Game Maker

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How GML really works.

Game Maker is a kitchen utensil created by former Arsenal footballer Mark Overmars somewhere in Europe (location kept secret as it is rumoured that Microsoft is trying to get their hands on Game Maker to sell at an exorbitant price and cause even more crashes on thousands of PCs). Several different versions are available: a "lite" version for poor people, a "pro" version for pirates, and an all-powerful "staff" version which puts other Game Maker games to shame and causes much begging for an editable version to plagairise on the Game Maker forums.

History[edit | edit source]

Game Maker started like all computer software - crap and totally unheard of. Steadily things improved through several of the integers below 10 up until Game Maker 6.0. This is regarded by some as the finest Game Maker ever made. Which was true, as it was the latest one until Game Maker 7.0 and the latest version is always best (see Indiana Jones: Kingdom of the Crystal Skull for example). Control of Game Maker has been passed on to a British company, Yo Yo Games, as the previous company had stuffed up the accounts making Game Maker look in the grey and could use room for improvement.

Game Maker 8's drugged up logo.

As of November 27, 2009 the 12 year olds that run Yoyogames decided that a new logo was in order to continue making profits. Out of over 500 designs the CEO picked the logo that "is more modern, communicates the vitality and excitement of what Game Maker stands for and fits better with the rest of the YoYo Games Branding." After the winner was revealed the community at yoyogames went into a flaming frenzy and made Over 9000 different edits of the logo, effectively turning it into a meme. Game Maker and its community were ridiculed far and wide throughout the internets, resulting in gratuitous amounts of butthurt.

Making Games[edit | edit source]

How the most of the featured games aren't.

Game Maker comes with an in-built drawing program so you can scribble while stealing sprites off the internet to claim as your own. A variety of different editing effects mean that no-one will ever know that the graphics aren't yours. Clicking a button will make your game playable and stops others from stealing your already stolen graphics and sounds. Doing this also makes the file size three times larger and causes a large red blob to appear where your game should be. This is why Game Maker is awesome.

Yo Yo Games[edit | edit source]

This place is pretty much nothing like Newgrounds. Why? Because it doesn't have all the plagiarism, crappy Super Mario Bros clone submissions by 92-year-olds or yourself, and complete and hopeful projects that Newgrounds doesn't have..

According to legend, Yo Yo Games was once in a "golden age", but that time, if it ever existed, is obviously still here. The forums on the site are no longer riddled with bugs and glitches. It can even count how many posts there are, and the buttons set up to report bad posts don't work (i.e. we don't care but now they are fixed for some reason, those were just there to make it feel more like a forum).

See Also[edit | edit source]