That time I threw my own poop at monkeys during my sojourn in a zoo

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Dude, those fucking things were huge. Like, WTF?

They looked kinda like this, only fucking psycho.

So there I was[edit | edit source]

giving a lecture in the fucking zoo, doing my Anthropology thing with the Primate shit and the graduate students, right? Like, scientific badass shit.

and these four fucking monkeys[edit | edit source]

bursts out of the trees, poop all over their hands, and instead of going for the graduate students, they throw their poop straight at me.

so I pulled down my[edit | edit source]

pants and shit in my own hands, and then I returned fire! WTF?

I barely got away with a major ruined reputation and a several public indecency charges.

No, seriously. I threw my own poop at monkeys.

See also[edit | edit source]