User:EpicAwesomeness/Geography

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The geography of this location is stunning, wet and a bit dangerous if you slip.

Geography is the study of the Earth, rocks,[1] obscure villages, rocks and how long someone can go on ignoring the existence of extraterrestrial planets. Its main branches, physical and human geography, look at the autonomous processes of nature and how humanity bashes them on the head with a mallet, respectively. However, geography in itself is more concentrated on the overall properties and characteristics of locations and useless inanimate objects, how they apply to unrelated useless objects and things in that vain. Thus far, few people have seen its true purpose outside of annoying and confusing the sizable group of people who have discovered Google Maps.

History of geography[2][edit | edit source]

The creation, etymology and generally negative evolution of geography is an exercise in mundaneness, a sort of formal approach to uselessness. Geography originated in cartography, a far more useful subject, which is about maps; the pining urge of sea-weary Englishmen to document the land masses depicted on such maps let to a painful, at best, spawning of the modern term 'geography', used to refer to such frivolous activities. Its move from terribly unimportant adjective to terribly unimportant noun to terribly unimportant noun people are paid to examine is undocumented, although logic dictates that the third stage happened some time after all human morality fell off a cliff.

The etymology of the word 'geography' is as annoying as spelling etymology. The word is derived from the Greek geo ("earth") and graphia ("not involving graphs in any way"), as Greek philosopher Ἀναξίμανδρος "began" geography, and holds the record for being the target of the world's largest lynch mob. Since then, geography floated eerily through various cultures with no sense of rising prominence, instead being a continuous stream of high-class stupidity spat out at the world stage and hastily wiped away.

Types of geography[edit | edit source]

Human geography[edit | edit source]

Human geography is one of two major subdivisions of geography, which in turn spreads out into dozens of other minor topics such as culture, economy and politics, all of which have turned to shit since geography began looking at them. Overall though, human geography studies humanity and its relative effects, although biology called dibs on the actual human body, which is as infuriatingly pointless as it is infuriatingly annoying.

Physical geography[edit | edit source]

Physical geography is the marginally less obnoxious counterpart of human geography,

References[edit | edit source]

  1. The sedimentary petrologists can go fuck themselves.
  2. The two subjects you hated, together. Joy.