User:Up For Parole

17-G This user does not speak 1337 and believes it to be an embarrassment to language. Furthermore, this user desires the genocide of all 1337 speakers. 17-G

ah-N This user is a native speaker of Asshat. ah-N

cpp-L Thith uther thpeakth C++ with a really thexy lithp. cpp-L

de-E This user only speaks Deutsch because it was a required course in school. de-E

se-L Thith uther thpeakth Simple English with a really thexy lithp. se-L

du-A Yah meeht nawt beh abble tew undersvand zis usehr behkuz zey zpeek Dumbass whif und estreemleh theuck akzent. du-A

en-0 This user does not understand English (or understands it with considerable difficulties). en-0

fr-P This fucker speaks Français heavily laced with profanity that would make a fucking asshole sailor blush from all the g*******d blasphemy. fr-P

fh-F This user got an F in Fuckhead and likes their native language better (if they have one). fh-F

ht-G This user does not speak HTML and believes it to be an embarrassment to language. Furthermore, this user desires the genocide of all HTML speakers. ht-G

lz-P This fucker speaks Lesbian heavily laced with profanity that would make a fucking asshole sailor blush from all the g*******d blasphemy. lz-P

17-0 This user does not understand 1337 (or understands it with considerable difficulties). 17-0

MW-G This user does not speak MediaWiki and believes it to be an embarrassment to language. Furthermore, this user desires the genocide of all MediaWiki speakers. MW-G

pika-E This user only speaks Pikachu because it was a required course in school. pika-E

rh-3 This user is able to contribute with an advanced level of Random Humour. rh-3

sl-P This fucker speaks sign language heavily laced with profanity that would make a fucking asshole sailor blush from all the g*******d blasphemy. sl-P

ow-4 This user had once seen Oscar Wilde in a crowd from a distance and knows all his works and quotes by heart. ow-4

“If I could be anyone in the world (other than myself), it'd be this guy”

~ Oscar Wilde on Up For Parole

Who be I?

I be Dan, a mythical creature from the legendary land of England. I'm the kind of guy that will give you a pot of gold if you make it to the end of the rainbow. Age wise, I currently have fifteen years under my belt (as well as extremely well developed genitalia, but that's another story). I am a tool of the government. You are much better than me at everything, including arts and crafts and the guitar.

What do I do?

Nothing. Apart from writing pointless wiki articles. Which is how I arrived here. Did you know this site arrived first when I searched for "useless wiki"? I forget which engine I used. Probably not Google. Nobody uses Google. I predict it will die at some point in the near future, possibly of asphyxiation. I'm also a fortune-teller-in-training. Cross my palm with silver (or breasts if you happen to be female) and I'll make something up for you. I also write a lot of English essays (by the way, I don't speak English). My English teacher is a potato from the planet Mars. Yes, Ms. Smith, I'm talking about you.

What do I like?

Myself

When will I update this?

Whenever I have time. And by when I have time, I mean when I can be bothered. And by when I can be bothered, I mean never.

Pages I've Started

Adam Levine