User:Sockpuppet of an unregistered user/Vicious cycle

What is this "Vicious Cycle" and where can I find one?

First off, You NEVER want to find a "Vicious Cycle". If you absolutely NEED to know why, please note the word "Vicious" in the creature's name. And yes, it is a creature, that thrives primarily in the Gobi Desert. This is why there just do not seem to be very many Desert Nomads (I.E. Insane people that walk around in the desert, wearing several layers of long black robes, and that have probably had way to much sun), anymore. The "Cycle's" have been keeping their population politely under control.

Here we see a Vicious Cycle (known as the "Rain Cycle". Farmers have grown fond of this breed over the years, but Forest Fires loathe them, sometimes hunting them down for days at a time, typically in the dry, southern states.

It was in 1854, that the Cycles migrated to Europe, and went on mad, killing sprees, around the areas of current day Luxembourg. Because its Luxembourg we're talking about, this is completely unimportant, and will not be discussed any further.

However, it was in 1857, that the Cycles wiped the Luxembourgian's blood from their jowels, and moved into the rest of current day Europe. They created wide spread panic, tearing down trailers, street signs, the occasional traffic director, a few churches here and there, but worst of all, they even tore down the once world renowned "ExcitoEnterprises Cardboard Box Factory", which to this day is mourned on January the 3rd, also known as, "The day excitement died".

Few people were hurt though, as most of cycle's were still digesting the worthfully sacrificed Luxembourgians, but still, they pissed off many the cop (I.E. "Pig"), and a good amount of construction workers (I.E. Immigrants), and street sign cleanliness maintainers (I.E. Virtually Worthless), on their terrible rampages.

How can a Vicious Cycle be killed, Oh great Genius of all things?

They CAN'T!!! well, very easily at least. No, a stake through the heart won't work with these bad boys. If you are ever cornered by a Cycle, you should:

A. Run Like your wearing $20,000 nike shoes (probably won't work)

B. Invite the beast to a fake party (They'll probably catch you later, after they show up to the "party", and find only an old vacant house, and a heart full of grief and vengeance)

C. Disrupt its cycle

Choice "C" will have to do.

So whatever the creature is cycling, you should disrupt it, by shoving something in there that makes it wrong. For Instance, If its a "rinse cycle", throw some hydrochloric acid in their somewhere, because that will freak the clothes up pretty good, and kill the beast. Another example is, if the cycle is a by-cycle, through a stick in the spokes. This is also a good trick for people riding less deadly "bicycles" at the park.

Here we see a cycle that has been killed, either out of self defense, or by a ticked off forest fire. To see the details of its death, please enlarge the gruesome image. Those details could one day save your local church, stop sign, or fast food joint.

Any last comments, Oh wisest one of them all?

Yes, if you ever see or stumble upon a "Vicious Cycle", contact the authorities immediately, because in present times, they're nearly extinct, and the police want to know if their breeding program is working.