Protected page
This article was one of the Top 10 articles of 2017

Deconstruction barrel

From Uncyclopedia, the content-free encyclopedia
Jump to navigation Jump to search
While not being a deconstruction barrel, this here image of an orange construction barrel lifted from Uncyclopedia's Orange construction barrels article can certainly serve several simultaneous purposes, such as being an approximate illustration of this article's high concept, an indication of the laziness of the author of this tedious article (namely, appropriating somebody else's valuable contribution without proper attribution), or even as a symbol that more filler-text is (hopefully) in the process of being prepared to adequately pad this article to sufficient length to avert superficial similarity to a mere stub. Also, notice that the flashing light assembly on top of the barrel is noticeably bent, as if it had already suffered some slight damage from being hit by a careless motor vehicle. I sincerely doubt that the flashing light itself is still functioning properly.

In internet literature, a deconstruction barrel is a stationary inert object set out in plain view as a visual indicator to oncoming internet traffic that an obsolete literary work is currently in the process of being demolished so its raw components may be thoroughly examined, and possibly refurbished and/or cannibalized for the production of some other literary project, or, more often than not, discarded as useless tripe.

Inadequate verbal description

Deconstruction barrels, in spite of their superficial resemblance to ordinary barrels, and like their brethren the venerable orange construction barrels, are almost never used to contain anything, other than, perhaps, some quantity of an inert high-density substance that serves to ballast them against strong gusts of wind. However, unlike the glaring radioactive orange hue of orange construction barrels, deconstruction barrels are painted in a large variety of cool and somber pastel colors, which, while looking charming to the untrained eye, ultimately convey little or no meaning in themselves.

Unimaginative derivation

The deconstruction barrel is, evidently, very much an unimaginative derivative of the original orange construction barrel. In fact, one can go so far as to say that whoever designed the original deconstruction barrel in the first place, instead of focusing on clearing space in preparation for a legitimate piece of literature, was more intent on parodizing either (a) Uncyclopedia's frankly ridiculous article on orange construction barrels, and/or (b) the original orange construction barrel itself. Well, perhaps parodizing is not quite the right word here.

The intent may be simple (and undeserved) mockery of Uncyclopedia's superficially-better article, which admittedly hasn't really been adequately examined in sufficient detail by the deconstruction crew on hand, given the deconstruction crew's far more important objectives, such as staking claim to yet another chunk of Uncyclopedia's free bandwidth, with little or no cost to themselves in terms of creative effort.

Dubious functionality

In spite of their warm friendly and eye-pleasing colors, a vast number of deconstruction barrels remain unused and neglected, primarily because a gigantic sign flashing DANGER DEMOLITION IN PROGRESS DANGER in alarmingly-bright yellow lights has proven 97% more effective in alerting drivers. Some people have said that the mere existence of the weak concept of deconstruction barrels is a completely inadequate justification for devoting an entire Uncyclopedia article to them, but those people have yet to be identified for proper citation. Also, given that Uncyclopedia already has an excellent article on the over-arching subject of deconstruction, utility of the supposably ubiquitous deconstruction barrel is cast even farther into doubt.

See also

Bloodyninjastar.png
Cream of the Crap
This article was one of the Uncyclopedia:Top 10 Articles of 2017
Top 10 articles of 2017
Potatohead aqua.png
Featured version: 6 April 2017
This article has been featured on the front page. You can vote for or nominate your favourite articles at Uncyclopedia:VFH.Template:FA/06 April 2017Template:FA/2017Template:FQ/06 April 2017Template:FQ/2017