February 17: Noble Gases Appreciation Day
- 1996 - Gary Kasparov loses a game of chess to a computer, like that's never happened to anyone before.
- 2001 - HAL 9000 kills two dudes in outer space, oh shit I'm sorry I spoiled it for you.
- 2006 - You finally forget about your miserable Valentine's Day, only to be tormented by this reminder.
- 2008 - USA bombs some country after the military finds a few extra bombs hiding in an old pair of pants.
- 2009 - John Prescott is discovered at the corner of downing street in a corset and fish-net tights attempting to whore himself out to passing single parents.
- 2017 - Denmark is officially recognized as a mistake and erased from history.
- 2018 - All world languages are revoked and replaced with American, a language consisting solely of words with one syllable or less