Concentration camps

From Uncyclopedia, the content-free encyclopedia
Jump to navigation Jump to search

Concentration camps (better known as Super-Fun-Happy-Camps) are facilities, first established in Nazi Germany, that help easily-distracted kids learn how to concentrate. Nothing cures Attention Deficit Disorder like a trip to a good concentration camp!

Because Jewish kids have a higher rate of getting ADD, most of the kids sent to concentration camps are Jews (although many homosexuals and gypsy children also attend). Indeed, anyone with common sense knows not to let their kids play with Jewish kids because ADD is contagious—at least when Jews have it. Kids who associate with Jews who have ADD are often sent to concentration camps too and also painted orange, just in case. Therefore most concentration camps are made of "100% concentrated Orange Jews".

History of concentration camps[edit | edit source]

The jews were rounded up and forced to live in cramped dormitories. Here you can see the results of the starvation and ill-health prevalent in the camps.

Early years[edit | edit source]

The original idea for concentration camps came from Dutch that suggested it to British that used it against Boers at the turn of the XIX and XX centuries. Biriths really enjoyed this idea and considered it as their own. Therefore they got furious when they saw that Hitler made a plagiarism of their Dutch idea.

Early in Adolf Hitler's life, he got really frustrated with trying to talk to Jewish kids who had ADD. He would be like, "I dare you to eat this bug!" and the Jewish kid would be like, "…Let's count money!" Young Adolf didn't know how exactly to respond to this so he and his best friend Edward would beat the ever living fuck outta them, and thought nothing else of it.

As he grew older, Hitler saw this as a major worldwide problem. Nobody was able to deal with all these Jewish kids who, he claimed, all had ADD. Actually, not just regular ADD. In his writings, Hitler said that these Jewish kids had a special disease called Jewish ADD and that German kids were the only ones who possessed the antibodies to combat this disease. He dedicated his life to erasing this disease from the Earth. Over at Wikipedia, they say there was no "Jewish (disease) Problem" but we know better, now don't we, mein kamerad.

Implementation[edit | edit source]

When Satan became Supreme Overlord of the Underworld, he realized that there were a lot of Jewish kids under his dominion who just couldn't or wouldn't concentrate. So he formed special camps throughout his whole kingdom that were dedicated to finding the Final Solution to the Jewish Problem - an inability to focus. Since then, the concentration camps have been running continuously.

A concentration camp is what was used as a holiday camp for religious people until the fall of 1945, the camps were large and spacious with showers to die for. The bathrooms were the main features of these leisure parks, they smelt really nice and clean and were purified every day. They were shut down due to lack of government funding and due to a recent fall of a main politician they were shut down, they are now used today as museums were you can still get that holiday feeling.

In the concentration camp, there is every necessity to a nice life including a library with 5000 copies of Der Führer's Mein Kampfy Chair, a book that counters Jewish ADD and presents a unique and thought-provoking final solution for it. However, there are many illiterates who cannot read this beautiful book, so it is common for an SS Guard to read aloud to them. As they are enlightened, they might volunteer to work in coal mines or on gathering the staple resource of the area, potatoes.

Some common locations of the Nazi Holiday Camps include: Bergen Beslen,Buchenwald, Treblinka, Dacau, Dora, and Mauthausen. As Jewish ADD patients get more "Travel Points" or sometimes called "Happiness Points", the SS Guards may transfer them to the premium camp, Auschwitz.