Talk:Aesop's Fables

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Sorry if I sound like a cranky old bastard, but if anyone wants to add to this, could they pick one of the dozens of real Aesop's fables and make fun of it rather than messing with the punchlines - er, I mean morals - of the existing ones? Thanks --Cap'n Ben 10:28, 3 Jul 2005 (UTC)

Yeah, the ones that actually make sense and that are based off an actual fable are the only funny ones. Except the Wolf in Sheep's Clothing. That one, based off a punchline, was actually funny.

Candidate for inclusion[edit source]

The Sun and the North Wind[edit source]

The Sun and the North Wind were arguing over who was the strongest. Presently, a young woman came by. "Let us settle this with a contest," said the North Wind. "The first to disrobe that woman shall be proclaimed the strongest!" The North Wind blew and blew with all his might, but the woman held on tight to her clothing. "Now, I shall try," announced the Sun, and he shone with all his power. By now, the woman had twigged what was going on. She stopped, and turned to the Sun and the North Wind. "You sexist bastards!" she proclaimed. "You think that by brute force or intense heat you can get my clothes off? This is the 2000's! The age of empowerment! Get back to the 19th Century, you dinosaurs." The Sun glanced at the North Wind, reached into his pocket, pulled out a tight roll of twenty-dollar bills held together with an elastic band, and handed it to the young woman.

The North Wind agreed that the Sun was, indeed, the stronger of the two.

Moral: Um... money... does stuff? Didn't really bother thinking up a moral...

Moral: Can't get laid? Try paying the hooker, you moron. Of course she's going to fuck you for free. That's her job, right? God, you're an idiot. I hate you.

good


The Miller, His Son and His Ass[edit source]

A miller, his son and his ass were traveling to a neighboring fair in the hopes of selling the ass. They had not gone very far when they met with a troop of women collected round a well, talking and laughing. "Look there," cried one of them, "did you ever see such fellows, to be trudging along the road on foot when they might ride the ass?" The old man hearing this, quickly mounted the ass, and rode it the rest of the way to market.

Upon arriving, the Son said, "after you've ridden it all this way, father, do you think anyone will actually want to pay for my ass?"

Moral: Used merchandise always sells for less, if at all.