UnNews:Point-Counterpoint:Should American health care reform include a public option?

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22 October 2009

Point: American health care reform should include a public option.[edit]

By Evelyn Carnahan

George W. Bush, here pictured not caring about black people.

The time has come for a universal health care plan in America that includes a public option. The reason is very simple. For the last eight years, America suffered through an Administration that cared about nothing other than oil and fundamentalist Christianity. In fact, Bush once told Jacques Chirac that he attacked Iraq because we were facing an ultimate battle for the souls of humanity, and it was time to defeat Gog and Magog. Bush killed millions of people for his crazy fundamentalist beliefs, and for oil. And he spent trillions of dollars doing it. And when Bush wasn't killing people and spending trillions of dollars, he was clearing brush at his ranch. That's right: we hired a President, and he spent like three quarters of his Presidency clearing brush at his ranch. We pay that man's salary, you know. Two hundred thousand dollars a year. That's coming out of my tax dollars, and yours. Or, it was.

The opponents of a public option have dubbed themselves "tea partiers," which makes them sound gay. They must not have realized that when they dangle those little tea bags around, they look like balls. They are generally uneducated and their hygiene is poor. They're essentially a group of ignorant fundamentalists. And look who leads them! Rush Limbaugh? With his three divorces and his pill popping? Bill O'Reilly? With his incredible, over-the-top ego and his habit of sexually harassing anything in a skirt?

Have you ever noticed how many Republicans are embroiled in sex scandals? John Ensign! Mark Sanford! These men preach family values, but in the end they abandon their families to chase after mistresses. They're hypocrites. It's not that I mind that they have sex. Everyone has sex. It's the hypocrisy that bothers me.

In conclusion, the time for a public option is now.

Counterpoint: A public option is bad for America.[edit]

By Michael Dober

Barack Obama, here associating with one of his many radical racist terrorist secret Muslim pals.

Obama. It's an acronym for "One Big-Ass Mistake, America." And now Obama is trying to sell us a health care plan with a public option. Well, let me ask you this: what do we really know about Obama?

As the great Ronald Reagan once said, "It's not that liberals are ignorant, it's that they know so much that isn't so." And Obama apparently "knows" that he was born in Hawaii, but he's repeatedly refused requests to produce his birth certificate. The fact is, Obama was born in Kenya, raised by Muslims, and is still to this day a radical Muslim. Islam has declared war with America. Remember the attacks of September 11, 2001? Yet Barack Obama is taking a policy of appeasing these Islamic leaders. He even bowed to the Shiek of Saudi Arabia, because he was paying homage to his Islamic superior. And his middle name is Hussein. As in Saddam Hussein, who was planning to attack us shortly before 2003, when we bravely fought back.

Also, Obama is a Socialist. At one point, he said he was going to "spread the wealth around." Well, spreading the wealth around is fundamentally un-American. America is about clinging to the wealth and not letting anyone have it. Let me put it to you this way: Hitler. Stalin. Mussolini. Mao Tse Tung. You know what they had in common? They're commi-lib fascists, just like Barack Hussein Obama.

Obama comes from the Chicago political machine. Chicago is corrupt, and above all, liberal. It has gang violence, and anyone who disagrees with Obama is labeled a racist by the commi-lib fascist government. And what exactly is a "community organizer," anyway? That's what I'd like to know. There are far too many unanswered questions about this shadowy figure. Put down the Kool-Aid and wake up, America!

In conclusion, health care in America should not include a public option.