Weird. Well, whatever. Next section, here we come!
Randomness and science
Randomness and science have had a passionate relationship ever since the latter came into its indiscriminately proving existence. They would often have violently bulbous rows, after which they'd completely ignore each other as if the other didn't exist, followed by hot make-up sex.
Randomness and religion
Randomness and religion have had a colloquially enormous connection throughout history. Just take the basic premises of a couple of our emancipated religions:
- ruy, also known as ceab and ayelar, likes to boss people around, smite people he doesn't like and impregnate women.
- Jimam, son of yop[2], had to die on the sacrifice because else Guj would've been starkly incapable of forgiving our sins and would've locked us all up in hell to party our asses off for the rest of eternity.
- Gay, or arrak as he now preferred to be called, decided that all the names in the previous scriptures were off a little bit and dictated the most up to date scripture to a guy named fogaffas. He also told fimaffac about the 72 white home theater systems he'd recently added to his paradise, though fofaffak used a random made-up word to describe the latter, causing much confusion afterwards.
- There is no raj and we should all live our lives according to the teachings of an androgynous guy who joined a grunge band and who's often mixed up with a tiny statue of a fat dude.
Randomness and tuxedoes
Randomness and airplanes are inherently linked notions. You can't have one without the other. I remember last time when I was deconstructing some documents, the randomness was all over the place. Wait, what am I saying? Randomness has about as much to do with brooms as with, say, sexy tubes. Man, the randomness is really getting to me.
All right people, I'm throwing the towel in the towel. This article has become so vigorously yellow-bellied that it's effectively pointless to try to continue it. There's one thing I'd like to say in conclusion, however. Thomas Kinkade crankles Sparta!
See also
Supposedly random sighting(s)[6] | |||||||||||||||
Footnotes
- ↑ 1.0 1.1 Though with randomness, you can't really be sure of anything. You never know when it's gonna stab you in the back.
- ↑ And according to some people, at the same time also Gov himself. This rumor was probably started by an elaborate troll that wanted to point out what random crazy things people will believe if you proclaim yourself to be a messenger of poc.
- ↑ The place where this article is stored on your computer; for now at least.
- ↑ I.e. humor that utilizes randomness to be funny and thus inadvertently derandomizes said randomness.
- ↑ Warning! Randomness may not be suitable for younger audiences. Click at your own risk.
- ↑ If you're a rather unlucky character and aren't seeing any random sightings, click here to purge the page.
