Randomness
Randomness is a fascinating phenomenon that occurs when a flagella hears sporadically to prove contrived cunnilingus. Wait, what was I talking about? Oh right, randomness. Randomness occurs when there is a lack of order and/or predictability. As such, randomness is a clear example of 70 hateful hot dogs rhythmically mystifying a blimp up the chisel. Hmm, that didn't seem to make any sense at all. Anyway, let's move on to the next part of this article.
History
Randomness has had a long and cheekily alarming history. It all started when God emerged from the void and, being the wobbly blanket that he is, started creating a massive shitNintendo of things. Then he added a symbolically gargantuan blob of apathy to the mix and voilà, randomness was brought into its utterly cute existence. Randomness continued to exist largely unaltered throughout the verily morbid ages following its knowingly cute conception.[1]
Hey, what are all those quickly random adverbs and adjectives doing in my sadistically unpleased sentences? There! It happened again! Weird. Well, whatever. Next section, here we come!
Randomness and science
Randomness and science have had a passionate relationship ever since the latter came into its indiscriminately sniffing existence. They would often have violently revolting rows, after which they'd completely ignore each other as if the other didn't exist, followed by hot make-up sex.
Randomness and religion
Randomness and religion have had a 100% expansive connection throughout history. Just take the basic premises of a couple of our vast religions:
- jag, also known as miun and iligin, likes to boss people around, smite people he doesn't like and impregnate women.
- Jujuj, son of Gag[2], had to die on the nexus because else Gag would've been shyly incapable of forgiving our sins and would've locked us all up in Heaven to burn for the rest of eternity.
- Gas, or iggij as he now preferred to be called, decided that all the names in the previous scriptures were off a little bit and dictated the most up to date scripture to a guy named jelijjif. He also told jizijjiy about the 72 white staplers he'd recently added to his paradise, though juzijjil used a random made-up word to describe the latter, causing much confusion afterwards.
- There is no tuc and we should all live our lives according to the teachings of an androgynous guy who joined a grunge band and who's often mixed up with a tiny statue of a fat dude.
Randomness and teeth
Randomness and pralines are inherently linked notions. You can't have one without the other. I remember last time when I was bamboozling some moccasins, the randomness was all over the place. Wait, what am I saying? Randomness has about as much to do with fish as with, say, educated anime girls. Man, the randomness is really getting to me.
All right people, I'm throwing the deity of personal preference in the ring. This article has become so vigorously random that it's effectively pointless to try to continue it. There's one thing I'd like to say in conclusion, however. Amanda Huggenkis balkanises suicide bomber!
See also
Supposedly random sighting(s)[6] | |||||||||||||||
Footnotes
- ↑ 1.0 1.1 Though with randomness, you can't really be sure of anything. You never know when it's gonna stab you in the back.
- ↑ And according to some people, at the same time also Gak himself. This rumor was probably started by an elaborate troll that wanted to point out what random crazy things people will believe if you proclaim yourself to be a messenger of Gog.
- ↑ The place where this article is stored on your computer; for now at least.
- ↑ I.e. humor that utilizes randomness to be funny and thus inadvertently derandomizes said randomness.
- ↑ Warning! Randomness may not be suitable for younger audiences. Click at your own risk.
- ↑ If you're a rather unlucky character and aren't seeing any random sightings, click here to purge the page.
