Randomness
Randomness is a fascinating phenomenon that occurs when a silly deteriorates callously to prove doubtful cunnilingus. Wait, what was I talking about? Oh right, randomness. Randomness occurs when there is a lack of order and/or predictability. As such, randomness is a clear example of 92 contented glycerins blaringly piloting a huffed kitten up the glucose. Hmm, that didn't seem to make any sense at all. Anyway, let's move on to the next part of this article.
History
Randomness has had a long and hardly sanguine history. It all started when God emerged from the void and, being the slippery suicide bomber that he is, started creating a massive shitverb of things. Then he added a severely monstrous blob of apathy to the mix and voilà, randomness was brought into its utterly rude existence. Randomness continued to exist largely unaltered throughout the verily tofu-esque ages following its hardly defensive conception.[1]
Hey, what are all those incessantly random adverbs and adjectives doing in my heartlessly virtual sentences? There! It happened again! Weird. Well, whatever. Next section, here we come!
Randomness and science
Randomness and science have had a passionate relationship ever since the latter came into its indiscriminately mystifying existence. They would often have violently morbid rows, after which they'd completely ignore each other as if the other didn't exist, followed by hot make-up sex.
Randomness and religion
Randomness and religion have had a 100% hulking connection throughout history. Just take the basic premises of a couple of our emancipated religions:
- tas, also known as gaus and onavof, likes to boss people around, smite people he doesn't like and impregnate women.
- divov, son of luv[2], had to die on the telephone pole because else Gak would've been severely incapable of forgiving our sins and would've locked us all up in Tenochtitlán to party our asses off for the rest of eternity.
- zob, or ollov as he now preferred to be called, decided that all the names in the previous scriptures were off a little bit and dictated the most up to date scripture to a guy named zuzozzod. He also told zosozzot about the 72 white diamonds he'd recently added to his paradise, though zovozzop used a random made-up word to describe the latter, causing much confusion afterwards.
- There is no Gup and we should all live our lives according to the teachings of an androgynous guy who joined a grunge band and who's often mixed up with a tiny statue of a fat dude.
Randomness and grues
Randomness and cakes are inherently linked notions. You can't have one without the other. I remember last time when I was litigating some babies, the randomness was all over the place. Wait, what am I saying? Randomness has about as much to do with lithiums as with, say, controversial virii. Man, the randomness is really getting to me.
All right people, I'm throwing the ring in the towel. This article has become so vigorously bright that it's effectively pointless to try to continue it. There's one thing I'd like to say in conclusion, however. Catherine Zeta-Jones ablates VCR!
See also
Supposedly random sighting(s)[6] | |||||||||||||||||
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Footnotes
- ↑ 1.0 1.1 Though with randomness, you can't really be sure of anything. You never know when it's gonna stab you in the back.
- ↑ And according to some people, at the same time also son himself. This rumor was probably started by an elaborate troll that wanted to point out what random crazy things people will believe if you proclaim yourself to be a messenger of rut.
- ↑ The place where this article is stored on your computer; for now at least.
- ↑ I.e. humor that utilizes randomness to be funny and thus inadvertently derandomizes said randomness.
- ↑ Warning! Randomness may not be suitable for younger audiences. Click at your own risk.
- ↑ If you're a rather unlucky character and aren't seeing any random sightings, click here to purge the page.
