UnNews:Natalie Portman no longer Jew of the Year

From Uncyclopedia, the content-free encyclopedia
Jump to navigation Jump to search

Saturday, April 21, 2018

UnNews Logo Potato.png

ISRAEL -- Israeli-American actress Natalie Portman was the winner of the 2018 Jew of the Year award, for about a day, until she decided not to come to Israel to receive the award. Her decision was, in her words, due to "the recent events" in Israel. The award will be given instead to Jewish-Ukrainian actress Mila Kunis, in order to annoy Portman, who co-starred with Kunis in the Curb Your Enthusiasm episode, "The Black Swan". In the episode, Leon is having an affair with Natalie, since he is a huge fan of the movie Leon, and he likes pretending he is Leon from the movie Leon. In the meantime, Larry has a huge fight with Natalie over the Israeli-Palestinian conflict: Larry says Israel is allowed to defend itself from Hamas, who use thousands of demonstrating citizens as a cover to get terrorists inside Israel, while Natalie says Israel should just let those terrorists in.

Since this article includes Mila Kunis, it will not make much sense. Which makes sense, because this article is also about Natalie Portman not coming to Israel. For not letting terrorists inside it. Is Natalie the real terrorist? What was Mila's roll in that episode? Good questions. They will not be answered, since this is a Mila Kunis article. And nothing is more important than Mila Kunis. Not Natalie. Not the black swan. Not Israel's 70th Independence Day. Not Palestine's 70th Holocaust Day. Not the actual Mila Kunis article. Not the actual Holocaust. Nothing.

Sources[edit | edit source]

Mila kunis 1 .jpg
Mila Kunis
Wife of
Ashton
Co-starred in Black Swan with
Natalie, an actress
and
Not Jew of the Year 2018