UnNews:Mr. Agdwgdwgwango found responsible of stealing two disks with the bank details of 25 million people.
|
This article is part of UnNews, your source for up-to-the-picosecond misinformation. |
22 November 2007
George Norman Agdwgdwgwango is found responsible of the theft of two disks with the bank account details of 25 million people with the aid of a HM Revenue and Customs employee[edit | edit source]
George Agdwgdwgwango, a popular and respected member of the 'Ugandan Jim'll Fix It Appreciation Society', credited for his work on the popular television series fonejacker, was discovered stealing two disks with the bank account details of 25 million people with the aid of a HM Revenue and Customs (HMRC) junior assistant.
Mr. Agdwgdwgwango admitted telephoning Mr. T. Axman a junior assistant working for HM Revenue and Customs (HMRC) on the 20th of November, to arrange for the bank account details to be sent to Agdwgdwgwango via courier, defying all regulations of HM Revenue and Customs (HMRC).
Axman claims that Agdwgdwgwango illuded him with the reward of "monies" if he agreed to send the details to him. "Good aftanoon, sir. I'm calling you to inform you of your winnings of a cash prize! According to the computa, you have won 1,000,000 Ugandan dollars. I will wire you the monies directly but first I need bank account details from you. I need your details and with new regulations in place I require an additional 25 million peoples bank account details for me to wire you the monies directly" Agdwgdwgwango illedgedly told Axman over the phone call.
"So, basically, sir, If you could send me the bank account details, via courier, I will be able to transfer you the monies directly into your bank account" Agdwgdwgwango told Axman.
Agdwgdwgwango yesterday flew from The International Airport of Uganda arriving at Heathrow this morning to collect the disks. Agdwgdwgwango took the tube to Central London to meet Axman. As he boarded the tube he was pinned down to the floor by several police officers where he was shot five times in the head and killed. Police claim they thought he was a terror suspect, carrying explosives and took immediate action. "We thought he looked abit foreign" P.C Plod told reporters.
Gordon Brown took back his apology in Parliament and stated "It is quite clear that I'm not to blame for all of this so I suggest to you David Cameron, that you fuck off and go ride your bicycle around the block a few times, maybe listen to some arctic monkeys, you PR-worshiping cunt. No need for you to come up with policy because after all people only really give a shit about what bands you listen to."
"Well atleast I don't have a face like a slapped arse" retorted Cameron.
Sources claim that the government and tory back-benchers began chanting "fight! fight! fight!" and violence broke out following this. We are lead to believe that both Cameron and Brown sustained heavy casualties following the event.