UnNews:Leeds melts thanks to 188 degree C heatwave

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22 July 2006

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LEEDS, ENGLAND - The BBC has reported that the United Kingdom's third largest city, Leeds (formerly Wires-on-sea), is currently suffering thanks to a 188°C heatwave. Eyewitness reports list countless numbers of people spontaneously combusting, and that the city is in danger of melting if the heatwave gets much worse. Readers currently trapped in the midst of the heatwave are advised to run out of the building they are currently in, as your house/office/Internet-enabled public toilet currently has a 99.42% chance of melting, leaving you trapped amongst the melted bricks/computing equipment/shit. Readers currently in the great Leedsian countryside are advised to keep moving to avoid catching SEHS or SIDS.

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