Kicking pigeons is FUN!
STUPID PIGEONS I HATE THEM!! they eat my bread, they eat my soup, they eat everything. HATE HATE HATE Stupid pigeons ruined my day. They stole my hat, they look like rats, they flew on my head and took my hat! I threw some stones at them but they flew away!
Those stupid pigeons ruined my day. They got chocolate ice cream on my trousers which were new! And I had to go home and change into sweat pants which have a big hole in them! And the pigeons shat on the hole! Stupid bastards!
KICK KICK KICK
Things to do with pigeons
- Kick them
- Murder them
- Torture them
- Burn them
- Shit on them
- Maul them
- Spit at them
- Eat them
- Cook them
- Throw things at them
- Steal their hat
Sometimes the dumb pigeons come up to me and they think I have food but I never do!!
Because I want the pigeons to die and I want to see them suffer!! And the pigeons smell like trash and they make poop on my shoes and I had to get new shoes!! And I hate shopping so much!! Stupid pigeons never get new shoes but I do!!
I collect dead pigeons in my closet and they are bloody but it makes me happy to see dead pigeons!! I want all pigeons to die and I will take all the dead pigeons and hang them up in my room on the wall!! And every night before I go to sleep I will look at the dead pigeons and think that there are no more pigeons anymore!!
Oh yeah, sometimes I go to this restaurant near my house and they serve roasted pigeon. But some dumb organization called the American Birding Association had a protest and the restaurant closed down. And now it's a Burger King!!
So I decided I'm going to kill all the pigeons and i'm going to shut down the ABA! I made these cool Bristol boards that said "PIGEONS MUST DIE" and I went and I started a protest at the park! And a few pigeons came up to me and I kicked them in the face!!
But nobody liked it and some fat lady kept complaining to me that pigeons have a right to live and that I was a bad person!! But she was being stupid because pigeons are stupid and they should all die! The next day I started another protest to kill the fat lady but the fat lady saw and she sued me and I lost. It's the pigeon's faults!
Now I'm broke and I have to eat at KFC every day and it's all the stupid pigeon's fault! Pigeons are good for one thing and one thing only and that is being dead pigeons! If you see a pigeon, kick them in the face!