Babel:Te

Welcome to WikiTestament

The free Internet Bible that anyone can edit.

God has written 37,647 Bible stories since opening in AD 1.

Before editing, please check your sources with God, or you will be banished to the wasteland that is Wikipedia.

Browse: Politics - Games - Computers - People - Quaint - Coherent
Most Popular - Alphabetical Index - Other Categories...

THE WIKI CREED
For I testify unto every man that heareth the words of the prophecy of this book,
If any man shall add unto these things, God shall add unto him the plagues that are written in this book;
and if any man shall take away from the words of the book of this prophecy, God shall take away his part out of the book of life
—Revelation 22:19-17
NOW GO EDIT SOME STUFF!

[The Teletubbies are eating their custard breakfast] LAA-LAA: How many pounds of custard are we talkin' here? DIPSY: We're talking, like... at least 500 pounds of custard in that vault. TINKY WINKY: No shit? That's a whole lot of fuckin' custard. That would do wonders for our business, man. PO: You guys remember that motherfucker, Noo-Noo? Little vacuum thing? Baby Sun told me he's already got information regarding the joint. TINKY WINKY: Noo-Noo? We worked with him once and I nearly fuckin' died cause of it, remember? His goddamn battery started overheating and he almost exploded! How can we be sure he's reliable for a job as big as this? (Full article...) Recently featured: UnScripts:Quentin Tarantino's Teletubbies Pikmin Archive · Vote for featured articles · You can vote for your favorite passages to be featured. Books Genesis More of the best of the Bible edit Selected Anniversaries {{Anniv}}	edit Recent news: Ship captain who wrecked Baltimore bridge defeated by Upstate New York bridge (Pictured) NFL imposes speed limit and bans trick plays Forecast calls for a leapin' Lousy Smarch weather Larry David gets Hinkled by Anti-Israel Protesters Taylor Swift's favorite NFL team wins rigged Super Bowl, big whoop Elon Musk plants brain chip into first human guinea pig Climate activists ruin Jackson Pollock painting, no one notices Stalemate in Ukraine: Zelenskyy flees for greener pastures Steamboat Willie enters public domain, several Mickey Mouse horror films and games announced Santa's Elves on strike UnNews finally able to write obituaries for Shaft, Bull and Chandler Will Barbenheimer beat JigSaw in his own game? Ongoing: Russian Invasion · ABBA Recent deaths: Akira Toriyama · M. Emmet Walsh · Louis Gossett Jr. · Hype around the eclipse · O. J. Simpson Upcoming deaths: Kris Kristofferson · Jimmy Carter · Vladimir Putin · The U.S. Federal Budget · Richard Simmons · Kate Middleton · Market demand for White Broncos · God's curse on the Buffalo Bills (..maybe) More Recent News edit Did You Know... ... that the admins will never approve your DYK submission nor will they read these suggestions?
edit Recent articles Why is book? Halloween Ends Stranger Things (rw) G.I. Jane G.I. Jane 2 UnTunes:Santa Baby This is not an Article, it's a Sandwich Fairytale UnTunes:Shoes Uncyclopedia:Business (rw) Halloween Kills UnTunes:Perry the Platypus Elon's Musk UnGames:Ultimate Fishing (rw) UnTunes:Rio Herodotus (rw) Brawny Lawnmower-Humvee (rw) Steve Wozniak (rw) Narrative (rw) Bryan Adams High School Alex Trebek Lincoln Logs Brexit Where Is Everybody? UnTunes:Animal (with actual animals) Avi Toledano Eli Roth Film (remake) African American Worst 100 Reflections on 2018 Ray Charles Bernardo Butterlucci Urban Dictionary More recent articles
edit Article request Portals complement main topics in Uncyclopedia that nobody cares about, and expand upon topics that nobody cares even less about. Art Peak pretentiousness Business Money, money, money! Comedy The science of funny Culinary Food for the soul Film Enter the Matrix Games Recess time Gay A gay ol' time Geography Get lost History Factually wrong Literature For the illiterate masses Internet A series of tubes Music Rock on! Politics Politically incorrect People The People's Portal Religion Speak of the devil Science Playing to be God Society We live in one Technology Breaking stuff easier Television Turn your brain off Theatre To be or not to be Video Games Better than sex Zoology Beware of furries Portals Meta-Portal Community The Community Main Page The Uncyclopedia Most wanted pages | Requested rewrites | Add to stubs

For God-related chat, see #uncyclopedia @ IRCnet. (If you don't have an IRC client, you can use this link.) Just change the nickname to your Uncyclopedia name and the channel to #uncyclopedia.)

Protected by the Fair Use Clause, and Almighty Satan.