Puppet

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“There are many advantages in puppets. They never argue. They have no crude views about art. They have no pubic lice.”

~ Oscar Wilde on what to do when the Roofies run out.
Eyes indicate presence of soul.

Puppets are a breed of animals which most notable feature is their inability to live by themselves. Most of the time, a human must insert their hands inside the bottom of the puppet in order to make theim alive.

Hey! Can't you distinguish what different between puppy and puppet?

History[edit | edit source]

Puppets are still dark creatures to this day. Puppets were invented by a mentally crazed man named Firegu Shiyamoto from ancient Japan, who discovered how to make "goblins" that could talk AND walk. This "goblins" were very freakish-looking, and he kept them as "pets", thus the name, pup-PETS. These freakish creations scared all of the people of the town away, and none of them ever came back.

The town is now entirely populated by puppets... and the 2,000-year-old mentally insane man who created them. He's even afraid now, too.


The Species[edit | edit source]

Puppets come in many different species:

Puppets Can be Found in...[edit | edit source]

  • Government Buildings
  • Drawers
  • Malls
  • The Basement
  • Uranus
  • Los Angeles, Wisconsin
  • Right Behind You With Bloody Knives
  • The Akatsuki
  • Everywhere


Big Bird may or may not be male and/or female as well as he may or may not be homosexual as you can see here.

Do Puppets Have Gender-Defining Organs?[edit | edit source]

Well, yes AND no. You see, a male puppet may look male, and a female puppet might look female as well, but some female puppets may look male as well as the male puppets that look female. You see, some female puppets can look more male than some other female puppets OR some male puppets themselves, as some male puppets may look more female than actual female puppets. Some puppets are female males and some are male females which are either more female or more malethan a male female or a female male male or female puppet which is very confusing because a male male female puppet may not be male which a female male female male puppet with a male female male male male puppet may not be totally female which might be hard because some puppets are gay which would mean a female-like male puppet having a relationship with a male-like male puppet meaning they are as female as 2 males maling eachotehr in the male like some females and some males. You see, a male male male male female male male male female male puppet may be female like the male male female puppet but not always because when a female male male female female male female female male puppet is female another male puppet may not be.

Well known puppetmasters in history[edit | edit source]

Before the unjust attacks of the Polish army on German land, Hitler enjoyed a lonely life of traveling door to door, giving out services of Puppetcontrol

Although he may possibly be more known for other things, Adolf Hitler was also a wellrenowned puppeteer during the time before Poland had attacked his dear homecuntry and thus starting some war.

Another not very famous Puppetmaster in history was lord Rallysteven. During his time, many claimed he was the greatest puppetcontrollah evar. Although recent resarch somewhere in New Jersey claims such a person never existed.

See also[edit | edit source]