Photography

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Photography is a style of ultra-realist art which became popular during the nineteenth century.

The War of Photographic Aggression[edit | edit source]

During the twentieth century photography fought a bloody battle with non-realist styles of painting such as expressionism and cartoons. It is widely believed to have been one of the bloodiest wars in human history, involving many humans rights abuses on either side. One of the most notorious was the genocide of blue paint, after it declared alleigence to post-cartography (an anti-realist form of cartography once used by the Ordinance Survey). This war is often called The War of Photographic Aggression, but is known as The Cubist War in some parts of rural Angola.

Cold War Significance[edit | edit source]

During the cold war, the Soviet Union spent many years desperately trying to catch up to the west. They developed their own form of photography, known as Soviet Realism, which was partially inspired by the earlier attempt of Nazi Realism. Soviet Realism failed to catch on in the west due to its dull subject matter, such as dock-yards, women in overalls, and hardcore pornography. Photography provides an excellent example of how the two superpowers mostly battled it out in other countries, mostly Africa. Due to the increasing importance of pictures, many militia in African countries were backed by one of the two sides. In return, they would help develop pictures taken by their sponsor, thus explaining the origin of the term 'developing countries'.

Techniques[edit | edit source]

Photography usually begins with a sketch, made by an incredibly small artist inside a metal or plastic box. This sketch is then taken to a printing lab where it is elaborated by a larger, and consequently more skilled, artist. The larger artist is able to add colours, something which can't fit inside the small box. The small artist uses a complex shading method to denote the colour which the large artist should add.

Digital photography[edit | edit source]

Recent developments in artistic training have lead to digital photography. This is a form of photography in which the large artist is replaced by a medium-sized artist who can fit inside a home PC. The reason this is now possible is that the training of medium-sized artists no longer involves cutting off their fingers (or digits) hence the name digital photography.

The Death of Photography[edit | edit source]

It is expected that photography will die out sometime in the twenty-second century due to either heart failure, or the superiority of Neo Soviet Realism.

See also[edit | edit source]