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Uncyclopedia:Anniversaries/December 30

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Always Kills Governments, Always!

December 30: Last Chance To Do All The Things You Wanted To Do This Year Day

  • 4004 BC - God remembers to create the Earth. Oh, and everything else, too. Except for sliced bread.
  • 4 BC - Emperor Augustus remembers he was gonna have a census this year! Having missed his opportunity, he proclaims, "Let there be a day upon which all things previously contemplated throughout the last year finally be at once accomplished! Except for tomorrow. But shhhh!" Thus, the "Last Chance To Do All The Things You Wanted To Do This Year Day" was inaugurated.
  • 41 - Calligraphy, the gayest of Roman emperors, forgot to sign the will making his goat the next emperor thus ensuring the slavery of goats for two and a half millennia.
  • 1037 - King Arthur loses the holy grail to Nigerian timeshare scammers, crusades ensue.
  • 1609 - King Charles the III of Lorraine dies, but nobody cares.
  • 1928 - Fart was discovered to be a wave not a partical since two people at two different places can smell it at the same time.
  • 1999 - Procrastinators think about preparing for the Y2K bug, but put it off until December 31.
  • 2002 - Saddam Hussein realises he forgot to send George Bush a Christmas card.
  • 2004 - Weren't we gonna start a parady of wickerpedialyte? Yeah? Shit! Better luck next year.
  • 2005 - Forget it! If it ain't done, wait 'til next year.
  • 2005.8 - The letter "U" is now a bad word.
  • 2006 - Saddam Hussein executed for forgetting to send Bush a Christmas card. Again.
  • 2007 - Some guy decided to add his own entry in the anniversaries section before the year is out, but nobody cares.
  • 2007 - This entry was not added. Except in error, and other minor US towns.
  • 2012 -- The Mayans remember to end the world with a BANG!
  • 2017 - Wal★Mart sends in the Giant Smiley to crush the government of Botswana in order to create one giant store next to the redneck country South Africa.
  • 2541 - Goats regain their freedom thus changing December 30 from "Last Chance To Do All The Things You Wanted To Do This Year Day" to "Goatcheese Liberation Front and Gift Packet Day" (except in New Guinea).
December

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