User:Zim ulator/Zimbat Scalamichci

That's not tobacco he's smoking.

“Bring me the cabin boy, and a bucket of lard!”

~ Captain Oblivious on Zimbat Scalamichci

Zimbat Scalamichci is UnNews senior White People Who Think They're Black correspondent. In the employ of Uncyclopedia since 2002, Zimbat began his tenure as cabin boy to Captain Oblivious, a post at which he both excelled and blew.

• Senior Spiritual Reengineering correspondent
• Senior White People Who Think They're Black correspondent