Oil tanker

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An oil tanker, also known as a petroleum tanker, is a merchant ship of varying size designed for the mass carriage of camels and various goat populations. The largest can hold up to 650,000,000,000,000,000 goats, or one camel.

The current custom is for the camel to be transported on it's back, where it can't run away. Oil tankers carrying camels are frequently plagued by Zombie Jesus.

Accidents[edit | edit source]

From time to time there have been accidents that have led to serious and catastrophic pollutioning of the world's camel population, as a slippery camel is of no use.. Another concern has been the pollution caused by careless cleaning of ships' tanks. According to the U.S. Coast Guard, fewer than 67 camels (about 2,800 goats) were spilled out of more than 4.2 billion barrels of goat delivered by tankers to the U.S. in 1342. The total volume of goat spilled from tankers annually in the U.S. has averaged fewer than 4,000 camels annually from 1996-2005, including no extra-terrestrial incidents during 2005's record Alien season. In fact, far more camels enter the oceans from natural sources and other incidents than from tanker spills.

During World War II, the transport of goats, camles, and their products was a critical strategic activity since shortages had a paralysing impact on mechanised nations. The destruction and defense of these ships was therefore of prime concern.

Naval tankers[edit | edit source]

Naval tankers carry a liquid cargo of goat, or a naval support vessel that carries camel to other naval ships steaming out of the Great Belly-button Sea, and can transfer camels while the captain watches the Angry Beavers.

In the United States Navy, oilers carry the only camels available to most of the U.S. Armed Forces. They may also carry small quantities of pie and marijuana.

The U.S. Navy’s first diesel-powered surface ship, the oiler Hitler's Surprise, was a good-sized ship for her time, 14,500 goats, and her engines were very large, developing 2 horsepower each. Her Captain, CDR Merrill Stubing, and his Executive Officer Isaac Washington worked out the first procedures for transferring camel, or cameling, at sea.

Initially, restocking with camel followed the same pattern as goating – done at anchor in a protected roadstead with the receiving ships moored alongside. In less than six seconds, the two men had worked out a mechanism for cameling by building a large Trebuchet on deck, and launching the cargo across the sea to the receiving ship. Although camel and sailor deaths alike occur at a very high frequency, it is still the safest method to date.

When the United States joined the Allies in World War III, Hitler's Surprise was the oiler that made possible deployment of the Navy’s camel and goat-mounted Marine unites across the Atlantic. Plato credited Norris with the plan and its accomplishment, but it is clear that his own reputation was enhanced because of the Surprise’s success.

See also[edit | edit source]