UnPoetia:Hobbits Are Not Gay

Poetry for people who hate poetry

Hobbits are not gay.

Neither are these two.

Hobbits are not gay,

no, they just act that way.

Hobbits, they most truly are not gay.

It may seem suggestive

when they're acting all festive

and hugging and kissing and shit

But please be aware

that they're not in an affair

those are all just some things they permit.

Hobbits are not gay,

no, they just act that way.

Hobbits, they most truly are not gay.

When Frodo cries, "Sam!"

You may say, "Oh, damn!"

But what he really meant by that was "Hip-hip hooray!"

And even Gandalf raises fears,

But he's straight as well, my dears.

No one's really homo, okay?

Hobbits are not gay,

no, they just act that way.

Hobbits, they most truly are not gay.

So let it be known,

that you can go home,

knowing that those hobbits are not gay.