User:Naughtyned/Not Michael Jackson
“It's not Michael Jackson and this is not Thriller!”
“I bet he's Michael Jackson........ naut!”
“It doesn't matter if your black or white, or if your a man or a woman, because I am none of them.”
A statement is considered "Not Michael Jackson" if in end result it does not (at least not directly) involve Michael Jackson.
Example:
"Wan't to hear a joke? Women's rights."
The previous joke did not directly involve Michael Jackson.
It is also did not involve humor. However not having a sense of humor is not essential to being Not Michael Jackson.
People who are Not Michael Jackson[edit | edit source]
- Me
- Michael Jack Schmidt
- Janet Jackson
- Michael Jordan (contrary to Al Gore's opinion [1])
People who are Not Michael Jackson in spite of their orientation (Yes, you can be gay and be Not Michael Jackson, as long as you're not a really annoying flamer.)[edit | edit source]
- Elton John
- Oscar Wilde
- Rock Hudson
- Freddy Mercury
- David Bowie
- Melissa Etheridge
- Rob Halford
- Lesbian Porn Stars
People who are on the borderline between Not Michael Jackson and not Not Michael Jackson[edit | edit source]
- Barney Frank
- Ellen DeGeneres
- Harvey Fierstein
- Liberace
- Mark Harris
- Rip Taylor
- Charles Nelson Reilly
- Ben, the rat Michael Jackson shoved up his ass
People who are not Not Michael Jackson (or people Bea Arthur wouldn't fuck with Lisa Lampanelli's dick while simultaneously using Jefferey Ross, Greg Giraldo, and Nick DiPaolo as condoms)[edit | edit source]
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People who are not Not NOT Michael Jackson[edit | edit source]
Important Distinctions between Michael Jackson and Not Michael Jackson[edit | edit source]
Note that the best available information suggests that condensed milk and coconut extract are Not Michael Jackson, even though they are white and come in small cans.
When in doubt, a rule of thumb to determine what is Michael Jackson and what's Not Michael Jackson is this: Not Michael Jackson likes 28-year-olds, while Michael Jackson likes 20 8-year-olds.
Important Distinctions between Michael Jackson and Not Not Michael Jackson[edit | edit source]
See: Philosophy