Bohrium

Bohrium, ₁₀₇Bh

Bohrium
Atomic symbol	Bh
Atomic number	107
Physical properties
Melting point	Unknown
Boiling point	Unknown
Flavor	Very sweet and delicious
Appearance	Glows green because it's radioactive

Bohrium, pronounced Bohaerium, is a synthetic (meaning that it is in plastic) chemical elephant element in the periodic table, with the symbol Bh, and the atomic number $((187274327\div 1750227.35514)+\pi )-\pi$.

Bohrium is scientifically proven to be safe for human consumption, however, it may not be safe for saltwater crocodiles to consume, as they cannot digest it.

History

On Earth, Bohrium was first invented by Peter Armbruster and Gottfried Münzenburg in 1981. It was created by bombarding Peptol Bismol with accelerated Google Chrome. On Earth, it was named after Danish physicist Niels Bohr. It was supposed to be called Nielium, but a stupid idiot misinterpreted it and put its name down as Bohrium.

However, on Venus, it was invented on Friday the 19th of December, 3000,000,000 BC by King Bohrium the Great. This discovery lead the Venusians to escape Venus before the fake runaway greenhouse effect brought an end to their advanced civilisation. They now live on the planet of Proxima E.

On Venus, Bohrium was named after the aforementioned King Bohrium the Great.

It is a massive coincidence that both Earth and Venus named it Bohrium.

Overview

Bohrium occurs in all plastics and is the basis for plastic chemistry. It is very useful for running away from your problems, as can be seen in what the Venusians did. It is capable of forming meatallic bonds with all organic organisms, excluding saltwater crocodiles, and can give you superpowers upon consumption. It is a metal and explodes in the presence of heavy non-metal music. Its radioactivity makes it great for making radio masts and obtaining superpowers through consumption. The spider that bit the mysterious 'Spider Man' may have contained Bohrium in its venom.

Allotropes

Bohrium forms many allotropes, most of which are very useful; however, there is one that is very evil and should never, under any circumstances, be touched.

• The most common allotrope, good bohrium, makes you stronger but doesn't give you superpowers. This is because the molecular structure, a cube, makes it harder for the radiation to reach you.
• The second most common allotrope, super bohrium, gives you superpowers. It can give you the power of flight, for example, or invisibility. This is because the molecular structure of this one, a flat sheet, allows for the most radiation to reach you.
• The allotrope of bohrium synthesised by the Venusians is weak bohrium. It makes you very good at running away from all your problems that may or may not be your fault. The molecular structure inhibits brain function, as it is made entirely of bohrium ions with 24 extra electrons.
• Evil bohrium should never under any circumstances be touched, for it will either turn you into Adolf Hitler or give you a massive stage 5 brain tumor, nobody knows which one. The molecular structure of this one can be described as a dick shape. It is theorised that this shape is why evil bohrium is so full of hatred.

Compounds

There are very few compounds that contain bohrium. However, such compounds do exist. The most common of which is Venusite, which has the chemical formula Bh₁₄₂²⁴⁺Be₂₉^.

This compound is what the Venusians synthesised Bohrium from by isolating the bohrium.

Sources

Bohrium, in the form of weak bohrium, is mostly found in the form of Venusite on Venus; however, there is some bohrium that can be found on earth, in the form of good bohrium, and super bohrium deposits in the inner core. Evil bohrium can only be found at the center of stars, such as the sun, and beyond the event horizon of black holes. In all its forms, bohrium is a green glowing solid when at room temperature.