UnNews:Oscar nominations 2018

From Uncyclopedia, the content-free encyclopedia
Jump to navigation Jump to search

Thursday, January 25, 2018


Who's gonna win a 90-year-old naked dude this year?

HOLLYWOOD, California -- The Academy Award nominations were announced Tuesday and Hollywood is finally buzzing about something other than "Which respected celebrity is gonna be accused of something horrible next?" or "What's Trump gonna tweet next?"

Here's the list of stuffy British costume dramas nobody's ever heard of that will be competing for the Oscar in its 90th year.

Best Picture[edit | edit source]

Best Lead Actor[edit | edit source]

Best Lead Actress[edit | edit source]

Best Supporting Actor[edit | edit source]

Best Supporting Actress[edit | edit source]

  • Mary J. Blige - Mudbound
  • Allison Janney - I, Tonya
  • Leslie Manville - Star Wars Episode XXXVII: The Phantom Thread
  • Laurie Metcalf - Lady Bird
  • Octavia Spencer - The Shape of Water

Best Animated Feature[edit | edit source]

Best Cinematography[edit | edit source]

  • Sergei Blutarski - The Pee Tape
  • Roger Deakins - Blade Runner 2049
  • Bruno Delbonnel - Darkest Hour
  • Hoyte Van Hoytema - Dunkirk
  • Rachel Morrison - Mudbound
  • Dan Loustsen - The Shape of Water

Costume Design[edit | edit source]

Best Director[edit | edit source]

  • Sergei Blutarski - The Pee Tape
  • Christopher Nolan - Dunkirk
  • Jordan Peele - Get Out
  • Greta Gerwig - Lady Bird
  • Paul Thomas Anderson (ghost directed by George Lucas) - Star Wars Episode XXXVII: The Phantom Thread
  • Guillermo Del Toro & Ed Sheeran - The Shape of Water

Best Documentary Feature[edit | edit source]

  • Abacus: Something, Something Jail
  • Faces Places
  • Icarus
  • Last Men in Aleppo
  • The Pee Tape
  • Strong Island

Best Documentary (short subject)[edit | edit source]

Who cares?

Best Editing[edit | edit source]

  • Baby Driver
  • Dunkirk
  • I, Tonya
  • The Pee Tape
  • The Shape of Water
  • There Will Be Blood on Three Billboards Outside Blah, Blah, Blah, Missouri for Old Men

Best Film from a Shithole Country[edit | edit source]

  • A Fantastic Woman - Chile
  • The Insult - Lebanon
  • On Body and Soul - Hungary
  • The Pee Tape - Russia
  • The Square - Sweden

Makeup & Hairstyling[edit | edit source]

  • Darkest Hour
  • The Pee Tape
  • Queen Victoria & Paula Abdul
  • Wonder (not Woman)

Original Score[edit | edit source]

  • Hans Zimmer - Dunkirk
  • John Williams - The Pee Tape; Star Wars Episode XXXVII: The Phantom Thread
  • Ed Sheeran - The Shape of Water
  • Carter Burwell - There Will Be Blood on Three Billboards Outside Blah, Blah, Blah, Missouri for Old Men

Original Song[edit | edit source]

  • "Fake News" from The Pee Tape - Music by Elton John, lyrics by Tim Rice
  • "Mighty River" from Mudbound - Music and lyrics by Mary J. Blige, Raphael Saadiq and Taura Stinson
  • "Mystery of Love" from Call Me By Your Name - Music and lyrics by Sufjan Stevens
  • "Redbone" from Get Out - Music and lyrics by Donald Glover
  • "Remember Me" from Coco - Music and lyrics by whoever wrote "Let It Go"
  • "Shape of You" from The Shape of Water - Music and lyrics by Ed Sheeran, Steve Mac, Johnny McDaid, Kandi Burruss, Tameka Cottle, and Kevin Briggs
  • "Stand Up For Something" from Marshall - Music by Diane Warren, lyrics by Lonnie R. Lynn and Diane Warren
  • "That Isn't Me" from The Pee Tape - Music by Elton John, lyrics by Tim Rice and Donald Trump

Production Design[edit | edit source]

  • Beauty and the Beast
  • Blade Runner 2049
  • Darkest Hour
  • Dunkirk
  • The Pee Tape
  • The Shape of Water

Animated Short Film[edit | edit source]

Who cares?

Best Live Action Short[edit | edit source]

Meh.

Sound Editing[edit | edit source]

  • Baby Driver
  • Blade Runner 2049
  • Dunkirk
  • The Pee Tape
  • The Shape of Water
  • Star Wars Episode XXXVII: The Phantom Thread

Sound Mixing (Don't ask me what the difference is)[edit | edit source]

  • The exact same movies as Sound Editing

Visual Effects[edit | edit source]

Best Plagiarized Screenplay[edit | edit source]

Best Original Screenplay[edit | edit source]

Sources[edit | edit source]

Retrieved from "https://en.uncyclopedia.co/w/index.php?title=UnNews:Oscar_nominations_2018&oldid=5968422"