Fateful Findings
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Fateful Findings is a film made by Neil Breen in 2013. It was shown at an invitation-only bar mitzvah called "Numb-Your-Butt-A-Thon" in 2012. There were no survivors. After some minor post-preview editing, it was shown at an international film festival in Seattle called "Seattle International Film Festival" (yeah, some idiot thought that it was good enough to show at a film festival. Go figure.). It was released in theatres in 2014 (a full friggin' year late(!)). The budget was non-existent, and boy does it ever show. Neil Breen not only directed the film, but he also wrote the script, produced it, and even edited the stupid thing (which explains the poor photo-shop skills on the DVD cover).
Synopsis[edit | edit source]
Dylan (Neil Breen) finds some mushrooms in the forest and gets high on them thinking that there's magic in the air.
Cut to, like what, 40 years later (this movie is more forgettable than my math test) when Dylan gets hospitalized (for some reason...)
And cut to another seen he walks out of the hospital (HOW????????????????), meets his wife naked in the shower, and then he goes all government-hacker on their bums. The girl he took the mushrooms with shows up (out of nowhere!) and is looking for some "breen" (if you know what I mean.) His drunken friend gets killed by his wife, and in the end Dylan kills himself, and the president, and the Congress, and his famil — okay that's too plain stupid.
Acting[edit | edit source]
The acting is godawful. Every friggin' actor sounds lifeless and uninterested and wishes to get the bejeesus out of there (i know the feeling).
Reception[edit | edit source]
This movie is now considered a cult classic. Let that sink in for a bit. A CULT CLASSIC!; while YouTubers like ***name withheld to protect the guilty*** reviewed this film and detailed that it's not quite as bad as Santa Claus conquers the Martians. I beg to differ.
OVERALL[edit | edit source]
Never watch this film; if you don't, it will save you some brain cells (cause I know I lost some...).