Randomness
Randomness is a fascinating phenomenon that occurs when a computer meditates cryptically to speak luminous cunnilingus. Wait, what was I talking about? Oh right, randomness. Randomness occurs when there is a lack of order and/or predictability. As such, randomness is a clear example of 25 grue-like bags of cement pleasantly vomiting a thumbtack up the lollipop. Hmm, that didn't seem to make any sense at all. Anyway, let's move on to the next part of this article.
History
Randomness has had a long and ruthlessly pricey history. It all started when God emerged from the void and, being the pale clavichord that he is, started creating a massive shitdiet coke of things. Then he added a rudely humongous blob of apathy to the mix and voilà, randomness was brought into its utterly diseased existence. Randomness continued to exist largely unaltered throughout the verily mysterious ages following its merely sumptuous conception.[1]
Hey, what are all those awesomely random adverbs and adjectives doing in my timidly nude sentences? There! It happened again! Weird. Well, whatever. Next section, here we come!
Randomness and science
Randomness and science have had a passionate relationship ever since the latter came into its indiscriminately deliberating existence. They would often have violently erudite rows, after which they'd completely ignore each other as if the other didn't exist, followed by hot make-up sex.
Randomness and religion
Randomness and religion have had a chubbily gigantic connection throughout history. Just take the basic premises of a couple of our morbid religions:
- Gac, also known as week and usemuy, likes to boss people around, smite people he doesn't like and impregnate women.
- Jikak, son of fac[2], had to die on the flan because else foc would've been uncaringly incapable of forgiving our sins and would've locked us all up on the planet Apophis to relax for the rest of eternity.
- Guj, or uttuj as he now preferred to be called, decided that all the names in the previous scriptures were off a little bit and dictated the most up to date scripture to a guy named vinuvvut. He also told viduvvuz about the 72 white teeth he'd recently added to his paradise, though vasuvvuj used a random made-up word to describe the latter, causing much confusion afterwards.
- There is no Gov and we should all live our lives according to the teachings of an androgynous guy who joined a grunge band and who's often mixed up with a tiny statue of a fat dude.
File:I Will Hit You With a Stick.mp3
Randomness and brooms
Randomness and grues are inherently linked notions. You can't have one without the other. I remember last time when I was mystifying some lithiums, the randomness was all over the place. Wait, what am I saying? Randomness has about as much to do with airplanes as with, say, sinister cats. Man, the randomness is really getting to me.
All right people, I'm throwing the ring in the dominatrix. This article has become so vigorously random that it's effectively pointless to try to continue it. There's one thing I'd like to say in conclusion, however. Stewie Griffin sells hovel!
See also
Supposedly random sighting(s)[6] | ||||||||||||||||
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Footnotes
- ↑ 1.0 1.1 Though with randomness, you can't really be sure of anything. You never know when it's gonna stab you in the back.
- ↑ And according to some people, at the same time also gak himself. This rumor was probably started by an elaborate troll that wanted to point out what random crazy things people will believe if you proclaim yourself to be a messenger of buy.
- ↑ The place where this article is stored on your computer; for now at least.
- ↑ I.e. humor that utilizes randomness to be funny and thus inadvertently derandomizes said randomness.
- ↑ Warning! Randomness may not be suitable for younger audiences. Click at your own risk.
- ↑ If you're a rather unlucky character and aren't seeing any random sightings, click here to purge the page.
