User:Marto 85/Tony Greig

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Tony Greig AKA Pigeon-toed wanker (Got 'im Yes!), is a South African bawn man who captained England in Test Cricket. He is awrways seen wearing a funny hat, because he is bawld. He has a strong Afrikaawns accent.

Playing Career[edit | edit source]

Tony was unable to play for his native South Africaw because he was rubbish. Naturally, the Poms were eager to have him play for them instead.

Tony was an innovative borstard in his time. He introduced helmets (his looked like it berlornged to an astronauught) which made everyone a bunch of pussies. He is also rawther famous for his captaincy, like when he told the Windies he would make them grovel. The Windies just lorfed and thrashed the Poms.

The Commentary Team[edit | edit source]

Tony now commentates fawr Channel Nine's Wired Worwld of Sporrts. He awrways gets teamed up with Bull Lawry, and is awrways funny with that borstord in the commentary box, the two have clashed many times in the porst.

Tony Greig can be seen doing the forecorst and putch reporrt for Channel Nine's Wired World of Sporrts. He has an obsession with sticking his bloody cor keys into cracks in the putch, sometimes getting them stuck, causing havoc for batsmen. He is awrways wearing his hat, but once he went on air sporrting a rug with a ponytail, causing the Channel Nine crew to pray he "wouldn't get mobbed by the chicks".

As a result he doesn't like Shane Warrrrne much, because Shane Warne loves Advornced Hair Hats, the place Tony got his rug.

Quotes[edit | edit source]

“Right awff the meat of the bat”

~ Tony Greig on Cricket

“Right awff the meat of the... right awff the vegetable of the bat - I didn't say meat”

~ Tony Greig on his commentary

“Aw blow it out your awss Bull!”

~ Tony Greig on Cricket

“Tony, there's an old saying in television circles - If you ain't got the locks, you ain't on the box!'”

~ Richie Benaud on bawdness