Uncyclopedia:Reefer Desk/Archive7

An iPod joke!

Please Help this Picture New, from Griffin Technology, the iTrip Image credit: Ljlego Nominate - discuss this image

It was created to complement my article (linked in the caption). It's my first photoshopping attempt, so don't be too mean.-Sir Ljlego, GUN VFH FIYC WotM SG WHotM PWotM AotM EGAEDM ANotM + (Talk) 22:21, 24 June 2007 (UTC)

It's a trip. You might consider muting the trippy colours a bit to help bring out the guy. Or not, he is tripping, apparently. Sir Modusoperandi ^Boinc! 02:00, 25 June 2007 (UTC)

Well, that's an acceptable response. Though that doesn't leave much constructive criticism.-Sir Ljlego, GUN VFH FIYC WotM SG WHotM PWotM AotM EGAEDM ANotM + (Talk) 02:32, 25 June 2007 (UTC)

It is what it's supposed to be. What's to criticize? Sir Modusoperandi ^Boinc! 02:51, 25 June 2007 (UTC)

Sweet! That's a compliment, I suppose. And coming from Modus, that's almost like getting it from RadX (divided by three :)). Thanks. Though I doubt it's VFP-worthy, to know that it's not crap is helpful (to my ego if nothing else).-Sir Ljlego, GUN VFH FIYC WotM SG WHotM PWotM AotM EGAEDM ANotM + (Talk) 02:59, 25 June 2007 (UTC)

RadX doesn't come down here. Something about mold. We're okay with that. He never puts a quarter in when he takes a coffee. Sir Modusoperandi ^Boinc! 03:17, 25 June 2007 (UTC)

It's OK. You're cool too. And you mingle with the little people. So you're like cooler! I'm such a kiss-ass.-Sir Ljlego, GUN VFH FIYC WotM SG WHotM PWotM AotM EGAEDM ANotM + (Talk) 03:19, 25 June 2007 (UTC)

Most creative TV show ever

Please Help this Picture Easily the most creative show on television. Image credit: Martinultima Nominate - discuss this image

Mostly going for the concept here, I know it's kind of a crappy image (please, somebody redo it properly who knows how to work Photoshop ;-) Basically shows my opinion of that stupid show that everyone seems to think is a completely new concept. ("If you'd just get that fourth wall installed...") Yeah, do whatever you want with it as far as I care.  Megalomaniac Martin “The Unfortunately Unfeatured” Ultima • (VOTE FOR ME!) • talk • (AND MY PICS TOO!) • contribs 00:01, 20 June 2007 (UTC)

That's not what we do here. Mostly, we help people to make their 'chops better. Sometimes we make rude noises. On Friday we have a barbeque. For this image, try to make the "'s" look the same as the other "american idol" script. Maybe offset the "got talent" lower so the the "got" doesn't disappear into the "american idol" section (black on blue is tough to read). Sir Modusoperandi ^Boinc! 00:22, 20 June 2007 (UTC)

Well, help make it better, redo it, same thing. OK, I guess not. Anyway, I did try to make it look like the original Idol script – the problem was, by hand it didn't look particularly convincing, so I just used GIMP's neon logo tool to kludge it. But yeah, thanks for your suggestions, so long as the concept's OK I can try a little harder with my chopping.  Megalomaniac Martin “The Unfortunately Unfeatured” Ultima • (VOTE FOR ME!) • talk • (AND MY PICS TOO!) • contribs 01:11, 20 June 2007 (UTC)

Take your time. It's like an analogy of some sort where you need to do something a bunch of times before your somethings look like something. Sir Modusoperandi ^Boinc! 01:14, 20 June 2007 (UTC)

Communism Rising

Please Help this Picture By the mid 1980's the Soviet Union had taken the space race a little bit too far. Image credit: Zerotrousers Nominate - discuss this image

I was bored. Any thoughts?--» >ZEROTROUSERS!!! EAT ME!!!! CRAZY PERSON! SMELLY!!! ILLOGIC, BEHOLD!!!!~» 07:54, 15 June 2007 (UTC)

Try it with the moon instead. Maybe have it rising from behind the Earth. Sir Modusoperandi ^Boinc! 08:43, 15 June 2007 (UTC)

Done.--» >ZEROTROUSERS!!! EAT ME!!!! CRAZY PERSON! SMELLY!!! ILLOGIC, BEHOLD!!!!~» 21:32, 15 June 2007 (UTC)

Hmm. I may have steered you wrong. Try making the commie sign bigger. It just looks like a boat sailing the world right now. Sir Modusoperandi ^Boinc! 22:10, 15 June 2007 (UTC)

Done.--» >ZEROTROUSERS!!! EAT ME!!!! CRAZY PERSON! SMELLY!!! ILLOGIC, BEHOLD!!!!~» 03:58, 16 June 2007 (UTC)

Scheiße! Picture this: the Earth at edge of frame (with only 1/3 of it visible), with commie moon rising (centre of frame) around back of the Earth. Sir Modusoperandi ^Boinc! 04:10, 16 June 2007 (UTC)

Done.--» >ZEROTROUSERS!!! EAT ME!!!! CRAZY PERSON! SMELLY!!! ILLOGIC, BEHOLD!!!!~» 05:11, 16 June 2007 (UTC)

I'm not going to ask to try anything else, because I suspect you'll become annoyed. Sir Modusoperandi ^Boinc! 05:17, 16 June 2007 (UTC)

Na, it's fine, throw it at me.--» >ZEROTROUSERS!!! EAT ME!!!! CRAZY PERSON! SMELLY!!! ILLOGIC, BEHOLD!!!!~» 20:39, 16 June 2007 (UTC)

Okay, try Mars instead of Moon. It's red. Sir Modusoperandi ^Boinc! 21:15, 16 June 2007 (UTC)

Oh Noes Nose!

Please Help this Picture A New Take on the Dreaded 'oh noes!' Image credit: Citation-Seer Nominate - discuss this image

Against. I get it, but i don't find it funny. If you made it realistic then it would be funny.--» >ZEROTROUSERS!!! EAT ME!!!! CRAZY PERSON! SMELLY!!! ILLOGIC, BEHOLD!!!!~» 07:57, 15 June 2007 (UTC)

Agreed. It's fighting it's MSPaint-ness. Plus it seems a bit obvious to me, but I have terrible taste. Sir Modusoperandi ^Boinc! 08:42, 15 June 2007 (UTC)

Barack obama Does not=Damsel in distress.--» >ZEROTROUSERS!!! EAT ME!!!! CRAZY PERSON! SMELLY!!! ILLOGIC, BEHOLD!!!!~» 03:22, 16 June 2007 (UTC)

• • Cough**They'reBothMeNotObama**Cough** -- [citations needed] 03:55, 16 June 2007 (UTC)

Try adding the shadow that the nose guy would cast on the guy. Also, consider saving it as PNG. Little details (like text) tend to artifact on JPGs. Sir Modusoperandi ^Boinc! 03:34, 16 June 2007 (UTC)

Super W. World

Please Help this Picture George W. saves some dude in Iran but still can't manage to find the WMDs. Image credit: Citation-Seer Nominate - discuss this image

This one's self explanatory, to say the least. I always wanted to do this picture. I'm just not sure how I should have done the Toad. --[citations needed] 06:20, 13 June 2007 (UTC)

I can't think of how you could improve the characters, but you should move them and the text a little to the left so they are centred. Sir Cs1987 UOTM. t. c 08:15, 13 June 2007 (UTC)

Try giving Toad normal-sized hair. Blonde, maybe. Sir Modusoperandi ^Boinc! 08:38, 13 June 2007 (UTC)

Do you think I could use this in he crappiest video games ever article (the one which holds the Subway video game as shown below)? What's the title and game purpose of this new game? 82.47.208.4 10:56, 13 June 2007 (UTC) Sorry, Weri long wang 10:58, 13 June 2007 (UTC)

Sure, I guess. Title? Gulf War II: Electric Boogaloo. Or something. Sir Modusoperandi ^Boinc! 15:00, 13 June 2007 (UTC)

It could probably be used for that. It's already used as a screenshot for the Weapons of Mass Destruction (game). --[citations needed] 21:35, 13 June 2007 (UTC)

George should probably have a better looking suit. Dark blue with a red tie like he usually wears would be a good choice. --~

Jacques Pirat, Esq. Converse : Benefactions : U.w.p.

16:48, 13 June 2007 (UTC)

Updated!

I liked the other shirt better, though.

Anyhow, I figured that the Toad could get a turban. I centered the letters, exc. Changed 'Castle' to 'Country.' And I edited almost everything on top except for the time. Anything else to improve..?--[citations needed] 20:21, 13 June 2007 (UTC)

Mexican Baby

Please Help this Picture An average mexican fetus. Image credit: Sliferjam Nominate - discuss this image

YEAH!...wait, what? so sayeth Sliferjam ~ Talk * Sock * Jam * Gallery * Fearless Fosdick? 20:06, 12 June 2007 (UTC)

The moustache is crooked, there's no shadow on Jr's head from the sombrero, and he's not centred on the pic. Ole! Sir Modusoperandi ^Boinc! 21:10, 12 June 2007 (UTC)

Hulk Racing!

Please Help this Picture The Incredible Hulk, seconds before winning his first Olympic Gold medal. Image credit: Sliferjam Nominate - discuss this image

Allready I see The Hulk needs a number on his front. I'll do that soon. What else, besides crappy finish line and ugly pixelly man racer beside The Hulk? so sayeth Sliferjam ~ Talk * Sock * Jam * Gallery * Fearless Fosdick? 19:37, 12 June 2007 (UTC)

Bright ground under Hulk make look like Hulk not there! Hulk need shadow! Hulk smash! Sir Modusoperandi ^Boinc! 21:07, 12 June 2007 (UTC)

Yaargh! Thar be shadows fer ye! And a snazzy number for his chest, too! I think that looks great! I figured out how to make paper stuff look real(ish)! so sayeth Sliferjam ~ Talk * Sock * Jam * Gallery * Fearless Fosdick? 19:36, 13 June 2007 (UTC)

I'm a bit late, but I would say that it looks like a racer's gonna beat the Hulk. That's just me, though.-Sir Ljlego, GUN VFH FIYC WotM SG WHotM PWotM AotM EGAEDM ANotM + (Talk) 03:24, 25 June 2007 (UTC)

That's why he's in Hulk-form. Duh. "Hulk smash little man who beat Hulk in run game!" Sir Modusoperandi ^Boinc! 03:38, 25 June 2007 (UTC)

List of the crappiest video games ever

Please Help this Picture Jared wielding a super powerful nuclear rocket launcher: the Polaris II Image credit: Weri long wang Nominate - discuss this image

--Weri long wang 00:55, 12 June 2007 (UTC)

Try to find a pic of a Subway restaurant that was taken straight on, rather than on an angle, then reduce the number of colours and lower its resolution (there may be an effect to "pixelate"). This should make it look "in game", hopefully. Also, he's got no legs, which seems odd. Most people have them. I've got two myself. Sir Modusoperandi ^Boinc! 06:57, 12 June 2007 (UTC)

I tried to pixelate the subway picture but couldn't find the right effect to make it look a 1991 video game.--Weri long wang 11:33, 12 June 2007 (UTC)

I've never tried it, to be honest, but if you save the background at, say, 1/4 it's resolution, then put that lo-res version here and stretch it to fit the regular resolution, it should be "pixelated" (you'll need to mess with the resolution, probably. 1/4 is just a guess). Lowering the colour depth of the background should make it more EGA-like. Sir Modusoperandi ^Boinc! 11:55, 12 June 2007 (UTC)

I'll try MS Paint for that first, see what happens. --Weri long wang 15:07, 12 June 2007 (UTC)

Here, 16 colour version. --Weri long wang 15:24, 12 June 2007 (UTC)

Now just fill in the clear space on his arm. Sir Modusoperandi ^Boinc! 15:33, 12 June 2007 (UTC)

New version with full arm. --Weri long wang 15:54, 12 June 2007 (UTC)

Again, a tad late, but I'm certain that there is a filter that allows one to pixelate images. That's just me, though.-Sir Ljlego, GUN VFH FIYC WotM SG WHotM PWotM AotM EGAEDM ANotM + (Talk) 13:02, 14 July 2007 (UTC)

YES! the original duke nukem! --AmericanBastard 07:41, 23 July 2007 (UTC)

The Muffin Man

Please Help this Picture A picture of the Drewey Lane Dicer, more commonly refferred to as The muffin man Image credit: Jocke Pirat Nominate - discuss this image

• --~

  Jacques Pirat, Esq. Converse : Benefactions : U.w.p.

  02:55, 7 June 2007 (UTC)

Blur the hat up a bit and lower its contrast (as its brights are brighter than the rest of the pic). Sir Modusoperandi ^Boinc! 03:20, 7 June 2007 (UTC)

That should do it... --~

Jacques Pirat, Esq. Converse : Benefactions : U.w.p.

01:07, 8 June 2007 (UTC)

Maybe add a bit of shading between his hat and head. Sir Modusoperandi ^Boinc! 06:59, 12 June 2007 (UTC)

Tiny little border added to seperate the two. --~

Jacques Pirat, Esq. Converse : Benefactions : U.w.p.

16:18, 12 June 2007 (UTC)

Well, that's it, then. Sir Modusoperandi ^Boinc! 21:04, 12 June 2007 (UTC)

Thanks.--~

Jacques Pirat, Esq. Converse : Benefactions : U.w.p.

22:07, 12 June 2007 (UTC)

This could be really funny if he was behind bars, or perhaps holding a booking card or whatever they're called.   t o m p k i n s  blah. ﺞوﻦ וףה ՃՄ ண்ஸ ފއހ วอฏม +տ trade websites 21:38, 13 June 2007 (UTC)

That's a mugshot card below him. Apparently he was playing Scrabble when they caught him. Sir Modusoperandi ^Boinc! 23:11, 13 June 2007 (UTC)

de Gaulle with kaleidoscope eyes

Please Help this Picture An unfortunate miscommunication lead to the single for Lucy in the Sky with Diamonds, from 1967's Sgt. Pepper's Lonely Hearts Club Band, being released in France with this cover. Image credit: Modusoperandi Nominate - discuss this image

• I don't know if this is the worst pun ever, but it's got to be in the top ten. I'm wondering mostly if this is too obscure. I'm also wondering if it's funny. I'm also also wondering if anyone can find a home for this. He's housetrained. This might be a better caption ...Picture yourself on a train in a station/With plasticine porters with looking glass ties/Suddenly someone is there at the turnstile/de Gaulle with kaleidoscope eyes. Or maybe not. Now I've got that damn song stuck in my head. Thanks a lot, brain! Sir Modusoperandi ^Boinc! 03:56, 3 June 2007 (UTC)

  I know its off the song idea, but what about: "Though many in the Allied Forces questioned DeGaulle's capabilities, none challenged his vision for for a free, and very groovy France" Dame GUN PotY WotM 2xPotM 17xVFH VFP Poo PMS •YAP• 13:59, 3 June 2007 (UTC)

  Groovy. I'm leaning toward my second one, but I'm not sure. Sir Modusoperandi ^Boinc! 14:39, 3 June 2007 (UTC)

  I like the original caption best. I think it explains the joke perfectly well. The picture is great. Sir Cs1987 UOTM. t. c 07:11, 12 June 2007 (UTC)

  Cool. So the eyebrows aren't a bit much, then? Sir Modusoperandi ^Boinc! 07:19, 12 June 2007 (UTC)

  Not at all. I laughed when I noticed them. They match his eyes well. Sir Cs1987 UOTM. t. c 07:27, 12 June 2007 (UTC)

Tennis VIP Spaces

Please Help this Picture French Open 2007, tickets on sale now. Educate your kids on the beauty of tennis now! Limited tickets. Image credit: Gneomi Nominate - discuss this image

Okay I need help, hehe, thanks, Also, is it French Open or France Open? - It's gneomI 07:56, 1 June 2007 (UTC)

French...and I don't get it. Sir Modusoperandi ^Boinc! 08:17, 1 June 2007 (UTC)

The kid is looking up the skirt. It's gneomI 08:21, 1 June 2007 (UTC)

Well, that just goes to show you how much I know about tennis. Sir Modusoperandi ^Boinc! 08:25, 1 June 2007 (UTC)

Love the image, but think if ypu are going to use text within the image it better look great. This doesn't, so either move it to the bottom so it looks like an advert or take it off completely. Other than that I like it. -- Sir Mhaille  (talk to me)

Hang on a sec I'll modify it. Thanks -- It's gneomI 12:33, 1 June 2007 (UTC)

Try a white glow or a stroke around the blue text.....its difficult to read against the background. -- Sir Mhaille  (talk to me)

Oh, I see now...the middle thing is supposed to be glass. You need to copy the crowd and the tennis player, flip them and paste them over the glass. Play around with distorting them and their transparency so that it looks like the glass is glass. Sir Modusoperandi ^Boinc! 15:25, 1 June 2007 (UTC)

There it is, with Mhaille's help, and I've also make the reflection of the crowds. Glassier? It's gneomI 04:27, 2 June 2007 (UTC)

Either darken the kiddie slide/steps thingy, or lose it. Sir Modusoperandi ^Boinc! 05:48, 3 June 2007 (UTC)

Nuke Me if you can

Please Help this Picture Now showing at all good Middle-Eastern warzones near you! Image credit: Olipro Nominate - discuss this image

Try playing around with the hat size a bit. George's head is too big for it. Also, drop the brightness under the hat in a shadowy way. Sir Modusoperandi ^Boinc! 03:16, 23 May 2007 (UTC)

Awesome, just fix george's hat. --AmericanBastard 17:45, 23 May 2007 (UTC)

Yeah, once you sort out that hat thing I will nominate this for VFP myself. -- Sir Mhaille  (talk to me)

Ok, I've rejigged the hat as best as possible... added some shadowing and modified the size a bit so it's not so incongruous with the picture -- Prof. Olipro KUN (W)Anchor Op Bur. (Harass) 23:28, 23 May 2007 (UTC)

Now just darken across hps forehead with the burn tool.... -- Sir Mhaille  (talk to me)

Yeah, that's what I did, I'll do it some more. -- Prof. Olipro KUN (W)Anchor Op Bur. (Harass) 14:33, 24 May 2007 (UTC)

See I think that its not the size of the hat, its the lighting on it that throws it off. Dame GUN PotY WotM 2xPotM 17xVFH VFP Poo PMS •YAP• 00:04, 24 May 2007 (UTC)

Alrighty, done, and I've changed the small light-grey credits text at the bottom and between their heads too, so you'll know if you're looking at an outdated version -- Prof. Olipro KUN (W)Anchor Op Bur. (Harass) 15:26, 24 May 2007 (UTC)

Now can you give Ahmadinejad slingback shoes and put a watermelon in his mouth? Thanks... -- Sir Mhaille  (talk to me)

Watermelon? Really? I'm picturing an orange peel smile. Sir Modusoperandi ^Boinc! 17:19, 24 May 2007 (UTC)

Oh Mhaille... if you wanted me to make an image to turn you on you should have asked earlier. -- Prof. Olipro KUN (W)Anchor Op Bur. (Harass) 18:10, 24 May 2007 (UTC)

I'll just give you two some space. /me flicks on red light, puts Barry White on the turntable, cracks a bottle of wine, exits quietly. Sir Modusoperandi ^Boinc! 18:23, 24 May 2007 (UTC)

The vaseline tub is empty and my lips are still dry -- Prof. Olipro KUN (W)Anchor Op Bur. (Harass) 19:19, 24 May 2007 (UTC)

Just the way I like it. -- Sir Mhaille  (talk to me)

Is it just me, or does Dubya look a bit like Prince Charles there? RabbiTechno 17:13, 27 May 2007 (UTC)

Pick up the Phone Booth and Aisle

Please Help this Picture This image may be proof that Hurley won the Pick Up the Phone Booth and Aisle challenge Image credit: Gert5 Nominate - discuss this image

Poof! And there it was THEORYA. I knever get anything featured. --Sir General Minister G5 FIYC UPotM [Y] #21 F@H KUN 11:27, 13 May 2007 (UTC)

Maybe lower the booth a bit to give all of his fingers something to do. Try smoothing the edge of his forearm as well (it's all wiggly. Forearms aren't wiggly. Well, mine are. Stop staring!). Try starting out with higher-resolution pics; it will help save you from jaggies. This has them (like the left side of the phone booth). Sir Modusoperandi ^Boinc! 16:27, 13 May 2007 (UTC)

Disturbingly accurate fortune cookie

Please Help this Picture Every once in a while fortune cookie fortunes are right friggin' on Image credit: Modusoperandi Nominate - discuss this image

• A while ago a fortune cookie spoof appeared on VFP. I said it could be better without being injokey. I finally got around to 'chopping it. Was it worth my time? Sir Modusoperandi ^Boinc! 03:56, 13 May 2007 (UTC)

Yeah, that was mine. Anyway, this image is as perfect as I know (might be for my Estonian heritage thingie) and I suggest others to think for me, which makes this comments useless. I'm here just to add my pic. --Sir General Minister G5 FIYC UPotM [Y] #21 F@H KUN 11:27, 13 May 2007 (UTC)

Perhaps "Distrurbingly" as the adverb rather than the transitive for the title. --AmericanBastard 02:26, 17 May 2007 (UTC)

Pesky english... Sir Modusoperandi ^Boinc! 02:43, 17 May 2007 (UTC)

Hannibal Lector's

Please Help this Picture Where discounted beef is on you! Image credit: AmericanBastard Nominate - discuss this image

Hannibal is too bright and he needs a shadow. You might want to try integrating the caption too, as without it it's not obvious that it's a grocery. --Sir Modusoperandi ^Boinc! 21:24, 8 May 2007 (UTC)

They sell beef in a stadium? Dame GUN PotY WotM 2xPotM 17xVFH VFP Poo PMS •YAP• 22:10, 8 May 2007 (UTC)

I was thinking that Lechters was a kitchen goods chain... Dame GUN PotY WotM 2xPotM 17xVFH VFP Poo PMS •YAP• 22:10, 8 May 2007 (UTC)

Well, either way it's not obvious. Believe me, I know obvious. --Sir Modusoperandi ^Boinc! 22:18, 8 May 2007 (UTC)

Try making Hannibal's head more 'concretey' somehow. Try a grey gradient map or something. Also, behind the sign looks a bit white. You might wanna fill that in as well. -- Hindleyite Converse • ?pedia 10:55, 9 May 2007 (UTC)

Revised, finally. What you say!? --AmericanBastard 19:32, 27 May 2007 (UTC)

Okay, this may be because I just woke up but...they look exactly the same to me. I compared this (hannibal_copy2) version side by each with the other one (hannibal_copy) and everything. Have I finally snapped? Sir Modusoperandi ^Boinc! 19:48, 27 May 2007 (UTC)

Yeah, the head was all bronzy before. It is now texturized and has a duller slate gradient. --AmericanBastard 15:39, 31 May 2007 (UTC)

The Hook Headed Man

Please Help this Picture After the fateful duel with Alan Burr, Hamilton was resurrected by his supporters using the powers of the Freemasons. Centuries later, he made a terrible villian for a movie series. Image credit: Jocke Pirat Nominate - discuss this image

I did this a bit quick, so there's bound to be a mistake... --~

Jacques Pirat, Esq. Converse : Benefactions : U.w.p.

01:07, 7 May 2007 (UTC)

It looks okay to me. You may want to clean up the edge around the hook. The clone brushing behind it is a bit suspect, though. The trick with the clone brush is to mix it up (paint a bit, then clone from a slightly different area) or it ends up with the repeating pattern that ruins the effect. --Sir Modusoperandi ^Boinc! 01:59, 7 May 2007 (UTC)

This should be fixed now... --~

Jacques Pirat, Esq. Converse : Benefactions : U.w.p.

02:40, 7 May 2007 (UTC)

Is the knife lit in the reverse? Or do I have my contacts in the wrong eye. Dame GUN PotY WotM 2xPotM 17xVFH VFP Poo PMS •YAP• 02:11, 7 May 2007 (UTC)

The machete is not. The light is hitting it from behind, reflecting the edge. --~

Jacques Pirat, Esq. Converse : Benefactions : U.w.p.

02:18, 7 May 2007 (UTC)

Well, there are at least two lights in this scene. But it's Jason, eh, so rather than quibble over set design, I'm just going to run away. --Sir Modusoperandi ^Boinc! 02:24, 7 May 2007 (UTC)

Or rather in this case just step a little to the right... --~

Jacques Pirat, Esq. Converse : Benefactions : U.w.p.

02:40, 7 May 2007 (UTC)

Odd. Suddenly I feel the urge to do the Time Warp. Again. --Sir Modusoperandi ^Boinc! 02:43, 7 May 2007 (UTC)

Dammit, Janet. -- Sir Mhaille  (talk to me)

From what I can tell there are two sources of light, from behind and the weaker from above. To me it looks like the leading edge, facing down is lit. Its just what I see in an otherwise perfectly good image. Dame GUN PotY WotM 2xPotM 17xVFH VFP Poo PMS •YAP• 00:18, 8 May 2007 (UTC)

You aren't going to write an angry letter to Hollywood again are you? --Sir Modusoperandi ^Boinc! 03:54, 8 May 2007 (UTC)

Makes me hot when you recognize my not-so-random patterns. Dame GUN PotY WotM 2xPotM 17xVFH VFP Poo PMS •YAP• 11:57, 8 May 2007 (UTC)

<emoticon me being stunned at my ability to do things to married, brood-raisin' crazy white-trash broads via the internet>. I've got an odd superpower. Useless for crimefighting. Magneto just laughs at me. Even Aquaman thinks he's better than me, and all he does is tickle clams. At least that's what Wonder Woman says. --Sir Modusoperandi ^Boinc! 15:42, 8 May 2007 (UTC)

Google Bomb

Please Help this Picture Warning: Don't be near explosion. Every link in your body would be rearranged. That would hurt. Image credit: Uncyclopedian Nominate - discuss this image

It's more google than bomb. Try making the "e" a bomb. Then it would be google bomb. --Sir Modusoperandi ^Boinc! 15:44, 6 May 2007 (UTC)

Any better? Marshal Uncyclopedian! Talk to me! 15:57, 6 May 2007 (UTC)

Plus, I only have MS Paint, so don't expect me to be able to do much. Marshal Uncyclopedian! Talk to me! 15:58, 6 May 2007 (UTC)

Read the tips I gave for the wright flyer below. If you're using MSPaint they apply to you too. --Sir Modusoperandi ^Boinc! 16:04, 6 May 2007 (UTC)

Georgidas and Xenijad

Please Help this Picture 300 subliminal messages Image credit: Medvedev Nominate - discuss this image

• Play with the brightness/contrast/colour levels on the heads. They're much brighter and distinctly different colours than the bodies. Either Bush's head needs to be smaller or Mahmoud's needs to be smaller, too. --Sir Modusoperandi ^Boinc! 20:36, 5 May 2007 (UTC)
• To me, this is a sepia tone image with two full-color heads slapped onto it. So I would fix the head sizes, and adjust the colors into the sepia ranges, then I would address the lighting issues. I also have an issue with the expressions on the faces - what are they trying to convey? Dame GUN PotY WotM 2xPotM 17xVFH VFP Poo PMS •YAP• 20:51, 5 May 2007 (UTC)

They look just like that time I was in prison. I was the front guy with the vaguely surprised look on his face. Perhaps I've said too much. Maybe one day I'll tell you about that time I went on a canoe trip in the deep south. --Sir Modusoperandi ^Boinc! 20:54, 5 May 2007 (UTC)

• Played around with filtering for a bit and reduced size. Before, I was so caught up with the (perceived) awesomeness of the idea that the execution suffered a tad. What they're supposed to convey? Ahmadinejad - deviousness. Bush - stupidity. Note that this is a parody, not necessarily my opinion about the two. --Medvedev ^(scream) 21:32, 5 May 2007 (UTC)
  • Awesome - what do you think of the changes? Dame GUN PotY WotM 2xPotM 17xVFH VFP Poo PMS •YAP• 21:47, 5 May 2007 (UTC)

Since nobody else answered, I will assume you're asking me. I like them. I'm not too happy with Bush's color, but Ahmadinejad looks more realistic than Xerxes ever did... --Medvedev ^(scream) 06:52, 6 May 2007 (UTC)

Um, more importantly, what do you think? Would this stand a chance on VFP?--Medvedev ^(scream) 08:44, 6 May 2007 (UTC)

VFP is unpredictable. There are no sure things. Think of it as Russian Roulette, but with an axe. More to the point I'm terrible at predicting what will pass and what won't. --Sir Modusoperandi ^Boinc! 09:49, 6 May 2007 (UTC)

The Wright Flyer

Please Help this Picture The Wright Brother's first powered flight at Kitty Hawk Image credit: Ikabu Nominate - discuss this image

• Yes, this is a bad chop and no, I haven't used Potatochop much (well, Paint.NET), so I'd be EXTREMELY thankful to anyone who could give some technical advice or just general advice. Thanks, {Ikabu}BUZZ...FLICK...GURGLE... 05:28, 5 May 2007 (UTC).

1th: get Gimp. Spending all that time 'chopping with a crappy application to end up with, well, this, is a waste. It would be like buying a keyboard that's missing half of the letters; sure, you can still type, buy why?

2st: play around with Gimp. Tutorials may be your speed, but it's more fun just to mess around. You can always undo.

3nd: come back here when you've tinkered. We're ever so lonely. Bring cabbage. We're hungry too. --Sir Modusoperandi ^Boinc! 06:07, 5 May 2007 (UTC)

Wilbur thought he had won the coin toss to fly the Machine, and all went well for the first twenty seconds until the leather straps holding him to the damned thing snapped and his body was flung into the ocean.

• After you get Gimp (or Microsoft Photodraw on ebay - its the graphics program for people who can't hack Gimp) then you need to start thinking satire and context. While I see what you are getting at, to me there are two issues with this image that don't work for me.

First is the builing on the left edge of the image - it needs to go.

The other issue is, even if the chop issue is resolved and cleaned up, all you have is a 747 and Kitty Hawk - that isn't enough to get more than an "eh" out of me - because there is an important element missing - Wilbur Wright. Where is he because he's suppossed to be on the plane flying it. So for comparision purposes, here's my rough take on what makes the joke work for me. (note - I understand that this needs a whole lot of help - it was just a quick chop to show how I would have done it.) Dame GUN PotY WotM 2xPotM 17xVFH VFP Poo PMS •YAP• 22:27, 5 May 2007 (UTC)

Skywalker's New Groove

Please Help this Picture Due to the power of sheer awesome, Luke's daddy was able to kick it up a notch. Image credit: Zombiebaron Nominate - discuss this image

• Not really sure if this has a home on any articles, but I'm sure somebody could make it a home. The idea struck me when I first saw the source image, and I couldn't help myself. -- The Zombiebaron 23:18, 28 April 2007 (UTC)

Surely Uncyc has some sort of Star Wars page. --Sir Modusoperandi ^Boinc! 23:37, 28 April 2007 (UTC)

Any deodorent pages? "Made for a man, but Dark Lords like it too." Dame GUN PotY WotM 2xPotM 17xVFH VFP Poo PMS •YAP• 00:09, 29 April 2007 (UTC)

I'm sure we can sort that out after you both tell how funny and nommable it is... -- The Zombiebaron 00:34, 29 April 2007 (UTC)

It's well done but...it's starting from a boring pic. There's no background, no joi de vivre. Plus it's from the shitty starwars' that I hate. Damn George Lucas. In short, I have no idea just what will and what won't pass VFP, but this makes me...meh. Not the review you were looking for but, if it makes you feel any better, I have terrible taste. --Sir Modusoperandi ^Boinc! 04:08, 1 May 2007 (UTC)

Technically, its very clean, but as Modus point out, where's the joy or viva? Now if the background were different, it would make it more interesting, but there is still the problem with finding people who love to cheer for the untalented Mr. Christianson. Dame GUN PotY WotM 2xPotM 17xVFH VFP Poo PMS •YAP• 20:59, 5 May 2007 (UTC)

Allahade

Please Help this Picture Made for the typical muslim today. Allahade is he in you? Image credit: CartoonDiablo Nominate - discuss this image

• The bumps where the "t" and "d" go in the Gatorade logo need to be removed. -- The Zombiebaron 23:20, 28 April 2007 (UTC)
• The black border that you added to match the existing border is awfully inconsistent & blurry. Try making the headwrap smaller, so that you can see more of the lightningy thingy; that'll make it more recognizable. "Jihade" may work better. Or not. --Sir Modusoperandi ^Boinc! 23:32, 28 April 2007 (UTC)
• The turbin outline is too fuzzy, and the red symbol is too red - try a softer color, like a dark geranium. Dame GUN PotY WotM 2xPotM 17xVFH VFP Poo PMS •YAP• 00:10, 29 April 2007 (UTC)
• The border for the turban is too black, and may not even be neccesary. The border around the letters should be redone completely to match the letters. The sticks of dynamite pop out too much, mask them and shade them so they blend into the picture. The letters of the logo should be green like the gatorade logo. -- Kaizer the Bjorn takkun (nya nya) (1961 model!) Check out T61! 16:09, 4 May 2007 (UTC)
• But why a gatorade spin? --AmericanBastard 20:40, 8 May 2007 (UTC)

Laser Chicks

Please Help this Picture Females will resist rape with their eye lasers, except for in Japan where it's legal. Image credit: Sliferjam Nominate - discuss this image

You like? How make it better? so sayeth Sliferjam ~ Talk * Sock * Jam * Gallery * Fearless Fosdick? 00:16, 24 April 2007 (UTC)

Lose the explosiony thing on the left. Try replacing it with smoke or fire. Or, if you're attached to explosions, make it a bit transparent. --Sir Modusoperandi ^Boinc! 00:37, 24 April 2007 (UTC)

• For, -- The Zombiebaron 18:28, 24 April 2007 (UTC)

I fixed it somewhat. How's that? so sayeth Sliferjam ~ Talk * Sock * Jam * Gallery * Fearless Fosdick? 16:10, 25 April 2007 (UTC)

It looks the same to me. Granted, I'm quite mad, but the explosiony thing on the left looks more like a flower of some sort than an explosion, also of some sort. --Sir Modusoperandi ^Boinc! 17:40, 25 April 2007 (UTC)

Peronally, I like it, and I get what the thing is to the left, although it may not be something that everyone does understand. So add me to the "FOR" group Dame GUN PotY WotM 2xPotM 17xVFH VFP Poo PMS •YAP• 23:31, 25 April 2007 (UTC)

Wasn't this done with cats originally? -- Sir Mhaille  (talk to me)

You say that about everything. --Sir Modusoperandi ^Boinc! 00:34, 26 April 2007 (UTC)

And sharks? -- Hindleyite Converse • ?pedia 20:25, 26 April 2007 (UTC)

Brilliant, i've seen this picture somewhere before... in a galaxy far far away. The explosion thing on the left is fine; if i were some retarded critic i'd be like, "what's with the that stupid looking popcorn thing on the left?" --AmericanBastard 03:46, 27 April 2007 (UTC)

It was a parody (kindof) of lasercats.jpg, and I thought I could make it more interesting. Thanks for the input. so sayeth Sliferjam ~ Talk * Sock * Jam * Gallery * Fearless Fosdick? 13:05, 27 April 2007 (UTC)

Yeah....anything that involves scantily clad nubile girls has to be viewed as "more interesting". :) It is a very nice piece of work though. -- Sir Mhaille  (talk to me)

There is pixliness on the right girl's arm. I could fix that but you are teh man lol!1 --Sir General Minister G5 FIYC UPotM [Y] #21 F@H KUN 19:05, 13 May 2007 (UTC)

Live Aids

Please Help this Picture An Africa Music Festival Orgy. Image credit: AmericanBastard Nominate - discuss this image

2nd modification. --AmericanBastard 23:23, 22 April 2007 (UTC)

I don't much get the joke myself, as I mostly stick to jokes about how how kittens like to play with balls of yarn, but it looks like what it's spoofing. Sometimes, when a kitten plays with a ball of yarn, it will lose its balance and fall over, making a spoof sound. --Sir Modusoperandi ^Boinc! 02:14, 23 April 2007 (UTC)

Add me to the list of of the confused. What are you trying to accomplish with the image? Dame GUN PotY WotM 2xPotM 17xVFH VFP Poo PMS •YAP• 23:30, 25 April 2007 (UTC)

Sorry if your not familiar with the event; what are any of these images trying to "accomplish" besides humor? --AmericanBastard 14:29, 26 April 2007 (UTC)

• Rather than a NRV, maybe a large HIV virus would work? --~

  Jacques Pirat, Esq. Converse : Benefactions : U.w.p.

  00:28, 27 April 2007 (UTC)

Is there a universal logo for "Nice to meet you, I have AIDS!!!"? --AmericanBastard 03:49, 27 April 2007 (UTC)

Ummmm...Freddie Mercury? Eazy-E? Isaac Asimov? Anybody else on this list? -- The Zombiebaron 04:55, 27 April 2007 (UTC)

What if i turned the syringe into a basketball hoop and showed Magic Johnson dunking africa? --AmericanBastard 18:21, 27 April 2007 (UTC)

Is that a Dungeons and Dragons joke? -- The Zombiebaron 21:42, 27 April 2007 (UTC)

No. If it was it would have things like a "magic Johnson +2" and a "hoop of basketball". If, however, he offers to show you his "magic Johnson" or, indeed, a Johnson of any kind, say "no". --Sir Modusoperandi ^Boinc! 00:51, 28 April 2007 (UTC)

"My level 12 orc paladin has a flaming sold gold shock burst keen Johnson, and a dagger." -- The Zombiebaron 00:37, 29 April 2007 (UTC)

omg.--AmericanBastard 05:15, 5 May 2007 (UTC)

It appears that many people do not understand this picture. My guess is that it's saying that Africa can no longer be saved and should just be nuked. It appears to be a parody of Live Aid which is an extremely esoteric subject already. In terms of quality, there is nothing wrong with this picture, its just that the concept is too hard to pull off and even then, the joke isn't very funny. -- Kaizer the Bjorn takkun (nya nya) (1961 model!) Check out T61! 16:15, 4 May 2007 (UTC)

Yeah, it's kinda esoteric outside the world of music. --AmericanBastard 05:15, 5 May 2007 (UTC)

Pavement Diver

Please Help this Picture A possible asphalt surfer or Special Olympics contestant mistaking a cement-pond for a pool. Image credit: AmericanBastard Nominate - discuss this image

Does the diver's trajectory look too off or is it just me from starring at it for 2 long? --AmericanBastard 03:36, 8 April 2007 (UTC)

Little bit. He's diving more 9 o'clock, while the board is pointing 10:15. Also, he's too bright; dim him a bit, play with the brightness/contrast. --Sir Modusoperandi ^Boinc! 04:04, 8 April 2007 (UTC)

The sun is supposed to be exposing him; from about 10:00. I darkened the rear slightly to add depth. So rotate him a few degrees? Considering distance, I placed him to be about 75% from the peek of his bound. Does the diving board look a bit funky? --AmericanBastard 04:45, 8 April 2007 (UTC)

The board does look funky. It's got no texture (it looks more like you painted a board, which you did, methinks). It may work better if he's just at the "leap" point near the start of a dive. From his posture it looks like that'd be best. With his current position in the air he'd be in the "stretch" point of the dive (and stretched out, rather than crouched). These are pretty technical diving terms, I admit; I'm somewhat of an expert in these matters, having never seen any form of diving whatsoever. --Sir Modusoperandi ^Boinc! 20:38, 8 April 2007 (UTC)

Im not at my computer with adobe and won't be for another few days. When I get back on i'll move the diver closer to the start and add some kind of texture to the board. --AmericanBastard 02:35, 9 April 2007 (UTC)

Personall I feel the board needs to be longer instead of the diver closer to the board - after all, the diving platform is out over the water in the real wolrd, so it would reason thatthe board should be further out and over the side of the building. Dame GUN PotY WotM 2xPotM 17xVFH VFP Poo PMS •YAP• 22:16, 16 April 2007 (UTC)

2nd Modification! --AmericanBastard 23:23, 22 April 2007 (UTC)

Now it looks like he's about to fall over backwards. Try rotating both him and the board CCW until it looks like he's trying to go left. His shadow on the board is too "blobby"; try cutting it back a bit. Picture yourself as the sun looking down on him and make up his shadow from that. You look down on every one. You're the sun, damnit! --Sir Modusoperandi ^Boinc! 00:25, 23 April 2007 (UTC)

The length of the Board is good as is the edge that he's diving over. The thing with the light on the diver is that it seems to be coming from two different areas. I would 1) tone down the light on him. or crank up the light fill effect on the buildings around him, and shade the tops of his thighs. Then I would tip him ever so slightly forward on the board so that it looks as if he plans to tumble over the edge of the board. Dame GUN PotY WotM 2xPotM 17xVFH VFP Poo PMS •YAP• 23:34, 25 April 2007 (UTC)

• The shadow on the ground is wierd. Removing it seems the painlessest way to go about things. -- The Zombiebaron 00:39, 29 April 2007 (UTC)
• Right now this picture looks like it could be something you would see on Livejournal as a poor attempt at a funny.

1. The board should be going outward from the building, and should be flat. Right now it looks like the board is jutting out of the roof at an awkward angle.
2. The diver is at a strange angle, by the looks of his position, he should be just jumping off the board at about a 45 degree angle.
3. The diver's lighting does not match the lighting of the rest of the picture. Try to find sources that are similar enough in lighting that there is less editing necessary to correct it.

Overall: From the looks of your sources, this image may not be possible to pull off as an actual photo. In this situation I would develop a two dimensional black and white "sign-style" picture. It would still get the same message across without the problems with editing quality. -- Kaizer the Bjorn takkun (nya nya) (1961 model!) Check out T61! 16:25, 4 May 2007 (UTC)

1. An actual diver will be waay funnier than just a sign. I get what you mean though

ATM

Please Help this Picture A new Sperm Bank ATM with handy deposit slot and withdrawl pump. Image credit: Sliferjam Nominate - discuss this image

Help? so sayeth Sliferjam ~ Talk * Sock * Jam * Gallery * Fearless Fosdick? 15:07, 13 April 2007 (UTC)

Hmmmmmm...difficult one. One of the strengths of the image is its off the wallness, so I'm not sure that working to blend some of the elements into the base image will improve it. I hate the "logo" on the screen, the text looks awful, also the text that appears beneath the FleshLight gives the impression you've just copied and pasted straight onto it. -- Sir Mhaille  (talk to me)

I had to look up FleshLight...you're creeping me out, Mhaille. On a side note, Mhaille's right. And he's not wearing any pants. And the fuel pump (?) confuses and frightens me. Also, it's a pun that has been done to death. I never got it, myself. I mean a bank is a place you put money in, and a sperm bank is a place you put sper...ah. --Sir Modusoperandi ^Boinc! 18:44, 13 April 2007 (UTC)

In my defence someone DID post a link on IRC to a Crazy Frog FleshLight image a few hours before I responded here. Plaese excuse my tpying. -- Sir Mhaille  (talk to me)

Reason #79 why I'm rarely on IRC. --Sir Modusoperandi ^Boinc! 20:16, 14 April 2007 (UTC)

IRC? -- The Zombiebaron 18:30, 24 April 2007 (UTC)

Ummm...why does it contain the normal ATM bits? Why would my "baby making wand" need to use a Visa card? Or is legal to sell your "tadpoles" in places that aren't Canada, because if you can, can I have a list of some prices? -- The Zombiebaron 20:10, 14 April 2007 (UTC)

"baby making wand". Now I understand. Gross. --Sir Modusoperandi ^Boinc! 20:16, 14 April 2007 (UTC)

~~ OK, I really like this idea. The only thing that doesn't work for me is the gas pump. Have you though about working a turkey baster into this? Dame GUN PotY WotM 2xPotM 17xVFH VFP Poo PMS •YAP• 00:13, 15 April 2007 (UTC)

YAY! I fixed it up quite a bit. How do you like it now? so sayeth Sliferjam ~ Talk * Sock * Jam * Gallery * Fearless Fosdick? 16:10, 25 April 2007 (UTC)

The border around the beaver looks odd. The tinfoilishness is freaking me out. Try losing the tinfoil and just showing the beav'. Which, curiously, is the last thing I said at the peelers before they kicked me out. But now I've said too much. --Sir Modusoperandi ^Boinc! 17:44, 25 April 2007 (UTC)

Actually I think that Modus might have hit the nail on the head - perhaps the plastic pussy is too bright and shiny looks nothing mine which has had a number of children pass through it as they were born - have you though about placing an image of a real beaver there? Dame GUN PotY WotM 2xPotM 17xVFH VFP Poo PMS •YAP• 23:37, 25 April 2007 (UTC)

It was better without out the Citi logo and rhinestone flesh-light deposite shield. The less complex your picture is, the more funny. --AmericanBastard 03:51, 27 April 2007 (UTC)

First of all, PP, eww. Now to business. First they tell me to spoof a bank logo, then to remove it. Grr. I may remove the metal thing. It is actually a metal picture frame turned upside down. I'll put something better there. As for the, err, deposits place, I think more sterile looking, more better. It couldn't make it as a *heavenly sounds* 'Featured Image' if it is too pornographic. Maybe a recolouring is in order? Maybe a darker skin tone, or how about green or blue? so sayeth Sliferjam ~ Talk * Sock * Jam * Gallery * Fearless Fosdick? 13:05, 27 April 2007 (UTC)

Green or blue?! I think my testicles just retracted into my abdomen. Yup, they're hiding. Thanks a lot. Now my gonch feel all loose. Bastard. --Sir Modusoperandi ^Boinc! 13:27, 27 April 2007 (UTC)