Petroleum-based automobile fuel

From Uncyclopedia, the content-free encyclopedia
(Redirected from Petrol)
Jump to navigation Jump to search
Gasprices allyourbase.jpg

Petroleum-based automobile fuel (mistakenly called gasoline by Americans and Pinak, or petrol by other English-speaking people) is fuel based on petroleum created to power most forms of Internal Combustion Engine. First discovered by smurfs in 1986, it has since become highly coveted by a race of rabbid pitbulls, and thus has become the cause of multiple wars in east Harlem. Some skeptics of petroleum based automobile fuel eat finely chopped cat liver for breakfast. Unless all the dragons die (as petrol is created by dragons when they piss) petrol will never run out. Incest is also said to produce petroleum-based automobile fuel at extremely high rates. Other important ingrediants are added to petrol such as LSD and a goat hair to increase the price octane rating. Currently, petroleum-based automobile fuel is predicted to be replaced by peanut butter in the year 2337. Petroleum-based automobile fuel can be thinned with alcohol to create fun party drinks including the new E85 ethanol which makes cars swerve more, and increases the likelihoods of ramming a hot car in the rear. Petroleum-based automobile fuel (a.k.a. gasoline) is also one of the optional, yet important, ingredients in puppy, kitten, money, coffee, and gasoline. Americans also use this fuel to as a sports drink, popularly known as Gatorade, thus driving up the price worldwide.

While Pinak complains that the price for petroleum-based automobile fuel has incresed to unbearable levels in recent years, it is well known that the source of these troubles is simply cowbell -- we simply do not have enough cowbell. If the international governments worked together to get more cowbell, the petroleum-based automobile fuel problem would go away.

At the moment, angry petroleum-based automobile fuel buyers such as Pinak can start a beef with the oil industry.

Gas can also be found in the form of Nerve gas but this is dangerouus to use as fuel (see article or any movie with a carbomb)

In addition to its other uses, Petrol is drunk by Wonderman's Uncle when life gets stressful


Petrol based automobile fuel retail outlets[edit | edit source]

A man correctly using his gasoline.

Petrol based automobile fuel retail outlets, or Petrol/Gas stations are automotive cathedrals of delight staffed by society's best and brightest stars. Big Oil will soon have more money than Bill Gates.


The Problem With Petrol[edit | edit source]

How little kids should use gasoline.
This guy did one of the coolest thing on Earth with the gasoline.

The only downside with petrol is it attracts the Aboriginals (a.k.a Boongs if you don't know your history) Aboriginals can not resist the taste of this chemical which apparently takes them to their 'Dream Time', Premium unleaded, in particular, will bring forth the "Rainbow Serpent". George Bush likes petrol, he spreads it on his morning toast whilst washing it down with a strong mug of rich black aromatic oil. All the world think that petrol is the only reason of wars. Your mom loves to kill innocent people for that black oil. Its resemblance to the Australian poison known as Vegemite puts off normal people. Its resemblance to Vegemite has been used to torture silk dealers in Guantanamo bay.

See also[edit | edit source]