UnNews:State of the Union Address affected by Writers' strike

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30 January 2008

George W. Bush apologizes for not having speech prepared.

WASHINGTON, DC -- The nation suffered yet another blow in the midst of the ongoing Writers' strike that has affected a large number of TV shows, movies, and award shows. The strike led to the cancellation of this year's State of the Union Address, as President Bush's speech writer, Jon Stewart, was striking. However, since the Address is mandated in the Constitution, Bush had to do something to fill the hour-long timeslot.

The President entered the room to a chorus of applause and "Good riddance!" outbursts as he approached the podium. He then apologized by saying,

Cquote1.png My stupid writer went on strike! Now we're all screwed! Hey, how about I tell you some jokes I heard on TV the other night? Cquote2.png

Bush then made a joke about ET and Mr. T having a baby, which was funnier when it was told on that Simpsons episode. Then he went on to steal jokes from Def Comedy Jam and South Park. About a half hour later, once the "Boos" simmered down, the 43rd President did the unthinkable (see the clip below).

President Bush attempts to fill time during the State of the Union Address

When Secret Service agents kicked him offstage, Bush responded with, "This is why I don't write my own speeches. Good night, America."

Since there was still an hour left to fill, Congress and the rest of America was treated to reruns of ER, House, Two and a Half Men, Family Guy, I Love Lucy, and Happy Days, depending on which station you were watching. Bush ended the speech with by saying, "Too bad I didn't get to tell any of those Mr. Winkler jokes I saw on Uncyclopedia." He was later informed that Jimbo Wales had prevented the jokes from being made public after reaching a consensus to end the Winkler phenomenon.

The State of the Union Address was simulcast on all stations at 9:00 P.M. EST.




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