Aluminium

They said that I have to say some stuff about Aluminium (or aluminum), so here I go... I'm not the best speaker, but please bear with me on this one guys n' girls.

Isn't it shiny? Its also un-heavy! Cool right?

Properties of Aluminium

Aluminium is a metal which is not only un-heavy, but also stronger than steel, whilst being less heavy. Aluminium is however, not a light metal, as it is not moving at the speed of light. Therefore, it is not light, but rather, un-heavy. It is also shiny, and shiny means good, but I also think that matte is good, because it is like, not as noticeable, but when other stuff isn't matte, it stands out really nicely, like my Ford Mustang in Need for Spe... oh, sorry for going off on a tangent. Anyhow, it can be painted any color, except for orange. Also, aluminium has great thermal properties, which is why it is used in heatsinks, or cooling systems, as it transfers heat, or something like that. Did I mention that it is not light, but rather, un-heavy?

Uses of Aluminium

This magical metal, is utilized in the production of:

• Airplanes, as they need to be un-heavy, as airplanes are not supposed to be heavy, which would make the airplane sink due to the weight, and therefore, not fly.
• Aluminum foil, as aluminium makes for a stark contrast on the character displayed by steel, giving a dionysian counter, to the apollonian nature of steel, who displays an ovidian perspective, rather than aluminium's forward ideology.
• Cars, because cars that are un-heavy, are more efficient, and since the gas at Chevron is like, $4.52 to the gallon, it's insane man!
  

  It's so cool, this car is almost all aluminium! IT'S AWESOME!! Oh wait.. this is for informational purposes. Yeah, it's aluminium.
  You won't believe how hard it is to find cheap gas, save drilling for your own oil, and then getting it refined... oh I must be going on a tangent again... damn, gotta keep it together I should have taken my vyvanse....
• The Zune. Now, before you shoot me down for this, I just listed the Zune because it is made of aluminium, this does not mean I either like or dislike the Zune.
• Computers, you won't believe how many computers have aluminium components in them, or have aluminium cases. Ergo, I think that this is a very valid thing to list. For example, the heatsink in my computer has aluminium fins, which disperse the heat well. One failed attempt at using the properties on aluminium for a heatsink, is the Apple III computer. I mean, that thing had no ventilation! It was like, just a block of aluminium, I lol'd when I read about it... I think it was on a computer website, something like, worst 20 computers or something. That thing was fun to read. Oh DAMN, sorry for going on a tangent again, I promise, it won't happen again.
• Armor, I mean, since it is so un-heavy, yet still strong, I would expect it to be used in armor, as light, but strong armor is obviously better than heavy and weak armor.

This is the one I have, isn't it cool looking???

• Yo-Yos, there are many aluminium yo-yos in the market nowadays, I mean, not only are they better than the plastic yo-yos, but damn... they look cool. I have an aluminium yo-yo... wait I need to focus. Anyways, aluminium is also used due to its un-heavyness, and smoothness.

History

So, basically in the past, aluminium was about as valuable as silver, because mining it back in the day, as some people say (I'm a poet and I don't know it!), was extremely difficult, and silver and aluminium kind of look the same, so they could be interchangeable I guess. I think that the metal thing on top of the Washington Memorial, was aluminium, but then they changed it to silver, or maybe vice versa. I guess if they put silver on top, that would be stupid, because silver can oxidize and get tarnished and stuff. Or maybe they treated it with something. Anyways, when aluminium mining was simplified, the price went down. So, when the price went down, lots of stuff started using aluminium, and that made it much better, because the aluminium replaced the steel in some things, making said things more un-heavy. In fact, many things today have abandoned steel in favor of aluminium. But my opinion is that, even though steel is more heavy than aluminium, it is cheap. Plus steel sounds cooler than Ah-loo-myhn-e-um, right? I mean, what kind of metal has that kind of name??? Anyways, it is used a whole lot in today's modernized world, for all sorts of modern things.

Other Facts About Aluminium

• It is smooth when polished
• It tastes weird
• It's worse than copper for conductivity
• By the way, did you know that pennies aren't made mostly of copper?
• Its Zinc... or something
• Also, the penny is actually more expensive to produce than 1 cent?
• I mean, who would have thought?
• FUCK, I KEEP GETTING DISTRACTED
• FUCK THIS. I QUIT

 

Periodic Table of Elements:

 Make sure you memorize these for the test!

Alkali   Alkaline Earth   Transition   Basic

Semimetal   Nonmetal   Halogen   Snob Gas

Lanthanide   Actinide   Awesomnide   Unverifide

1H Hydrogen

2He Helium

3Li Lithium

4Be Beryllium

5B Boron

6C Carbon

7N Nitrogen

8O Oxygen

9F Fluorine

10Ne Neon

11Na Sodium

12 Mg Magnesium

13Al Aluminum

14 Si Silicon

15 P Phosphorus

16 S Sulfur

17Cl Chlorine

18Ar Argent

19 K Potassium

20 Ca Calcium

21Sc Scandinavium

22Ti Titanium

23 V Vanadium

24Cr Chromium

25 Mn Manganese

26Fe Iron

27 Co Cobalt

28Ni Nickel

29 Cu Copper

30 Zn Zinc

31 Ga Gallium

32 Ge Germanium

33 As Arsenic

34 Se Selenium

35 Br Bromine

36Kr Krypton

37 Rb Rubidium

38 Sr Strontium

39 Y Yttrium

40 Zr Zirconium

41 Nb Niobium

42 Mo Molybdenum

43 Tc Technetium

44 Ru Ruthenium

45 Rh Rhodium

46 Pd Palladium

47Ag Silver

48 Cd Cadmium

49In Indium

50Sn Tin

51 Sb Antimony

99Te Tedium

53 I Iodine

54Xe Xenon

55 Cs Caesium

56 Ba Barium

57-71 La-Lu Lanthanides

72 Hf Hafnium

73 Ta Tantalum

74 W Tungsten

75 Re Rhenium

76 Os Osmium

77 Ir Iridium

78Pt Platinum

79Au Gold

80Hg Mercury

81 Tl Thallium

82Pb Lead

83Bi Bismuth

84Po Polonium

85 At Astatine

86Rn Radon

87 Fr Francium

88 Ra Radium

89-103 Ac-Lr Actinides

104 Rf Rutherfordium

105 Db Dubnium

106 Sg Seaborgium

107 Bh Bohrium

108 Hs Hassium

109 Mt Meitnerium

110 Ds Darmstadtium

111 Uuu Unununium

112 Cn Copernicium

113 Nh Nihonium

114 Fl Flerovium

115 Mc Moscovium

116 Lv Livermorium

117 Ts Tennessine

118 Og Oganesson

119Un Uncyclopedium

120 Ub Unobtanium

121 Aeo Awesomnium

122Fa Fartium

123St Stalinium

124Ob Obamium

125Sl Stalloneium

-1SuStupidium

1/5Bm Brucium

1/2*Ch Cheesium

3/4Pl Plotonium

4.5Op Opium

∞Hu Homoerectium

57 La Lanthanum

58 Ce Cerium

59Pr Praseodymium

60 Nd Neodymium

61 Pm Pentium

62 Sm Samarium

63 Eu Europium

64 Gd Gadolinium

65 Tb Terbium

66 Dy Dysprosium

67 Ho Holmium

68 Er Erbium

69 Tm Thulium

70 Yb Ytterbium

71 Lu Lutetium

89 Ac Actinium

90 Th Thorium

91 Pa Protactinium

92U Uranium

93 Np Neptunium

94Pu Plutonium

95 Am Americium

96 Cm Curium

97 Bk Berkelium

98 Cf Californium

99 Es Einsteinium

100 Fm Fermium

101 Md Mendelevium

102 No Nobelium

103 Lr Lawrencium

Aluminum · Argent · Arsenic · Awesomnium · Beryllium · Bismuth · Boron · Bromine · Brucium · Caesium · Cheesium · Chromium · Carbon · Cobalt · Copper · Francium · Fluorine · Gallium · Gold · Helium · Homoerectium · Hydrogen (Deuterium / Impersonation) · Iron · Fartium · Kryptonite · Lead · Lithium · Mercury · Neon · Neodymium · Nickel · Nitrogen · Obamium · Opium · Oxygen · Parodymium · Platinum · Plotonium · Plutonium · Polonium · Radium · Radon · Scandinavium · Silver · Sodium · Stalinium · Stalloneium · Tedium · Tin · Unobtanium (Unobtainium) · Unununium · Uranium (Human / Depletion) · Vanadium · Xenon · Zinc

*Technically an atom of Cheesium has an atomic number of four (4), but that's only for the idiotic table.