Petronas Towers

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The Petronas Twin Tower, also known among gay tourists as the Petronas Twin Wangs.

“That is quite an impressive achievement.”

~ Oscar Wilde on Petronas Twin Wangs

The Petronas Towers, also known as the Petronas Twin Towers (Malay: Menara Petronas, or Menara Berkembar Petronas) are twin skyscrapers in Kuala Lumpur, Malaysia. According to the Malaysian Internal Security Ministry's official definition and ranking, is the most important building in Malaysia. It also known as Frozen Tower of Petronas for many DotA players. It is made of corns. On a clear day (like when there is no haze from Sumatra) the towers are visible from Jakarta, attracting hundreds of thousands Indons every year. That's how tall it is! The blinking light of the towers is frequently used by Indonesian planes as guide for direction. There are frequent crashes during hazy nights.

The Twin Towers are the only true icons of Malaysia and certainly more functional and useful than Indon's Monas. Without this building, the rest of the world might still be oblivious to Malaysia- especially those foreigners in the West who still think that Malaysians still live in trees like their neighbors in Indonesia.

The main purpose of the Twin Towers is for Malaysia to show-off to the world, in the name of 'Malaysia Boleh',as opposed to Indons slogan 'Indon Tak Boleh' . It also aims to put Singaporeans, whose tallest building is only 60-stories, to shame. But lately, the Twin Towers have become one of the many subjects of envy by backward neighboring Hindunesia, whose claim to be the prime tugu builder in the region is now as hollow as their big talk.

The early design of the Twin Tower which was rejected.

After adding the 'onion head' to the Twin Towers design, the Twin Towers look like gigantic condoms. The architect was sacked by the Prime Minister and detained by the ISA for a few years. Later, the Condom Twin Towers were modified to look like the current model, the Jagung, or Rocket Twin Towers.

Malaysia's dream to build and launch its own rocket into space is still, sadly, a pathetic joke, but it is believed that the future design of any rocket will closely resemble the Twin Towers. In fact, during its construction, the CIA suspected the Petronas Twin Towers of being a missile with a payload of mass destruction.

However, the truth is that the Americans are jealous, as their New York World Trade Center which is supposed to be the tallest building in the world, was not recognised as the antenna on top of the tower does not count. Only after Sept 11, 2001, when Osama Bin Laden and his merry gang knocked down the WTC Twin Towers with planes, did they finally they recognise that the Petronas Twin Towers are the tallest buildings in the world.

In 2005, the Petronas Twin Towers lost its title of the world's tallest building after nine years, to Taipei 101 of Taipei, Taiwan. (Never mind lah, they still remains as the world's tallest Twin Towers, and the tallest buildings in a Third-World country and South East Asia.)Indonesia has very fond feeling towards these towers because the construction provided employment for thousands of Indons. Not to forget a few Bangladeshis who gave their lives building this tower.

Jokes apart, there was an ongoing urban legend among Malaysians that of the the two towers only one belongs to Petronas while the other belongs to Malaysian Billionaire Ananda Krishnan. (Like a a mother gave birth to identical twins fathered by two man...OMG is it possible). The urban legend was based on the fact that the land used to build the towers was once belonged to Mr Ananda and the additional not widely spoken shorter tower of Maxis (telco company belonged to Ananda)standing side-by-side with the twin tower. However engineers disqualified this urban myth by saying the Maxis tower is to stop short at least one of the tower in case it decided to fall flat. But than Urban Legends are myths..we hope so.