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Uncyclopedia:Anniversaries/August 22

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August 22: Obvious Day (24-hour period to celebrate the recognition of things which are readily apparent)

CaptObviousTitanic.jpg
  • 1492 - First encounter between Native Americans and Europeans. "I think these guys are up to no good," the local shaman remarks after being promptly shot.
  • 1717 - Spanish troops land on Sardinia. Having forgotten the can opener, they promptly leave.
  • 1939 - The Third Reich and the Nazis continue their march across Europe. This is bad.
  • 1940 - As the Germans invade Belgium, a local looks up from his waffles and remarks "This seems somehow familiar."
  • 1945 - Nazis defeated. This is good.
  • 1948 - Jewish state of Israel founded in the predominantly Arab Middle East. This will later cause problems.
  • 1966 - Captain Obvious is born. Doctor proclaims, "It's a boy," because the child has a penis.
  • 1973 - Brutal, murderous dictator Augusto Pinochet takes control over Chile. "I bet the CIA is helping this guy," says a random intellectual just before being abducted by a group of soldiers in black helicopters.
  • 2012 - People actually acknowledge that the Titanic was in fact not unsinkable.
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