UnNews:Ionechat.com girls 'depressing and lifeless'

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18 September 2013

What happens when you type girl into Uncyclopedia's image search.

Canadian dating website Ionechat.com has been criticised by its male clients who claim that women found on the site were "lifeless and depressing".

The Ottawa-based company, which advertises heavily on Facebook with the promising slogan "Find love in Canada" (and what man hasn't dreamed of doing that at one point?) has refused to comment, but an insider from Facebook has spoken to UnNews.

"This is a gross violation of our policy" he said. "Facebook's popularity is based on the vague prospect of having sex with someone, so any dating service whose girls are not up to scratch will be immediately taken down."

Ironically, Facebook has itself become aplatform for users' complaints, with some setting up groups such as Ionechat.com girls are dead boring, which has 412 members. One post there read, "I was expecting a conversation with a typically hot, smokin' range of Vancouver chicks... but none of those bitches even replied to my messages."

Another wrote, "I clicked on this girl's profile and it was just depressing shit about how boys at her school were bullying her and how she was going to end it all."

"In the end, I got so down, I just did an image search for the word 'girl' and set up my own dating agency."

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