Detour to detour
We apologize for the inconvienience, but the page "Detour", due to a tour, is unusable, and we could not set up a redirect properly because of a robot invasion, so we set up this alternate page to describe what a detour is.
A detour is the opposite of a tour. It is where instead of traveling around the world, you try to stay at home. This is not to be confused with the idea that people are afraid of leaving their house.
Why people go on de-tours instead of tours[edit | edit source]
There are many reasons people go on tours. Bands sometimes go on live tours to perform in front of live audiences, some go on tour busses to explore historic sites and theme parks, while others waste their valuable money and risk their lives to terrorist attacks by exploring overrated sites prone to occupation.
"Overrated" is the key word here, because some people just find tours in general to be overrated. Instead of touring the Earth, the detourists explore their own world. Detourists are often found in their houses, withdrawn from the world.
Scientific Studies[edit | edit source]
Statistics show that more than 100% of detourists completely fail at detouring. This is because you can't actually explore your own world—it doesn't exist.
Despite the lack of your own world, and the lack of actual detourism, many detourists insist their world does exist, and that not only the real world, but in fact, your world, as well as you yourself, don't exist.
It is often asked by many—"How is that even possible?"
In 2005, a study was conducted by the Berkley, Delaware-based Christian organization, Berkley, Delaware Soccer Moms, to see how many child fans of the cartoons they target were detourism adherents. They asked the kids how they felt about the real world and the worlds of the cartoons they watch. Many of the kids stated that they would rather be in the cartoon worlds. They concluded—just from the children alone, that all cartoon fans were detourists.
Detours VS. "Alternative Path"[edit | edit source]
If you came across this article looking for the article on detours, but instead, were redirected to "Alternatives", who had a "whoops!" banner leading to this page, you may think that you were given a "detour". Contrary to popular belief, however, "detours" do not refer to "alternative paths" that you are sent on when the normal road is blocked off. This is a lie!
The word "detour" comes from the Mesopotamian words, "Dee-Dee", which translates to "not", and "Touwre", which means "exploring". The words together mean "not exploring". Not to mention, "detour" is simply "de" plus "tour".
We're sorry if you came looking for an article on the so-called "detours", or alternative paths. Please take this detour.
Sorry, n00b! You were de-toured into the wrong location! Maybe you should try ACTUAL detourism if you actually want an Uncyclopedia article on alternative roads.