User talk:Crazyswordsman/Contents

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This page contains profuse whining. Proceed with caution.
Contents without the *ahem* "funny". WHERE IS YOUR GOD NOW?

User:Anotherpongo/Talk:Contents (archive) W.T.F.

Basically, it's a page with a very large contents box. —Braydie at 23:56, 29 January 2007 (UTC)

I hate haet hat this. VFH! -- §. | WotM | PLS | T | C | A 23:57, 29 January 2007 (UTC)

This MAY be the most honest and complete article on the site. It has EVERYTHING that the title promises. -- Sir Mhaille Icons-flag-gb.png (talk to me)
Yeah, there's no "I WASN'T EXPECTING THAT" comments to be made here. —Braydie at 23:59, 29 January 2007 (UTC)
Actually, it has no real content (or content"s"), which makes it a lie. If it were titled One unusually long Table of Contents, complemented with not but 117 Section headers, all titled "Contents", maybe. -- §. | WotM | PLS | T | C | A 00:01, 30 January 2007 (UTC)
W.T.F. Still. I'm zombieninja666 btw lol.
Add to the Nonsense box, it fits in there. Still, made me smile. :) --14px-Stupcarp_for_sig.png» >UF|TLK|» 00:00, 30 January 2007 (UTC)
Done. —Braydie at 00:06, 30 January 2007 (UTC)

In total, the word "Contents" appears a good 266 times. Thought it needed to be noted. Maybe we need an audio of this, saying "Contents" 265 times (1 is on the {{Wikipedia}} template and would be discounted). -- §. | WotM | PLS | T | C | A 00:11, 30 January 2007 (UTC)

There are articles that make me ask WTF? in a funny way. There are articles that make me ask WTF? without the funny. And there are articles that make me ask WTF?, followed by the thought VfD. This belongs to the third category.... —Gnome Icons-balloon.pngSpacer.gifIcons-bomb.pngSpacer.gifSwitzerland …MUN F@H 00:15, 30 January 2007 (UTC)
I'll record the audio thing. I'm good at things like that. --General Insineratehymn 00:57, 30 January 2007 (UTC)
Awesome. -- §. | WotM | PLS | T | C | A 00:58, 30 January 2007 (UTC)
Done. But considering the page is protected, could and admin add it in there for me? --General Insineratehymn 01:25, 30 January 2007 (UTC)
LOL! Sounds like a cartoon character, the name of which eludes me. -- §. | WotM | PLS | T | C | A 01:34, 30 January 2007 (UTC)
Doing that part was easy. I just increased the pitch and speed of the audio and ended up with that result. I must say I'm quite proud of it. --General Insineratehymn 01:36, 30 January 2007 (UTC)
I don't like it, I think it should be re-done with a little more feeling. "Contents. Contents. contents. CONTENTS." HOMESTAR ME!!! TURTLE ME!!! t o m p k i n s  blah. ﺞوﻦ וףה ՃՄ ண்ஸ ފއހ วอฏม +տ trade websites 01:35, 30 January 2007 (UTC) 01:35, 30 January 2007 (UTC)
The thing I was trying to aim for was making an audio recording that is very annoying. Considering this recording is recorded in both a high pitch and very fast, I think you have the perfect combination for making anyone go insane. --General Insineratehymn 01:37, 30 January 2007 (UTC)
Haha, I know, and it's great, I was just kidding. HOMESTAR ME!!! TURTLE ME!!! t o m p k i n s  blah. ﺞوﻦ וףה ՃՄ ண்ஸ ފއހ วอฏม +տ trade websites 02:00, 30 January 2007 (UTC)

I don't get things and I am frightened by loud noises[edit source]

Nothing to do with this article, but I felt that it needed to be said. -- Mister Bunbury

I was gonna put content under all the ==contents== but it's protected. -zombieninja666

Random rant posted by an idiot who does not like this article[edit source]


Warningex.gif WARNING! Warningex.gif
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This section contains profuse whining by DiZ. Proceed with caution.

First off, this is a very stupid article. For multiple reasons all of which I will try to detail. To begin with, I shall start by listing all the things I find fundamentally wrong, perverted, unacceptable, unfunny, unfit, inappropriate, unjsut, and generally inexcusable about this page, which neither warrants nor deserves the title of "article", which is reserved specifically for those pages which meet the criteria for encyclopedic parody and uphodl the standards of our humble yet thriving community and the Internet at large. Now, the list:

  • This is jsut plain not not funny. How can anyone possibly look at this and laugh? It is a perversion, a squandering, and a disregard of Uncycloepdia policy unbeknownst and unseen since the respective catastrophe and horrible clusterfuck which are Fisher Price and Euroipods. Anyoen who thinks this article is funny deserves to be bludgeoned unmercifully over the head or groin, so as to prevent future threads of thought OR prevent future generations of said idiot's offsprings from infecting this already befuddled planet wiht their vulgar unworthy style of "humor" which most likely consists of nothing more than cheap Hentai and "your mother" jokes.
  • This article seeks to undermine everything Uncyclopedia stands for. This is a cathedral of humor, a hub for satire, a pentacle for parody, if you will. How can we, as upstanding members of an Uncycloepdic community, allow pointless drivel like this into our midst? Would you allow pedophiles or criminals into your neighborhood? I should certianly hope not, for the sake of your family, your neighborhood. Likewise, it is unwise to allow articles such as this to continue infecting the collective entity which is Uncyclopedia. What would this do, but destroy our way of life, our infrastructure, the very foundations on which we raise and watch over our metaphorical children (loving articles for which we tend and care), our metaphorical family (every user who has passed our hallowed halls with a thread of good will and conscience), and our metaphorical community (the populous of Uncyclopedia, that which we have worked so hard to uphold)? Personally, I think this is the absolute worst crime this article has committed. To remain falsely unhumorous in a Church of Humor is rude, but to burn it with the flames of crudeness and vulgarity are blasphemy.
  • Articles such as this are the worst kind of vanity. They are a vanity of humor. A sick, demented vision of that very core virtue we try to instill in every word, every letter, every paragraph of our framework, with every beat of our heart as we can muster. To come into Uncyclopedia, unkempt as this IP must have been, and thoroughly deviate from and destroy the path of righteousness we hath wrought from the toil of countless keystrokes and sweat and blood and tears, is a sickening, disgusting vulgarness and uncouthness which I hoped I would never have to see so long as I lived and worked on this undertaking, our greatest brainchild to date. I am thoroughly unsettled by what I have seen, and if you have any thread of dignity and self-worth, you would be too.
  • Finally, if this article is a horrible bastard child; the twisted product of one anonymous IP's sick vision, and the determiantion of a confused admin, namely our beloved Mhaille, who has for so long never erred on the side of wickedness or ignorance, yet whose recent actions concerning this article have prompted certain members of the Uncyclopedic community to question his validity as administrator. This is of course utter nonsense. Mhaille is one of, if not the best admins this site has seen, holding a place of honor among the ranks of such sysops as Famine, Sannse, and certainly a role model for our youngest admins, Braydie, Flyingfeline, and Zombiebaron, to which they may all aspire to be one day. I would hate to see Mhaille's image and reputation slandered by such a momentary faltering in judgment as this. We forgive you, Mhaille. And I personally hope you can find it in your heart to forgive Uncyclopedia for the wrongs it has conspired and committed against you, whatever they may be. Most of all, I hope We, as Uncyclopedians and brothers in parody, may recognise this episode as a precursor of further events to come, and that we may learn from it, so as Uncycloepdia never falls into the depths of anarchy and civil unrest that will certainly be the result of misunderstanding between the admin and non-admin sects, unless we learn to take such episodes with a grain of salt, and forgive each other - as family is entitled to do.

When disruptions such as this occur, such an awakening of fear and turmoil is stirred in our hearts that we must be moved to act upon our instincts and right this atrocious wrong as we see fit. I ask of only a few conditions and reprimands, and hope I receive full assistance, if not authority to carry out said goals, through the collective strength of all who have the willpower to see throught to the end as I do. My terms and conditions are:

1.) Immediately work to mend this unclean stain on our imaculate surface of satire. I know I use many metaphors, but the meaning is quite simple: we must get rid of this article once and for all, with such swift and decisive action as we can exert, and thoroughly cleanse Uncycloepdia of all records of this unsightly blemish. I call for an immediate unblocking of this article, so as it may be quickly VFD'd, with such necessary forcefulness as we deem suitable. After it has been thoroughly destroyed and Uncyclopedia purged of this most unholy impurity, I move we proceed to further, more aggressive action:

2.) Punish all who are responsible for this atrocity. Bring justice back to Uncyclopedia and ban the most unseemly, loitering, pitiful, unhappy, and ill-fortuned IP who brought it into his/her inconceivably blissful head to enscribe such a perversion of satire on our unblemished surface. He hath placed the pimple of adolescent humor on the smooth buttcheeks of baby innocence which is Uncyclopedia. You would certianly punish he who infected your child, would you not? How is Uncycloepdia any different. Whether you like it or not, Uncyclopedia is your child; the moment you clicked that "Create account" button, you signed an unwavering, binding contract, to whose duty you are entitled to fulfill wihtout hesitance. Your being here, reading this message, is sure sign of your commitment to Uncyclopedia and the bringing down of all who oppose and/or slander it. Now, as I have said, I do not believe Mhaille, or anyone else, is responsible for this, anymore than you or I are responsible for not seeing this herecy in the first place. I simply move we forgive ourselves and join together to deliver justice to this wrong-doer, in the form of complete and total bannination.

These are my only two terms and conditions, and I believe in their purpose and prominence as I believe in Uncyclopedia, myself, and His Majesty Ouroboros.

As a final conclusion, I shall say only this: events such as these have happenned in the past, and will continue to happen, unless swift action is taken. These propsals are not ludicrous, or impossible, or even impractical. They are for the sole benfit of uncycloepdia, its users, and our strong fellowship. I urge you to take notice, reflect, and act upon such reflections as you see fit in the name and well-being of Uncyclopedia. With every one of us working together, united, we can accomplish any task, right any wrong, administer any justice, and mend any breach in sacredness or sanctity. Please, take these words whole-heartedly, and make them your lifeline, your guardian angel, your guiding light through these dark times. With the Internet on our side, I pray for the future of Uncycloepdia, and the day which we can all stand together and say "This is our land, and we are proud."

In Sophia's name we pray, Amen.

--Señor DiZtheGreat Honor me! CUN AOTM ( Worship me!) (Praise me!) (Join me!) AMEN! 00:56, 30 January 2007 (UTC)

Comments[edit source]

Jesus, Diz, can you provide a summary for us? Man, that's long. --LordKaT
I'm not about to read all of that. And besides, I for one find this article quite funny; it's self-referencing and it's the closest thing to the truth as you can get. (Hey, it's a page full of "contents"!) --General Insineratehymn 01:06, 30 January 2007 (UTC)
What the hell is wrong with you people? Don't you want to be inspired? Don't you want to be moved into doing something righteous?! What the hell ever happenned to "in the interest of the community at large"! This is your home you're fighting for! Protect Uncycloepdia now, abolish this nonsense of an artilce! --Señor DiZtheGreat Honor me! CUN AOTM ( Worship me!) (Praise me!) (Join me!) AMEN! 01:09, 30 January 2007 (UTC)
I gave up on righteousness a long time ago. I worship Benson. --General Insineratehymn 01:16, 30 January 2007 (UTC)
You need to find Ouroboros. Then become an upstanding member of the Uncyclopedia community. --Señor DiZtheGreat Honor me! CUN AOTM ( Worship me!) (Praise me!) (Join me!) AMEN! 01:20, 30 January 2007 (UTC)
Ouroboros? What's that? Some kind of donut? --General Insineratehymn 01:24, 30 January 2007 (UTC)
Goddamit you know perfectly what Ouroboros is and is not. Final post of the evening. When I come back tomorrow, I better not see another doughnut joke, or so help me Ouroboros I will unleash such a fury as the pages of Uncyc have never seen. Good day, Sir! --Señor DiZtheGreat Honor me! CUN AOTM ( Worship me!) (Praise me!) (Join me!) AMEN! 01:26, 30 January 2007 (UTC)
I'm afraid I don't. Could you tell me what it is? If it's a donut, could you give me one for free? --General Insineratehymn 01:28, 30 January 2007 (UTC)
I very much like donuts, especially apple fritters, but Ouroboros doesn't look like an apple fritter. I'm hungry. -- §. | WotM | PLS | T | C | A 01:32, 30 January 2007 (UTC)
Insineratehymn, Ouroboros is not a fried, glazed ring of sugary, starchy batter, He is the Supreme Self-Cannibalising Reptilian Overlord, or did you just not read the article? And certainly, neither He nor His salvation are for free. --Señor DiZtheGreat Honor me! CUN AOTM ( Worship me!) (Praise me!) (Join me!) AMEN! 21:28, 30 January 2007 (UTC)
Does his salvation cost $3.99 with tax? --General Insineratehymn 21:30, 30 January 2007 (UTC)
If you're an Orthodox Ouroboran, yes. Otherwise you better find the light, and fast. And I don't mean that fluorescent bulb on the ceiling. --Señor DiZtheGreat Honor me! CUN AOTM ( Worship me!) (Praise me!) (Join me!) AMEN! 21:35, 30 January 2007 (UTC)
No, I'd much rather prefer the darkness. And stop trying to force your religion on me! --General Insineratehymn 21:40, 30 January 2007 (UTC)
Heyheyheyheyheyheyheyheyhey!! I will force my religion on whoever I please! So sayeth Ouroboros! So suck it up and find salvation dammit! If you don't, I won't get enough Conversion Points to qualify for that vacation in Rio...And dammit I'm tired of brazil nuts!--Señor DiZtheGreat Honor me! CUN AOTM ( Worship me!) (Praise me!) (Join me!) AMEN! 22:36, 30 January 2007 (UTC)
No! I refuse to find salvation! Ouroboros is a stupid and stinky turd-farter! That, and he sucks! --General Insineratehymn 23:19, 30 January 2007 (UTC)
Guys, please. Stop trying to convert each other. Insineratehymn is a Bensonist and a member of my Contents-related church, The Contential Church of the Dear Article Primo Uno, Contents, and DiZ is a hardcore pseudo-atheistic Ouroboriologist. Can't you guys accept your differences? -- §. | WotM | PLS | T | C | A 01:15, 31 January 2007 (UTC)
That's like asking a gay Middle-Eastern abortion doctor and a white Republican fundamentalist to just "settle their differences". Gimme a break; heathens like him brought this upon themselves. (Well, technically, Ouroboros brought it upon them, but you know what I mean!) By the way, Squiggle, there's this book I think you should read, it'll change your life...;-D Señor DiZtheGreat Honor me! CUN AOTM ( Worship me!) (Praise me!) (Join me!) AMEN! 21:21, 31 January 2007 (UTC)
Nuh-uh! You brought this upon yourself you infidel! I was just minding my own business when you came in looking for trouble. I simply fired back following the rule "Don't trouble trouble unless trouble troubles you." You troubled me, so now I'm troubling you. --General Insineratehymn 21:45, 31 January 2007 (UTC)
I didn't go looking for trouble; I just wanted to save your soul from eternal damnation. Is that so wrong?! --Señor DiZtheGreat Honor me! CUN AOTM ( Worship me!) (Praise me!) (Join me!) AMEN! 20:44, 1 February 2007 (UTC)
Yes. You attempt to force your beliefs onto others when you know they don't like it, and the ending result is that they will become pissed off at you. The fact of the matter is that there are people such as myself and Squiggle who really like this article, and you are making yourself look like an asshat ranting here on the talk page attempting to convince us otherwise. I like this article, and there are other people who also like this article, and you are just going to have to accept that. --General Insineratehymn 21:30, 1 February 2007 (UTC)
Your logic is flawed; your beliefs are inane. If I may, direct your attention to my first bullet point:


Besides, you haven't even given Ouroboros a chance. Don't knock It till you've tried It. You're just lucky I haven't punched you in the groin. yet. --Señor DiZtheGreat Honor me! CUN AOTM ( Worship me!) (Praise me!) (Join me!) AMEN! 01:51, 3 February 2007 (UTC)
I'm not going to give that gay donut Ouroboros a chance when you keep trying to force it down my throat. And besides, you can't punch me in the groin over the internet; there's no matter transportation feature. Finally, about your bullet point, all I do is point and laugh at your nonsensical ramblings. --General Insineratehymn 02:27, 3 February 2007 (UTC)
Ok, maybe I can't actually punch you. But if I could, you bet your sweet ass I would. And fine, I'll back off about Ouroboros. But I still think you should give Him a shot. Come to our church sometime; Tuesday is Self-Flagulation Day! That's always fun, especially for the kids... --Señor DiZtheGreat Honor me! CUN AOTM ( Worship me!) (Praise me!) (Join me!) AMEN! 16:52, 3 February 2007 (UTC) Oh, and my ramblings are NOT stupid.
I now direct your attention to this. --General Insineratehymn 17:10, 3 February 2007 (UTC)
Pffffff. Like I'm really gonna use your pagan "complaints template". Blah >_<. --Señor DiZtheGreat Honor me! CUN AOTM ( Worship me!) (Praise me!) (Join me!) AMEN! 21:48, 3 February 2007 (UTC)
Why not? Are you chicken? --General Insineratehymn 22:04, 3 February 2007 (UTC)
I eat chicken. --Señor DiZtheGreat Honor me! CUN AOTM ( Worship me!) (Praise me!) (Join me!) AMEN! 18:39, 4 February 2007 (UTC)
Come on, use my "complaints template". I dare ya. Or are you too much of a spineless infidel to do so? --General Insineratehymn 22:27, 4 February 2007 (UTC)
Fine, I'll use your goddamned "template". Don't see the point though, I've said all I need to. --Señor DiZtheGreat Honor me! CUN AOTM ( Worship me!) (Praise me!) (Join me!) AMEN! 23:52, 5 February 2007 (UTC)
Talk:Contents: Is it Talk:Euroipods 2: Electric Boogaloo? Only time shall tell. -- §. | WotM | PLS | T | C | A 01:08, 30 January 2007 (UTC)
Contents 2: Electric Boogaloo it is - David Gerard 12:31, 30 January 2007 (UTC)

Nerds![edit source]

For all you Contents haters out there[edit source]

I have made for you a template that you can copy and paste and fill in the blanks (see below):

Things I Find Funny:

  1. Not Contents
  2. [insert thing you find funny here]
  3. [insert thing you find funny here]
  4. [insert thing you find funny here]

Make sure to sign your name with four tildes, so that way I know exactly at whom to laugh. --General Insineratehymn 02:31, 3 February 2007 (UTC)


Things I Find Funny:

  1. Not Contents
  2. Ouroboros smiting non-believers
  3. My articles
  4. Ouroboros smiting believers who have disgraced Him
  5. Other people's articles that are not titled "Contents"
  6. Dane Cook
  7. Midget wrestling
  8. Midget boxing
  9. Ouroboros smiting angry midgets
  10. Yo momma jokes
  11. Babies drowning in pools of blood
  12. Yo momma's so fat, she don't get tattoos, she gets billboards. Oh, snap!
  13. Ouroboros smiting Insineratehymn
  14. People slipping on banana peels
  15. People slipping on banana peels and falling to their deaths down a fiery chasm
  16. Capuchin monkeys
  17. Burning heretic churches
  18. Your penis
  19. Knock-knock jokes that end in people punching one another in the crotch
  20. "Breasts", tee-hee-hee...
  21. Ouroboros smiting Benson
  22. Ouroboros telling a yo momma joke
  23. Ouroboros smiting non-believer for not laughing at joke
  24. Smearing public toilet seats with melted Snickers bars
  25. Not Contents
  26. And to some extent, elevators.

Hope that was informative. --Señor DiZtheGreat Honor me! CUN AOTM ( Worship me!) (Praise me!) (Join me!) AMEN! 00:04, 6 February 2007 (UTC)

/points and laughs in a mocking tone --General Insineratehymn 00:44, 6 February 2007 (UTC)
You know what? I didn't want to do your stupid list template thingy, so shut up. And where's your list, eh?? --Señor DiZtheGreat Honor me! CUN AOTM ( Worship me!) (Praise me!) (Join me!) AMEN! 22:02, 6 February 2007 (UTC)
I didn't feel like doing one. Why don't you ask me later? --General Insineratehymn 00:26, 7 February 2007 (UTC)
It's later, now. Go make one. --Señor DiZtheGreat Honor me! CUN AOTM ( Worship me!) (Praise me!) (Join me!) AMEN! 23:46, 7 February 2007 (UTC)
No, I don't wanna. --General Insineratehymn 00:23, 8 February 2007 (UTC)
I'm gonna sue for plagiarism. —rc (t) 02:02, 8 February 2007 (UTC)
Plagiarism? When did this happen? --Señor DiZtheGreat Honor me! CUN AOTM ( Worship me!) (Praise me!) (Join me!) AMEN! 18:36, 10 February 2007 (UTC)
The Original!rc (t) 18:40, 10 February 2007 (UTC)
There's a new kid on the block, and its name is "Talk:Contents". Euroipods is an old, semi-conscious fart with a increasingly bloated ego, and it's about time someone stood up and wrote a really unneccesary, long-winded speech about it...... --Señor DiZtheGreat Honor me! CUN AOTM ( Worship me!) (Praise me!) (Join me!) AMEN! 18:48, 10 February 2007 (UTC)
'Tis a pale shadow, my friend, of its honored ancestor. —rc (t) 01:31, 11 February 2007 (UTC)
Are you kidding? Contents is 100 times better than Euroipoods ever was! --General Insineratehymn 02:17, 11 February 2007 (UTC)
I actually agree with the sinner this time; Euroipods sucks Euroass. Contents is the new Euroipods minus the suckaciousness. --Señor DiZtheGreat Honor me! CUN AOTM ( Worship me!) (Praise me!) (Join me!) AMEN! 15:22, 11 February 2007 (UTC)

Things I find funny

  1. Contents, which makes me very happy and hysterical
  2. Stuff with a joke
  3. AAA AAAAAAA AAAAA AAAAAAAA AAAAAA AA AAA AAAA AAAAAAA AA AAA AAAA
  4. Racing stripes
  5. Cowboy hats
  6. BENSON
  7. Anything Squiggle writes

--Crazyswordsman...With SAVINGS!!!! (T/C) 21:47, 10 February 2007 (UTC)

This list is alright. --General Insineratehymn 22:15, 10 February 2007 (UTC)

protected?![edit source]

That is all. --zombieninja666

VFH[edit source]

I nominated this for VFH. God willing, it shall ascend to the stars. Actually, if there is a God, it should fail horribly, unless God is a cruel and gluttonous God with a bad sense of humor. VOTE! -- §. | WotM | PLS | T | C | A 01:30, 30 January 2007 (UTC)

Brethren of the Contential Church, Our Dear Article Primo Uno, Contents, has failed at VFH for reasons unknown. But we shall unify and renew our efforts a hundredfold until we can show those humo(u)rless hacks what's what! -- §. | WotM | PLS | T | C | A 04:31, 30 January 2007 (UTC)
(Or, we can take this as a sign that somewhere, God does exist and hates this article). -- §. | WotM | PLS | T | C | A 04:31, 30 January 2007 (UTC)

This article isn't funny[edit source]

Seriously, somebody explain to me why this article is funny. Just give me one reason, and if you can do that, then give me seventy more. Also, I am offended that my name is in the article, take it out now. I will be back in four months to make the same complaints. --Contents 01:38, 30 January 2007 (UTC)

  • "I love this article and would recommend similar - Arsey, USA "
It's simple: this article is the greatest thing to hit Uncyclopedia since Euroipods, and we all know how much we all loved Euroipods. You do love Euroipods, don't you? --General Insineratehymn 01:42, 30 January 2007 (UTC)
71 Reasons? See: [1] through [2]. Maybe even more, if you're daring. -- §. | WotM | PLS | T | C | A 01:43, 30 January 2007 (UTC)
Hey Rc, why the change of heart? I thought you liked stuff like this. --Wehpudicontok--Welcome to Vaporstory! 02:13, 30 January 2007 (UTC)
I need more time to spend on this site. Stuff happens so fast, I'm busy for a day and I could miss a whole flamewar. --Wehpudicontok--Welcome to Vaporstory! 02:09, 30 January 2007 (UTC)

No! This is the best thing on Uncyc since AAAAAAAAA![edit source]

I'm not kidding. --Crazyswordsman...With SAVINGS!!!! (T/C) 20:35, 30 January 2007 (UTC)

I would draw a larger comparison to Euroipods, but it's definitely AAAAAAAAA!esque. -- §. | WotM | PLS | T | C | A 01:01, 31 January 2007 (UTC)
I don't see the Euroipods connection. This is nonsense, Euroipods is a one-liner. --Crazyswordsman...With SAVINGS!!!! (T/C) 05:13, 31 January 2007 (UTC)
If we were to feature this, it would be funny because it's not funny. The same was the argument behind Euroipods. --Wehpudicontok--Welcome to Vaporstory! 04:18, 4 February 2007 (UTC)
QUICKLY! Someone go nominate Contents on VFH! We're going to keep nominating it until it gets featured! --General Insineratehymn 22:29, 4 February 2007 (UTC)


FEATURE!


What I find funny[edit source]

  1. Of all things, definitely Not Contents. Ack.
  2. Sir Uncyclopedia
  3. Uncyclopedia Zork
  4. User: DiZ
  5. Insineratehymn being crazy and trying to get this featured.
  6. You guys being crazy.

Marshal Uncyclopedian! Talk to me!

/points and laughs in a mocking tone --General Insineratehymn 12:14, 13 February 2007 (UTC)
/Points and laughs at Insineratehymn/ Marshal Uncyclopedian! Talk to me!
/points and laughs in a mocking tone --General Insineratehymn 23:34, 13 February 2007 (UTC)

What I find funny[edit source]

  1. Of all things, definitely Not Contents. Ack.
  2. Insineratehymn's stupidity
  3. Contents oddness with Insineratehymn
  4. Insineratehymn
  5. Insineratehymn being stupid

Marshal Uncyclopedian! Talk to me! 23:32, 13 February 2007 (UTC)

/points and laughs in a mocking tone --General Insineratehymn 23:33, 13 February 2007 (UTC)
/finds Insineratehymn very stupid to laugh
/points and laughs. That's right. Just keep coming back here. I can keep this up all day. --General Insineratehymn 23:37, 13 February 2007 (UTC)

What I find funny[edit source]

  1. Insineratehymn's stupidity
  2. Contents oddness with Insineratehymn
  3. Insineratehymn
  4. Insineratehymn being stupid
  5. Insineratehymn being crazy
  6. iStewie's sysoping.
  7. Contents, in a way
  8. Insineratehymn's version of laughing. So squeaky and stupid.

Marshal Uncyclopedian! Talk to me!

/points and laughs in a mocking tone --General Insineratehymn 23:38, 13 February 2007 (UTC)
I am rubber, you are glue. Everything bad bounces off me and sticks to you. Marshal Uncyclopedian! Talk to me!
Well then you're an awesome writer who gets all the ladies! --General Insineratehymn 23:47, 13 February 2007 (UTC)

What's "I find funny"?[edit source]

  1. Not Contents
  2. Seeing Contents on the VFH
  3. Not being able to tell if the audio for Contents was over or not
  4. BENSON
  5. AAAAAAAAA!
  6. <insert name here>'s inability to pleasure my dog

What I find funny?[edit source]

  1. Not Contents
  2. Voting against Contents and seeing it failing at VFH
  3. Not BENSON or, more properly, not bensonites
  4. Not AAAAAAAAA!
  5. Not Fisher price
  6. Not Euroipods
  7. Seeing an admin removing Contents from VFH (darwin rule, so sweet!)
  8. Not nerdish injokes, including Contents
  9. Did I mention not Contents?
  10. Besides Contents, lots of good stuff. Particulary, well worked articles with content.
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What I find atrocious[edit source]

That this article still exists. Seriously, someone fix this. Or did you not read my inanely long, unnecessarily drawn-out speech? I will give all admins an ultimatum: if this article is not thoroughly huffed, and all links to it deleted by the end of next Sunday, the start of the long-awaited Ouroborofest, there'll be hell to pay. I might even stop contributing for some moderately long period of time. Then how will you get by?! Without me, you are nothing! That is all. --Señor DiZtheGreat Honor me! CUN AOTM ( Worship me!) (Praise me!) (Join me!) AMEN! 21:34, 14 February 2007 (UTC)

If you find it atrocious, why do you keep coming here. No one is forcing you to read this article. --General Insineratehymn 22:01, 14 February 2007 (UTC)
There's nothing to read. I get the same effect out of hitting myself over the groin with an industrial-size can of alphabet soup. I just come here to preach my cyclical snake deity and whine. --Señor DiZtheGreat Honor me! CUN AOTM ( Worship me!) (Praise me!) (Join me!) AMEN! 20:29, 15 February 2007 (UTC)
Would you like some cheese with your whine? --General Insineratehymn 21:49, 15 February 2007 (UTC)
Yes, if by "cheese", you mean "ramble". --Señor DiZtheGreat Honor me! CUN AOTM ( Worship me!) (Praise me!) (Join me!) AMEN! 21:58, 16 February 2007 (UTC)

What I find atrocious[edit source]

That the Contents haters are flaming, and they can't do so in a way that's funny, ie the way Nin does it. --Crazyswordsman...With SAVINGS!!!! (T/C) 01:46, 15 February 2007 (UTC)

I'm not sure there are many people who take the issue seriously enough to flame about it. ;) —rc (t) 20:36, 15 February 2007 (UTC)
Yeah, I mean the article is bad, but it's not bad enough to make me wanna go punch a baby or something. --love, gustav talk at menope 22:47, 15 February 2007 (UTC)
That title belongs to Euroipods. --General Insineratehymn 23:07, 15 February 2007 (UTC)
No, I like Euroipods. Don't be hatin'. Why dem boyz be hatin' on Euroipods? --love, gustav talk at menope 23:21, 15 February 2007 (UTC)
'Cuz Euroipods is old hat, yo! --General Insineratehymn 23:24, 15 February 2007 (UTC)
Well sure it's old, but it was still funny. I can't see this article really being on an AAAAAAAAA! level. *disengaging from the conversation* --love, gustav talk at menope 23:28, 15 February 2007 (UTC)
Exactly. Yet again, Euroipods and AAAAAAAAA! weren't that funny to begin with. As I've said, there's a difference between clever and funny. but you gotta blur the line... -_- This article blurs NOTHING! Señor DiZtheGreat Honor me! CUN AOTM ( Worship me!) (Praise me!) (Join me!) AMEN! 21:55, 16 February 2007 (UTC)
Of course this article blurs stuff. Or can you not see it as your vision is blurred? lol, pun --General Insineratehymn 03:58, 17 February 2007 (UTC)


Note!!WARNING!!
Excessive reading of this article or its Talk Page may result in blurry vision, nausea, vomiting, and an uncontrollable urge to punch a baby. View at your own risk.
--Señor DiZtheGreat Honor me! CUN AOTM ( Worship me!) (Praise me!) (Join me!) AMEN!  18:30, 17 February 2007 (UTC)
If it causes those things then stop coming to this page. --General Insineratehymn 15:25, 18 February 2007 (UTC)
This could use some work. Har har har. Maybe the talk page is featurable. Marshal Uncyclopedian! Talk to me!
Alright, then go nominate the talk page for VFH. People did the same thing for Talk:Euroipods. --General Insineratehymn 20:13, 18 February 2007 (UTC)
Insineratehymn, I come here because I am appalled at the crimes I see committed on this article. Look, Squiggle just stole someone's purse! And the only way I know to stop this is by whining. That's how you get everything you want in life. :-) --Señor DiZtheGreat Honor me! CUN AOTM ( Worship me!) (Praise me!) (Join me!) AMEN! 16:36, 19 February 2007 (UTC)
Well whining ain't gonna work here. This article is not about to be deleted any time soon. Whining is not going to delete this article. And how dare you fabricate lies about Squiggle, you infidel! --General Insineratehymn 16:41, 19 February 2007 (UTC)
I saw him kicking sand in a little kid's face! We all do it! Hell, I just punched a baby! --Señor DiZtheGreat Honor me! CUN AOTM ( Worship me!) (Praise me!) (Join me!) AMEN! 18:00, 19 February 2007 (UTC)

Guys, enough with the drama. You're making Nin envious.[edit source]

He actually is personally appalled at this from beyond the grave. He told me himself. --Crazyswordsman...With SAVINGS!!!! (T/C) 21:39, 16 February 2007 (UTC)

  • I'm melting! MELTING! MEEEELLLLTIIIINNNNG! --80.47.0.111 20:50, 9 March 2007 (UTC)

Until someone provides a distinct and clever alternative…[edit source]

…the article is definitely staying as it is. That is all.— Lenoxus 08:44, 17 March 2007 (UTC)

Gah[edit source]

This is Talk:Euroipods run amock. --AAA! (AAAA) 02:39, 19 March 2007 (UTC)

Is there something wrong with that? ;] -- Lenoxus 06:46, 19 March 2007 (UTC)
No, it isn't. So long ast there's no Cabal it isn't. --Crazyswordsman...With SAVINGS!!!! (T/C) 04:47, 10 April 2007 (UTC)

What the hell is this crap?[edit source]

W.T.F.

Wow, man. This shit isn't even funny. User subpages like this show how low the standards of Uncyclopedia have sunk. What the fuck were you thinking? This is by far the worst user subpage on all of Uncyclopedia. Period. --Littleboyonly.jpg TKFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFCK Oldmanonly.jpg 00:13, 21 April 2007 (UTC)

Fuck you. Contents is funny. --Crazyswordsman...With SAVINGS!!!! (T/C) 04:43, 21 April 2007 (UTC)
You know, TKF, you might appreciate this more if you knew the back story. Personally, I love Contents. --Wehpudicontok--Welcome to Vaporstory! 19:02, 22 April 2007 (UTC)
For the record, I actually love Contents too. I was just trying too hard to make a bad joke. *flagellates self* --Littleboyonly.jpg TKFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFCK Oldmanonly.jpg 23:01, 6 May 2007 (UTC)

Thank you![edit source]

I was so disappointed to see that Contents was gone. It's good to know it'll live on. --Wehpudicontok--Welcome to Vaporstory! 19:03, 22 April 2007 (UTC)

Thanks. --Crazyswordsman...With SAVINGS!!!! (T/C) 01:44, 23 April 2007 (UTC)

Hooray for original Contents![edit source]

--General Insineratehymn 23:53, 24 April 2007 (UTC)

People are trying to vandalize this.[edit source]

NOBODY TOUCHES CONTENTS. --Crazyswordsman...With SAVINGS!!!! (T/C) 19:09, 25 April 2007 (UTC)

Not even convicts who live in cloth shelters? --Tepples 02:31, November 16, 2009 (UTC)