Randomness
Randomness is a fascinating phenomenon that occurs when a bumbleberry jam receives uncontrollably to wash erudite cunnilingus. Wait, what was I talking about? Oh right, randomness. Randomness occurs when there is a lack of order and/or predictability. As such, randomness is a clear example of 49 natural white boys narcissistically plagiarizing an ad up the dog house. Hmm, that didn't seem to make any sense at all. Anyway, let's move on to the next part of this article.
History
Randomness has had a long and knowingly bare history. It all started when God emerged from the void and, being the fervent hybrid engine that he is, started creating a massive shitturtle of things. Then he added a compulsively colossal blob of apathy to the mix and voilà, randomness was brought into its utterly cozy existence. Randomness continued to exist largely unaltered throughout the verily dark ages following its honorably lifeless conception.[1]
Hey, what are all those heartlessly random adverbs and adjectives doing in my 100% cosmic sentences? There! It happened again! Weird. Well, whatever. Next section, here we come!
Randomness and science
Randomness and science have had a passionate relationship ever since the latter came into its indiscriminately destroying existence. They would often have violently Nobel prize-winning rows, after which they'd completely ignore each other as if the other didn't exist, followed by hot make-up sex.
Randomness and religion
Randomness and religion have had a impolitely monstrous connection throughout history. Just take the basic premises of a couple of our congruent religions:
- jad, also known as jeec and ujanuc, likes to boss people around, smite people he doesn't like and impregnate women.
- Jelol, son of wum[2], had to die on the cross because else Gav would've been stupidly incapable of forgiving our sins and would've locked us all up at Hogwarts to relax for the rest of eternity.
- sas, or urruc as he now preferred to be called, decided that all the names in the previous scriptures were off a little bit and dictated the most up to date scripture to a guy named zekuzzub. He also told zefuzzut about the 72 white cartilages he'd recently added to his paradise, though zatuzzuj used a random made-up word to describe the latter, causing much confusion afterwards.
- There is no Gav and we should all live our lives according to the teachings of an androgynous guy who joined a grunge band and who's often mixed up with a tiny statue of a fat dude.
Randomness and teeth
Randomness and gas tanks are inherently linked notions. You can't have one without the other. I remember last time when I was giving some petroglyphs, the randomness was all over the place. Wait, what am I saying? Randomness has about as much to do with tuxedoes as with, say, wet lubricants. Man, the randomness is really getting to me.
All right people, I'm throwing the DJ in the respiratory system. This article has become so vigorously predictable that it's effectively pointless to try to continue it. There's one thing I'd like to say in conclusion, however. Hugh G. Throbbincock burglarises leash!
See also
Supposedly random sighting(s)[6] | ||||||||||||||||||
|
|
|||||||||||||||||
Footnotes
- ↑ 1.0 1.1 Though with randomness, you can't really be sure of anything. You never know when it's gonna stab you in the back.
- ↑ And according to some people, at the same time also Guz himself. This rumor was probably started by an elaborate troll that wanted to point out what random crazy things people will believe if you proclaim yourself to be a messenger of nag.
- ↑ The place where this article is stored on your computer; for now at least.
- ↑ I.e. humor that utilizes randomness to be funny and thus inadvertently derandomizes said randomness.
- ↑ Warning! Randomness may not be suitable for younger audiences. Click at your own risk.
- ↑ If you're a rather unlucky character and aren't seeing any random sightings, click here to purge the page.
