User:DiZ/chess
< User:DiZ
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Archived games can be found on the Talk Page.
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Welcome to Multiplayer DiZ Chess, powered by Nintendo DiZ and Communism DiZTM
Here, you can challenge your fellow Uncyclopedians ME to chess games and pray that I won't take forever to move. If you have an aching desire to do something unorthodox and insane, just go here, and leave me alone. To start a new game, buy your own damn chess set copy this template below onto this page under a current game:
<div style="float: center;text-align:center;padding:5px;background-color:#F5F5F5;border: 1px solid #DDD">{{chessboard|img=gif|size=40<!--
-->|rw|nw|bw|qw|kw|bw|nw|rw<!--
-->|pw|pw|pw|pw|pw|pw|pw|pw<!--
-->| | | | | | | | <!--
-->| | | | | | | | <!--
-->| | | | | | | | <!--
-->| | | | | | | | <!--
-->|pb|pb|pb|pb|pb|pb|pb|pb<!--
-->|rb|nb|bb|qb|kb|bb|nb|rb<!--
-->}}Game #X /White: <player1>/ Black:<player2>
*'''Last Move:'''
</div>
Also, please observe the following rules, or die:
- The same rules of regular chess apply: no illegal moves, including but not limited to: placing your king in check, incorrectly moving your pieces, and/or bludgeoning your opponent to death.
- NO RE-DO's. This is a wiki, there's no rush. As soon as you click "Save Page", your move is final.
- Remember to specify who's turn it is on the main heading of your game.
- If you're a n00b and don't know how to play chess, leave. We don't want you fucking around here with the pieces, lest you poke someone's eye out.
- You can play in as many games as you want, but don't be an asshole about it.
- These games can take a while, be patient goddamit. If your opponent does not make a move for a long time, start a new game or something, don't whine to me about it.
- If you are uncertain about your move, use the preview button. For Christ's sake, use the goddamn preview button!
- Sign your name in the game's caption with 3 tildes ~~~ (no timestamp necessary)
Game #5: NeedABrain against DiZ (DiZ's Move)[edit | edit source]
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[scream!] Black:Señor DiZtheGreat 
CUN AOTM ( Worship me!) (Praise me!) (Join me!) AMEN!
- Last Move: NeedABrain (rook to d4)
Comment[edit | edit source]
- Diz, you didn't move your queen. She was already in that position, where she took the bishop. -- herr doktor needsAscalpel
[scream!] 23:12, 27 February 2007 (UTC) - Err, don't htink so. Check it closely: http://en.uncyclopedia.co/w/index.php?title=User%3ADiZ%2Fchess&diff=1635347&oldid=1635345 Besides, your bishops are still there. It's your turn. --Señor DiZtheGreat
CUN AOTM ( Worship me!) (Praise me!) (Join me!) AMEN! 23:16, 27 February 2007 (UTC) - No, I moved my pawn last time, after you sporking my bishop with your queen. -- herr doktor needsAscalpel [scream!] 23:18, 27 February 2007 (UTC)
- If you say so. --Señor DiZtheGreat CUN AOTM ( Worship me!) (Praise me!) (Join me!) AMEN! 23:21, 27 February 2007 (UTC)
- Are you crazy, man? I am the whites!... hehehe -- herr doktor needsAscalpel [scream!] 23:26, 27 February 2007 (UTC)
- Now I got it! You are playing the whites, numbskull! Reverted. Hahaha. -- herr doktor needsAscalpel [scream!] 23:29, 27 February 2007 (UTC)
- Ok, so it's my turn? --Señor DiZtheGreat CUN AOTM ( Worship me!) (Praise me!) (Join me!) AMEN! 23:31, 27 February 2007 (UTC)
- Yup. I've moved the queen back. -- herr doktor needsAscalpel [scream!] 23:32, 27 February 2007 (UTC)
- Great idea with the Last Move thing, NeedaBrain. Why didn't I think of that sooner?... --Señor DiZtheGreat CUN AOTM ( Worship me!) (Praise me!) (Join me!) AMEN! 20:27, 1 March 2007 (UTC)
- This game is annoyingly balanced. Good to see you play on my league, man. Yeah, we're no Deep Blues, but we're not junior class either. -- herr doktor needsAscalpel [scream!] 17:26, 4 March 2007 (UTC)
- This is anticlimatic, but I gotta go. See ya tomorrow. -- herr doktor needsAscalpel [scream!] 18:24, 4 March 2007 (UTC)
- Maybe I will lose, but not die from boredom. Shssh... I won the one I didn't started and I'm losing the one I started... Shame on me. -- herr doktor needsAscalpel [scream!] 20:59, 13 March 2007 (UTC)
- No, the reason I did not move my rook is because it would surely have been the end of me. My B-Rook is only protected because my pawn is there to ward off your king. But as soon as I move it out to trap you, it would have been vulnerable to your king. In the time when I would ahve been trying to protect my rook, that would have given you an opportunity when you weren't in check to trap my king as you were probably planning. This was the best move I could have made in my opinion. --Señor DiZtheGreat CUN AOTM ( Worship me!) (Praise me!) (Join me!) AMEN! 21:55, 13 March 2007 (UTC)
- You were one turn from checkmate them but, I can't remember, it seemed to me that you could scrwed me up very much with your rooks. I played my last turn them without noticing you a-pawn that prevented me from taking your rook with my king. -- herr doktor needsAscalpel [scream!] 22:00, 13 March 2007 (UTC)
- Let's bet something on this? A cookie, ninjastar or custom award? -- herr doktor needsAscalpel [scream!] 22:50, 13 March 2007 (UTC)
- I have a custom award of my own if you win, but what about if I win?...I know, you can scrub my deck, it's getting dirty down there. --Señor DiZtheGreat CUN AOTM ( Worship me!) (Praise me!) (Join me!) AMEN! 21:29, 15 March 2007 (UTC)
- I'm a good templatesmith, you may see... -- herr doktor needsAscalpel [scream!] 21:36, 15 March 2007 (UTC)
- Watta beautiful brawl. We should bring the cheerleaders... -- herr doktor needsAscalpel [scream!] 20:27, 17 March 2007 (UTC)
- Don't worry, this should be over soon enough. --Señor DiZtheGreat CUN AOTM ( Worship me!) (Praise me!) (Join me!) AMEN! 21:17, 20 March 2007 (UTC)
- I guess (or hope) so. Man, I have a problem noticing pawns. -- herr doktor needsAscalpel [scream!] 05:04, 21 March 2007 (UTC)
- Sorry for the (one week?) delay. My connection was pretty screwed last week. -- herr doktor needsAscalpel [scream!] 13:31, 29 March 2007 (UTC)
- Needabrain, just as a reminder, the black side is at the bottom, the white side is at the top. So you might wanna take that last move back, just in case you didn't realize that. --Señor DiZtheGreat CUN AOTM ( Worship me!) (Praise me!) (Join me!) AMEN! 16:53, 6 April 2007 (UTC)
- I've started this particular game with the whites at the bottom. See the history if you don't remember. -- herr doktor needsAscalpel [scream!] 18:14, 6 April 2007 (UTC)
- So you did...well, next time, please don't, it gets confusing towards the end of the game. --Señor DiZtheGreat CUN AOTM ( Worship me!) (Praise me!) (Join me!) AMEN! 18:58, 6 April 2007 (UTC)
- All right then. Next time. -- herr doktor needsAscalpel [scream!] 06:32, 7 April 2007 (UTC)
- Since you don't want to play this anymore, I'm proposing a tie. Let's liberate room for new games. -- herr doktor needsAscalpel [scream!] 00:42, 26 April 2007 (UTC)
Game #6 Lord Fluffy v. DiZ (Lord Fluffy's Move)[edit | edit source]
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- Last Move: DiZ (knight to g5, takes pawn)
Comment[edit | edit source]
- Good luck. I look forward to playing you. I hope you don't mind- I took the first move. Lord Fluffy who rains fire from the heavens
- Sorry it took so long for me to move. I wasn't sure what to do. --Lord Fluffy who rains fire from the heavens 15:43, 18 March 2007 (UTC)
Game #7 DotJasperDotNot v. DiZ (DiZ's Move)[edit | edit source]
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- Last Move: DotJasperDotNot (pawn to d5)
Comment Box[edit | edit source]
- Good Luck. DJ DN's Profile
div style="float: center;text-align:center;padding:5px;background-color:#F5F5F5;border: 1px solid #DDD">
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Game #X /White: User:Elenchus / Black:<player2>
- Last Move:
Darth Lithuania VS Everyone else[edit | edit source]
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- Last Move:
- Good luck to whomever wins.
Not A Good Username360 VS. Frohawk (360's move, check)[edit | edit source]
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KUN/ Black:Frohawk
- Last Move: Not A Good Username360
Frohawk vs. Yichizhng[edit | edit source]
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- Last Move: Frohawk, check
Sorry about the long wait.
No problem.