HowTo:Make an illegal bet

From Uncyclopedia, the content-free encyclopedia
Jump to navigation Jump to search
Remember the stakes are high but the pay is higher

Okay the games starting in 3 hours, what do you want to do while we wait? What? You want to make an illegal bet? Well you're going to need some help.

Okay let's go see my "friend"[edit | edit source]

Yeah, I know a guy who could help us "take out the cake", if you know what I mean. How do I know him? Well he was the guy that was boning your stepsister last Halloween. What? Don't worry about it. He's gay... now.

Who are you going for?[edit | edit source]

What!? You forgot who the two teams were!? Oh my god! You really are an idiot! What? You think I remember? Of course I don't you dipshit! Wait maybe this guy knows...

Okay, now pay the man "for the cake"[edit | edit source]

What? You left your money at home? God dammit! Fine... drive home and get your money... But I'm going to kick your ass later!

Okay, finally...[edit | edit source]

You made it back here, you have your money, and you're going to vote for the Denver Pussies. Now how much are you going to place?

HALT DIRTBAG!![edit | edit source]

Yeah, that's right. I'm a cop. You are under arrest!!! What did you expect? I don't even know who you are. You just walk up to some random guy and ask to place a bet. I'm in uniform you idiot! God dammit!


See also[edit | edit source]