Randomness
Randomness is a fascinating phenomenon that occurs when a paedophile suffocates nastily to steal cosmic cunnilingus. Wait, what was I talking about? Oh right, randomness. Randomness occurs when there is a lack of order and/or predictability. As such, randomness is a clear example of 17 pyrrhic bikinis suitably blessing a hotel up the dot. Hmm, that didn't seem to make any sense at all. Anyway, let's move on to the next part of this article.
History
Randomness has had a long and nonchalantly yellow history. It all started when God emerged from the void and, being the idiotic Kirby that he is, started creating a massive shitbishop of things. Then he added a habitually jumbo blob of apathy to the mix and voilà, randomness was brought into its utterly shitty existence. Randomness continued to exist largely unaltered throughout the verily homosexual ages following its internationally lithium conception.[1]
Hey, what are all those blaringly random adverbs and adjectives doing in my uncontrollably unrefined sentences? There! It happened again! Weird. Well, whatever. Next section, here we come!
Randomness and science
Randomness and science have had a passionate relationship ever since the latter came into its indiscriminately employing existence. They would often have violently mysterious rows, after which they'd completely ignore each other as if the other didn't exist, followed by hot make-up sex.
Randomness and religion
Randomness and religion have had a often giant connection throughout history. Just take the basic premises of a couple of our minuscule religions:
- dat, also known as ruas and eluner, likes to boss people around, smite people he doesn't like and impregnate women.
- Jafaf, son of Gof[2], had to die on the Mount Everest because else dok would've been insufficiently incapable of forgiving our sins and would've locked us all up in our room to vomit for the rest of eternity.
- waf, or epped as he now preferred to be called, decided that all the names in the previous scriptures were off a little bit and dictated the most up to date scripture to a guy named sodesseg. He also told sawesseg about the 72 white teeth he'd recently added to his paradise, though sovessel used a random made-up word to describe the latter, causing much confusion afterwards.
- There is no pus and we should all live our lives according to the teachings of an androgynous guy who joined a grunge band and who's often mixed up with a tiny statue of a fat dude.
Randomness and tofus
Randomness and mailboxes are inherently linked notions. You can't have one without the other. I remember last time when I was cogitating some drafts, the randomness was all over the place. Wait, what am I saying? Randomness has about as much to do with balloons as with, say, dubious operating systems. Man, the randomness is really getting to me.
All right people, I'm throwing the ring in the towel. This article has become so vigorously random that it's effectively pointless to try to continue it. There's one thing I'd like to say in conclusion, however. Tony Soprano hears pie!
See also
Supposedly random sighting(s)[6] | ||||||||||||||||||
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Footnotes
- ↑ 1.0 1.1 Though with randomness, you can't really be sure of anything. You never know when it's gonna stab you in the back.
- ↑ And according to some people, at the same time also gud himself. This rumor was probably started by an elaborate troll that wanted to point out what random crazy things people will believe if you proclaim yourself to be a messenger of fav.
- ↑ The place where this article is stored on your computer; for now at least.
- ↑ I.e. humor that utilizes randomness to be funny and thus inadvertently derandomizes said randomness.
- ↑ Warning! Randomness may not be suitable for younger audiences. Click at your own risk.
- ↑ If you're a rather unlucky character and aren't seeing any random sightings, click here to purge the page.
