HowTo:Clickbait Properly

From Uncyclopedia, the content-free encyclopedia
Jump to navigation Jump to search

Clickbait. The ultimate form of the term "cancer." They give you all the views and the subs. But your form of clickbait isn't working. You're an idiot, unless you follow these easy steps to maximize ad revenue! This HowTo covers the following categories: Gaming, Commentary, and Story channels.

Step 1, add titles that are all in Caps and make it irrelevant along with the thumbnail[edit | edit source]

If a video is something like a Call of Duty Black Ops II "Microsoft Tech Support Scam" trolling about how "malware" can enter your Xbox 360, then say it is a trolling video, put everything in Caps. Make the thumbnail as eye catching as possible. If it's not trolling, make it as irrelevant af,

unless you're a commentary channel, then give out false responses A.K.A. Lie to people. Make it seem like it isn't staged if you're a "reaction" channel. Most of, if not, all of your videos' titles should end with "YOU WONT BELIEVE WHAT HAPPENS NEXT..."

Step 2, always plug the start of your videos with a "giveaway" of any choice relevant[edit | edit source]

(IE: Fidget Spinners, PS4s, Alienware gaming laptops, etc...)

You must tell the viewers to like your videos, subscribe to your channel, turn notifications on, and comment some random babble, more commonly "I Subscribed." If there are people who said your giveaways are fake, filter them out of the comment section. Make the item slightly relevant. Do not tell what day the giveaway ends. This may cause mass-flagging by disgruntled people who found out that your giveaway was fake.

Step 3, Upload the content that potentially maximize revenue[edit | edit source]

One of the most notable forms of clickbait right now is the "CALLING THE [INSERT TRENDING NAME HERE]!" It could be a cartoon character (most notably, the Boss Baby) a popular YouTuber (can't be too popular. must be between the 10,000 and the 700,000 subscriber mark) Rockstar Customer Support, ect... But it must be a trend.

Step 4, When caught red-handed, guilt-trip your fans into accepting your "apology."[edit | edit source]

This guy on Reddit made a long rant/expose post. Your fans are wondering why so many people are angry with you. Eventually, you're gonna need to make an apology video. Only apology videos can be exempted from steps 1 to 3. Apology videos must be staged. Crocodile tears can fool kids (who make up most of your audience.) and some adults. Trick the viewer into believing your half-assed sad excuse of an apology video. label "authentic criticism" as "haters." in order to direct the hating to criticism that is against you.

Step 5, make up fake stories or steal them[edit | edit source]

If you're a "story time channel," make up a fake story, but make it believable. The only signs that they're fake is when you have too much stories and/or the stories can be found elsewhere.

$tep $ix, Profit[edit | edit source]

What your channel should look like. This channel had mastered the art of the clickbait.

After a month, your house should be flooded with YouTube money (and Patreon money) And there you have it. If you were to follow all those steps with the optional Tips, you have became a clickbaiter. Now go have fun getting into drama and being reported by Scarce... wait, Scarce hasn't been on the internet for 3 weeks?! k, lemme change that... Now go have fun getting into drama and being reported by DramaAlert.