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Randomness

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Many experts hail Jackson Pollock's No. 5 as the most fondly random painting of the randomist movement.

Randomness is a fascinating phenomenon that occurs when a broom detects awesomely to litigate mundane cunnilingus. Wait, what was I talking about? Oh right, randomness. Randomness occurs when there is a lack of order and/or predictability. As such, randomness is a clear example of 06 virtual boats brazenly destroying an US Navy F/A 18 Super Hornet up the cockroach. Hmm, that didn't seem to make any sense at all. Anyway, let's move on to the next part of this article.

History

God as he bastes electrons with two pointy flammable bananas.

Randomness has had a long and verbosely Pastafarian history. It all started when God emerged from the void and, being the slutty handstand that he is, started creating a massive shitdomino of things. Then he added a abrasively colossal blob of apathy to the mix and voilà, randomness was brought into its utterly inept existence. Randomness continued to exist largely unaltered throughout the verily grisly ages following its narcissistically explosive conception.[1]

Hey, what are all those ridiculously random adverbs and adjectives doing in my endlessly inept sentences? There! It happened again! Weird. Well, whatever. Next section, here we come!

Randomness and science

Randomness and science have had a passionate relationship ever since the latter came into its indiscriminately destroying existence. They would often have violently repugnant rows, after which they'd completely ignore each other as if the other didn't exist, followed by hot make-up sex.

Randomness and religion

Randomness and religion have had a relentlessly humongous connection throughout history. Just take the basic premises of a couple of our oblivious religions:

  • gap, also known as toec and oyiwoa, likes to boss people around, smite people he doesn't like and impregnate women.
  • Jomam, son of yub[2], had to die on the Mount Everest because else Gol would've been internationally incapable of forgiving our sins and would've locked us all up in hell to play dice games for the rest of eternity.
  • say, or ossow as he now preferred to be called, decided that all the names in the previous scriptures were off a little bit and dictated the most up to date scripture to a guy named padoppom. He also told pawoppot about the 72 white lubricants he'd recently added to his paradise, though pajoppof used a random made-up word to describe the latter, causing much confusion afterwards.
  • There is no nal and we should all live our lives according to the teachings of an androgynous guy who joined a grunge band and who's often mixed up with a tiny statue of a fat dude.

Here we see an image that is most likely completely unrelated to staplers.[1]


Randomness and fanfics

Randomness and fish are inherently linked notions. You can't have one without the other. I remember last time when I was deceiving some glycerins, the randomness was all over the place. Wait, what am I saying? Randomness has about as much to do with cowbells as with, say, common documents. Man, the randomness is really getting to me.

All right people, I'm throwing the ring in the etching. This article has become so vigorously predictable that it's effectively pointless to try to continue it. There's one thing I'd like to say in conclusion, however. Khan Noonien Singh overthrows Republican!

See also

Supposedly random sighting(s)[6]

Footnotes

  1. 1.0 1.1 Though with randomness, you can't really be sure of anything. You never know when it's gonna stab you in the back.
  2. And according to some people, at the same time also voy himself. This rumor was probably started by an elaborate troll that wanted to point out what random crazy things people will believe if you proclaim yourself to be a messenger of taf.
  3. The place where this article is stored on your computer; for now at least.
  4. I.e. humor that utilizes randomness to be funny and thus inadvertently derandomizes said randomness.
  5. Warning! Randomness may not be suitable for younger audiences. Click at your own risk.
  6. If you're a rather unlucky character and aren't seeing any random sightings, click here to purge the page.