2020 presidential debate

The 2020 presidential debate was a shitshow wrapped in a dumpster fire wrapped in a train wreck. The 90 minute "debate" took place on September 31, 2020. Contestants included Donald Trump, Joe Biden, and the moderator. The debate took the form of a series of yelling matches with insults interjected into the yelling at random intervals. Every 15 minutes, the moderator switched the topic of the yelling. Topics included Trump's taxes (or lack thereof), the plandemic, and the donations accepted by Biden's sun from the queen of Moscow.

"yo Joe who's on dat list?" ~Trump

"just shut the fuck up bro" ~Biden

Trump and Biden records

The first topic of the "debate" was the records of Trump and Biden. Trump opened the debate by talking about his IQ, which he claims is "better than infinity". Biden, not willing to accept defeat, delivered a crushing blow by bringing up Trump's taxes, or lack thereof. However, Trump reveals that most of his net worth is actually negative money, which is money stored in foreign banks that actually counts against your net worth. He originally paid $36 million in taxes, but he also paid -$35,999,250 on his foreign money. The result was $750 in taxes. Biden then asked Trump where those foreign banks are. He was hoping that Trump would slip up and admit that they're in Russia, but Trump lied and said it's in North Korea. However, Trump dropped a whopper. He told the entire 730 million viewers that Biden's sun, Vladimir, accepted $3.50 in donations from the queen of Moscow. Biden quickly changed the subject, talking about how he will change the national anthem to heavy metal. Trump tried to insult him, but Biden was too busy headbanging to Slayer to hear him.

When Biden finished his air guitar solo to Angel of Death, he claimed that America would not be safe with Trump as president. Trump then told a lie of the highest calibre, saying that Biden would restore the individual mandate of Obamacare. (The individual mandate was a totalitarian part of Obamacare, stating that anybody who refused to pay double taxes in order to fund Obamacare could receive the death penalty.) Of course, that isn't Biden's plan. His plan is to plant a million money trees in order to pay for everything, but Trump is just so quick to lie about anything and everything, as long as it makes him look more tan.