That time I was nearly raped by Devo during my sojourn in Akron, Ohio

They looked kind of likes this, only old and fat.

Dude, those guys were fucking huge. Like, WTF?

So there I was

camping in Akron, Ohio, doing my nerd thing with the Energy Dome and the de-evolution, right? Like, hardcore geek shit.

and fucking Devo

burst out of the plastics factory, musk all over the place, and instead of going for my dog, they make a Devoline straight for me.

so I pulled out my

knife and cut the shit out of them, and Gerald V. Casale tried to mount me! WTF?

I barely got away with a major sinistral external abrasion and a severed brachialis radial.

No, seriously. Devo nearly raped me.

See also

• That time I was nearly raped by a yak during my sojourn in Canada
• Devo
• Bob Dole